OCD vs Anxiety vs ADHD in Kids: ERP, Diagnosis & Next Steps w/ Dr. Tamar Chansky
The ADHD Kids Can Thrive PodcastShow Notes
Episode Summary OCD vs. anxiety in kids, ERP treatment, and co-regulation for families. Dr. Tamar Chansky explains how to tell OCD from general anxiety, where it overlaps with ADHD, and how parents can lower fear, connect first, and coach skills that stick. We cover PANS/PANDAS (sudden-onset OCD after infections), when to seek medical evaluation, and first-line care like Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) plus hopeful long-term outcomes and “tune-ups” during new life stages. Guest Dr. Tamar Chansky, founder of the Children’s and Adult Center for OCD and Anxiety, author of Freeing Your Child from Negative Thinking, Freeing Your Child from Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, and Freeing Yourself from Anxiety. She’s known for translating evidence-based care into clear, compassionate strategies families can use right away. Episode Overview Parents often confuse anxiety (“what-ifs,” future worry) with OCD (intrusive thoughts + compulsions). Dr. Chansky clarifies the difference and shows how naming patterns as “OCD-normal” separates the child from the disorder and lowers shame. You’ll learn why parent nervous-system regulation is step one, how ERP works through stepwise “courage challenges,” when medication may help (especially with co-occurring depression in teens), and how to approach PANS/PANDAS: treat medical triggers first, then layer CBT/ERP as needed. Bottom line: pediatric OCD is highly treatable, and families can expect progress plus occasional “tune-ups” during transitions. What We Talk About (Highlights)
Language that helps: call patterns “OCD-normal,” separate child from disorder; connect → then problem-solve
Anxiety vs. OCD: anxiety = “what-ifs”; OCD = intrusive thoughts + compulsions (“superstition on steroids”)
Emotional regulation: parent down-regulation enables child co-regulation
PANS/PANDAS: sudden spikes after infections (e.g., strep/Lyme/post-viral); treat medical cause first; add CBT/ERP later
First-line care for pediatric OCD: ERP with stepwise “courage challenges”; meds not first-line for most kids, may help some—especially teens with depression
Parent power: Coaching parent responses can rival direct child therapy
Outlook: highly treatable; skills + neuroplastic change; periodic “tune-ups” during new stages (“last-yearing it”)
Resources & Links
Dr. Tamar Chansky & books: https://tamarchansky.com/
PANDAS Physicians Network: https://www.pandasppn.org/practitioners/
About Your Host Kate Brownfield, Certified Whole Person & ADHD Parent Coach; author of How We Roll: A Parent’s Journey Raising a Child with ADHD; host of The ADHD Kids Can Thrive Podcast. Every child with ADHD is unique, so are their strengths and struggles.Website & coaching: ADHDKidsCanThrive.com Free Download Get the first 3 chapters of How We Roll free: https://lp.constantcontactpages.com/sl/On1ABRH/first3chapters Need Support? Schedule a free consultation: https://adhdkidscanthrive.com/appointment/ Enjoyed this episode?
Subscribe to The ADHD Kids Can Thrive Podcast
Share with a parent who needs encouragement today
Leave a quick rating/review—it helps other ADHD families find the show
More from The ADHD Kids Can Thrive Podcast
When a child with ADHD struggles with emotional outbursts, anxiety, or everyday demands, how do we know what's ADHD, what's stress, and when overwhelm may be playing a larger role? Kate Brownfield talks with Dr. Aimie Apigian, double board-certified physician and author of The Biology of Trauma, about the connection between ADHD, chronic stress, trauma, and emotional dysregulation in children and parents. They explore why some children shut down or become easily overwhelmed, how disorganization can reflect deeper struggles, and why understanding what's beneath a child's behavior can help parents respond with more compassion and connection. Dr. Aimie also shares how parents can recognize their child's limits, reduce overwhelm patterns, and build a greater sense of safety and resilience at home. Learn more about Dr. Aimie Apigian and her work:https://www.biologyoftrauma.com/ ADHD parent coaching and resources with Kate Brownfield:https://adhdkidscanthrive.com
What should parents know about ADHD from a pediatrician’s point of view? Board-certified pediatrician Dr. Phil Boucher joins Kate Brownfield to talk about ADHD in children, what parents should understand, and the questions worth asking when a child is struggling at home or at school. Dr. Boucher, a pediatrician in Lincoln, Nebraska, and father of six, brings both a medical perspective and years of experience working with children and families. This conversation helps parents better understand ADHD, think more clearly about their child’s needs, and work more effectively with the professionals supporting their child. Learn more about Dr. Phil Boucher at DrPhilBoucher.com. For ADHD parent coaching, resources, and more episodes of the ADHD Kids Can Thrive Podcast, visit ADHDKidsCanThrive.com.
What if anxiety isn’t always something we need to get rid of? In this episode of The ADHD Kids Can Thrive Podcast, Kate Brownfield talks with Dr. Tracy Foose, a board-certified psychiatrist, Associate Professor at the UCSF School of Medicine, and former Director of the UCSF Anxiety Disorders Program. Dr. Foose helps parents understand fear and anxiety differently: as uncomfortable but protective emotions that can carry important information. Kate and Dr. Foose explore how parents can better understand anxiety in kids and teens, respond without becoming consumed by the anxiety themselves, and help children build a healthier relationship with fear rather than simply trying to make it disappear. Dr. Foose has spent more than 15 years studying and treating anxiety and continues to teach about fear and anxiety at UCSF School of Medicine. Learn more about Dr. Tracy Foose:https://www.drfoose.com ADHD parent coaching with Kate Brownfield:https://adhdkidscanthrive.com Free ADHD Parent Reset:https://lp.constantcontactpages.com/sl/IUVgRZz
What if the goal of homework isn’t just getting tonight’s assignment turned in? When homework becomes a nightly cycle of reminders, frustration, missing assignments, and “Did you check Google Classroom?”, parents can easily end up carrying more and more of the responsibility. In this solo episode of The ADHD Kids Can Thrive Podcast, Kate Brownfield, ACC, ADHD Parent Coach, explores how to tell the difference between supporting your child’s executive-function skills and becoming the skill for them. Kate shares her experience helping her son manage school organization, why ADHD homework struggles are often about more than academics, and how parents can identify where the process is actually breaking down. She discusses task initiation, emotional resistance, after-school decompression, body doubling, practical scaffolding, and why the right support should match the child in front of you. Most importantly, this episode zooms out to the bigger goal: helping children with ADHD get through school in a way that builds capability, self-understanding, self-advocacy, and less shame while protecting the parent-child relationship from becoming consumed by homework management. In this episode:
My guest is Lorelei Brush, author of The Boy with the Butterfly Mind, a novel that explores what can happen inside a family when a young child begins showing signs of ADHD and neurodivergence. Lorelei is a former assistant professor of child development and the parent of a neurodivergent child, bringing both professional knowledge and lived experience to the story. We discuss the fear of labeling a child, ADHD across generations, school struggles, marriage and family dynamics, and why supporting a child with ADHD often requires looking beyond symptoms and strategies to understand the whole family. We also explore something different: the power of fiction. Research and expert guidance can teach us a great deal about ADHD, but a story can let us experience a family from the inside, sometimes offering insight, empathy, and even healing that factual information alone may not reach. We talk about the meaning behind a “butterfly mind,” the importance of recognizing a child’s strengths, and why there may not be one right way to help a neurodivergent child thrive. Learn more about Lorelei Brush and The Boy with the Butterfly Mind:https://www.amazon.com/Boy-Butterfly-Mind-Novel/dp/B0FWZZ39BH/ FREE ADHD Parent Reset7 Things to Do Differently When What You’re Trying Isn’t Working Get the free guide:https://lp.constantcontactpages.com/sl/IUVgRZz For private ADHD parent coaching and the Anchor Your ADHD Family community:https://adhdkidscanthrive.com/ Timestamps (00:00) Lorelei Brush and The Boy with the Butterfly Mind(02:23) Why Lorelei wrote a novel about raising a child with ADHD(05:23) How fiction can create insight, empathy and healing(08:00) What does “butterfly mind” mean?(10:40) Helping an ADHD child—and the whole family—thrive(15:19) When school becomes the place a child’s differences are noticed(19:23) ADHD, family dynamics and neurodivergence across generations(22:53) The fear of labeling a child with ADHD(25:30) The parent trap of trying to research and “solve” everything(28:36) There is no one right way to raise a neurodivergent child