Show Notes
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Sarma Melngailis was once the queen of New York’s vegan scene — a Wharton‑educated former Wall Street analyst who turned Pure Food and Wine and One Lucky Duck into celebrity hotspots frequented by Alec Baldwin, Woody Harrelson, Gisele Bündchen, Tom Brady, and many more.
Then her life collapsed into one of the most infamous restaurant scandals of our time: a controlling partner, psychological abuse, coercive control, missing millions, a fugitive manhunt, Rikers Island, and the Netflix true crime documentary Bad Vegan: Fame. Fraud. Fugitives.
In this episode of The Hidden Third, Sarma sits down with me to break down how a serial con man and psychological abuser — a man who first introduced himself to her as “Mr. Fox” — took over her mind and her life. We dig into:
How a serial con man/abuser who called himself “Mr. Fox” (Anthony Strangis) slowly took control of her decisions, her finances, and her reality.
The elaborate belief system he built around her: promising to make her dog Leon immortal, claiming access to a powerful otherworldly “family,” and turning wire transfers into supposed tests of loyalty.
How he used spiritual language and “tests” to coerce her sexually — pressuring her into sex and sexual acts under the guise of bringing light, protection, and transformation into her life.
The “meat suit” — how he used his own body and weight gain as yet another test of her devotion, and a tool of psychological control.
How the press treated her, including the viral tabloid story that she was caught because “the vegan ordered a pizza” — a headline she says is completely false.
Why she believes Bad Vegan unfairly portrayed her story, and what the documentary leaves out.
How scammers and psychological abusers gain power over smart, empathetic people — and why intelligence alone isn’t a shield against coercive control.
The mechanics of coercive control, isolation, and emotional abuse, and how one person can quietly take over your decisions, your money, and your sense of reality.
How she was diagnosed as being on the spectrum late in life — and how that helped her understand both her vulnerabilities and her strengths.
Her relationship with Alec Baldwin — and her thoughts on his marriage to Hilaria Baldwin.
The cost of public shame, and what recovery looks like after fraud, prison, and global headlines — including her attempt to reclaim her story through her memoir The Girl with the Duck Tattoo.
If you’re interested in true crime, scam stories, cult psychology, coercive control, or the dark side of fame and celebrity culture, this interview goes far beyond the documentary and tells the story in Sarma’s own words. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Disclaimer: Marilyn Manson, whose legal name is Brian Warner, has denied Evan Rachel Wood’s allegations. He has previously said that her claims are “horrible distortions of reality” and that his intimate relationships were consensual. In January 2025, Los Angeles County prosecutors announced that no criminal charges would be filed following a four-year investigation, stating that the domestic-violence allegations fell outside the statute of limitations and that they could not prove sexual-assault charges beyond a reasonable doubt. The DA’s office also said it “recognize[s] and applaud[s] the courage and resilience” of the women who came forward, noting that their advocacy helped bring greater awareness to the challenges faced by survivors of domestic abuse and sexual assault.
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