EVOLVE with Dr. Tay: the podcast for parents of autistic kids

236 | how to support your autistic child through burnout with amanda diekman (part 3)

EVOLVE with Dr. Tay: the podcast for parents of autistic kids

Show Notes

about this episode (+ scroll for resources) 👇 this episode wraps up our three-part series on autistic burnout. dr. tay is joined by amanda diekman, author of The Parent's Handbook for Kids in Burnout, to talk about what burnout recovery can actually look like over time and why healing is rarely linear. amanda breaks down the phases of burnout, how support needs change across each phase, what “deep rest” can look like for kids, and why parents may need to continually recalibrate between accommodation, capacity-building, safety, and trust.

you’ll hear about: why burnout is often a long-term healing process rather than something to “fix” the phases of burnout and how to recognize where your child may be why curiosity can return before actual nervous system capacity how accommodation needs can shift throughout recovery the role of school, medication, therapy, safety planning, and basic needs what deep rest can actually look like for autistic kids why parents often need support for their own nervous systems, too

timestamps 00:00 introduction to burnout and amanda diekman's background 02:15 the long journey of writing the burnout book 03:16 shifting mindset from fixing to living well in burnout 04:24 understanding burnout as a long-term process 06:34 defining burnout 08:08 the impact of school and environment on burnout 16:22 the butterfly metaphor: from chrysalis to emergence 19:58 phase one: the child as "a pile of goo" 21:01 phase two: curious but no capacity 23:27 learning to communicate and trust building 24:17 phase three: re-emergence and thriving 39:53 deep rest and recognizing signs of exhaustion

resources ⚡️ The Parent's Handbook for Kids in Burnout by amanda diekman — a low-demand guide to understanding burnout, supporting recovery, navigating the different phases, and helping your child heal and thrive ⚡️ other episodes to listen to include amanda's previous episode (113), episode 204, and parts 1 and 2 of this series (234 & 235) ⚡️ EVOLVE the membership — ongoing education, monthly masterclasses, and weekly Q+A support for parents of autistic kids ⚡️ explore dr. tay’s clinical services, parent resources, and support at drtaylorday.com ⚡️ follow dr. tay on instagram @the.dr.tay for practical autism education, behind-the-scenes reflections, and parenting insights

More from EVOLVE with Dr. Tay: the podcast for parents of autistic kids

Oct 14, 2026

about this episode (+ scroll for resources) 👇 this episode is part 2 of our autistic burnout series. dr. tay is joined by patrick casale, a neurodivergent therapist, podcaster, entrepreneur, and group practice owner, for a conversation about what autistic burnout can feel like . patrick shares his lived experience with burnout, the overlap between autistic burnout and chronic illness, the impact of societal demands, and why recovery is rarely as simple as “just reduce demands” or “take a break.” this conversation offers both validation and practical insight for parents who are trying to better understand their child’s burnout, support recovery, and recognize early warning signs before the nervous system fully crashes.

Oct 7, 2026

about this episode (+ scroll for resources) 👇 this episode kicks off a three-part series on autistic burnout. dr. tay shares what she sees clinically when autistic kids are in burnout, why it can be so confusing for parents, and why traditional approaches to depression, behavior, or school refusal may not fully capture what is happening. this is a primer episode to help you understand what autistic burnout can look like, what makes it different, and why recovery often requires time, nervous system repair, reduced demands, and support for the whole family.

Sep 30, 2026

about this episode (+ scroll for resources) 👇 if your child is melting down, resisting, avoiding, running, crashing, or seeming impossible to support, sensory may be part of the story. in this episode, dr. tay welcomes laura petix, occupational therapist and author of The Sensory Code, back to the podcast to talk about sensory regulation, sensory profiles, meltdowns, and how parents can start building sensory support into daily life in a way that actually fits their child.

Sep 17, 2026

about this episode (+ scroll for resources) 👇 this episode is for the moms who feel like some weeks they can do it all… and other weeks everything feels harder. dr. tay shares a vulnerable, real-time reflection from the depths of her luteal phase and explains why cycle tracking can be such a powerful tool for understanding mood, energy, capacity, productivity, and parenting. because your hormonal health is not separate from your autism parenting journey. your body, your nervous system, your capacity, and your regulation are all part of the ecosystem your child is living in. you’ll hear about: why the luteal phase can impact mood, energy, and capacity how cycle tracking can help reduce shame and increase self-understanding the connection between hormones, mental health, and neurodivergence why parenting often requires so much “output” energy how to adjust expectations, support, and routines around your cycle why your capacity matters in the whole-family support picture

Sep 10, 2026

about this episode (+ scroll for resources) 👇 what does it mean for a child to be twice exceptional, or 2e? in this episode, dr. tay is joined by dr. megan helmen, a pediatric neuropsychologist and founder of Developmental Discoveries, to talk about 2e profiles, giftedness, autism, and why these kids are so often misunderstood. dr. megan explains how giftedness is not just “being smart,” but can involve a different way of thinking, processing, feeling, and moving through the world. when giftedness overlaps with autism, ADHD, learning disabilities, or other developmental differences, children may have areas of incredible strength alongside areas where they need significant support. this conversation explores why 2e autistic children may be missed, how they use strengths to compensate, why school performance does not always tell the full story, and how parents can better understand and support their child’s unique brain. in this episode, you'll hear: what 2e, or twice exceptional, means how giftedness and autism can overlap why 2e autistic children are often missed or misunderstood how high intelligence can mask support needs why overall IQ scores may not capture the full picture what “subtle but significant autism” can look like how 2e kids may use compensation strategies in social situations why hard things may feel easy and “easy” things may feel hard the importance of including children in the feedback and diagnostic process how to support 2e kids through strengths, accommodations, interests, and belonging why parents of 2e children deserve compassion and grace

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