Show Notes
In Part 2 of our introduction to Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), host Amy Kotha explores the social characteristics that make this autism profile so complex - especially masking, fluctuating social skills, and the surprising ways demand avoidance shows up in relationships. Amy shares personal stories and expert insights to help parents recognize common PDA traits like masking at school, social burnout, resistance to hierarchy, and people-centered obsessive behaviors. Learn how PDAers can...
More from The PDA Parenting Podcast
What happens when your child is dysregulated - and suddenly you are, too? In this episode of the PDA Parenting Podcast, Amy talks with therapist, author, and educator Stacy Nation about what’s happening beneath challenging behavior, why co-regulation matters, and how our own childhood experiences and nervous-system patterns can shape the way we respond to our kids. They explore co-regulation, empathy, parent triggers, school struggles, and why connection is so important when parenting P...
Even when we understand PDA, autonomy, nervous system safety, and the difference between “can’t” and “won’t,” old compliance-based parenting patterns can still sneak in. In this episode, Amy explores how even compassionate, PDA-friendly strategies can quietly become focused on getting our child to comply - and what changes when we replace “How do I get my child to do this?” with “What might I not understand yet?” Through personal stories about parenting her daughter, Amy talks about fluctuati...
Why do autistic meltdowns seem to happen over something so small? In this episode of The PDA Parenting Podcast, parent coach Amy Kotha explores why the visible trigger is rarely the true cause of a meltdown. Through the fictional story of Emma, Amy illustrates how sensory challenges, masking, unexpected changes, and accumulated stress can overwhelm a child's nervous system long before a meltdown occurs. Listeners will gain a deeper understanding of why meltdowns aren't manipulative or intenti...
Grief isn't only about death. Sometimes it's saying goodbye to a season of parenting. Sometimes it's watching your child grow up. Sometimes it's the end of a coaching group, a move, a beloved pet, or simply the realization that life is changing. In this deeply personal episode, Amy shares a week filled with endings - including the unexpected loss of her family's beloved dog, Keira - and the powerful lessons it taught her about grief, nervous systems, parenting, and love.&nbs...
What if PDA isn't a behavior problem at all? In this episode, Amy explores a powerful shift in perspective that can change how parents understand PDA. Instead of viewing avoidance, refusal, aggression, or meltdowns as the problem, what if these behaviors are actually signals from a nervous system working hard to stay safe? Drawing on the work of Robyn Gobbel, Mona Delahooke, Bruce Perry, and emerging PDA research, Amy discusses the connection between autonomy, anxiety, nervous system st...