Who We Are & Why We're Here

The messy truth about midlife friendships Can you miss a friend and still know that the friendship doesn't quite fit your life anymore? We talk a lot about romantic relationships ending, but what about friendships? The ones that gradually drift, the ones we hold onto because of shared history, and the ones that surprise us by coming back into our lives years later. In this episode of The Messy Midlife Toolkit, Vivienne and Janine explore what happens to friendships as we get older, change direction and start wanting different things from life. From moving countries and making new friends in midlife to navigating friendships when one person has children and the other doesn't, we talk about loyalty, guilt, people-pleasing and the uncomfortable question: are we still friends because we enjoy each other's company, or because we've known each other for 30 years? And how do you know whether you've genuinely grown apart or whether a friendship simply needs a little more attention? Your Messy Midlife Toolkit We share a simple Friendship Circles exercise to help you reflect on the people in your life, the friendships you want to nurture, and whether there's room for somebody new. Read more about friendships Vivienne has written a Substack article, How to Tell if a Friendship Has Reached Its Use-By Date, which explores these ideas further and includes the Friendship Circles exercise. Read the article here. Want to work with us? We're both coaches, working individually with people navigating change, uncertainty and the questions that come up at different stages of life. Work with Vivienne: Life and career coaching for people who know something needs to change but aren't sure what they want instead. Work with Janine: Wellbeing coaching and support for people navigating changes in their careers, health and everyday lives. Come and join the conversation We'd love to hear your experiences of friendships that have changed, faded or found their way back. Find us on Instagram: @themessymidlifetoolkit And if you enjoyed this episode, please follow the podcast and share it with a friend. It really helps us reach more listeners.

What if you’re good at your job, but it doesn’t give you what it used to? You don’t have to hate your job to start wondering whether it still fits.

How can you have so much life experience, and somehow trust yourself less?

Why can you feel exhausted when, physically, you haven’t actually done that much?

Ever found yourself snapping at someone you love, lying awake overthinking, doom scrolling, or feeling completely overwhelmed by something that normally wouldn’t bother you?