Show Notes
This week we're discussing Making Peace with Our Past with Dr. Dan Allender. Most of us know our story. We could tell it in five minutes if someone asked. But knowing what happened and actually being free from it are two very different things. For a lot of solo parents, the past shows up uninvited, in a sharp reaction that didn't fit the moment, a fear that surfaces when things finally feel calm, a pattern with your kids you swore you'd never repeat. It doesn't mean you haven't tried. It means the trying might need to go a little deeper. And the longer we avoid that, the more the past quietly runs the present. In this conversation, Robert Beeson, Founder and CEO of Solo Parent, and Elizabeth Cole, single parent and co-host, sit down with Dr. Dan Allender, a clinical psychologist and author who has spent decades helping people face their stories honestly and find real freedom on the other side. His books The Wounded Heart, The Healing Path, and To Be Told have walked thousands through the hard work of understanding how the past is still shaping the present and what it actually takes to change that. Together they explore why avoidance keeps us stuck, how shame operates and what disarms it, and why grief and anger aren't problems to manage but forces that, held together, can finally move you forward. The conversation is honest, practical, and grounded in real experience from all three voices at the table. Key Insights from This Episode: Ignoring the past doesn't free you. It makes you reactive. The unaddressed past doesn't disappear, it shows up in your parenting, your relationships, and the moments you least expect it. Shame has to be faced, defied, and disarmed with kindness. Running from shame guarantees it follows you, but meeting it with defiance and then gentleness is what actually loosens its grip. Grief and anger belong together. Each one needs the other. Anger without grief hardens you, grief without anger drowns you, but held together they're what actually moves you forward. Resources Mentioned in This Episode: Dr Dan Allender The Wounded Heart The Healing Path To Be Told
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This week we're discussing Now What? Rebuilding a Life Plan. At some point in the solo parenting journey, survival mode starts to loosen its grip just enough to ask a bigger question: what do I actually want to build from here? Getting to that question and knowing how to answer it is harder than it sounds when every decision lands on you and the old rulebook no longer applies. Robert Beeson, Founder and CEO of Solo Parent, sits down with Elizabeth Cole, single parent, and Marissa Lee, author and single parent, to talk honestly about what it takes to move forward with intention when the path isn't clear yet. All three have lived this, and what they bring to the conversation is grounded, practical, and real.
This week we're discussing The Self-Care You Actually Need. If someone asked you right now what you value most, could you answer? Not what you're supposed to say, not what made sense in a different season of life but what actually drives you today. Most solo parents, if they're honest, would pause. Not because they don't care, but because survival mode has a way of burying that question under everything else that needs to get done. Robert Beeson, Founder and CEO of Solo Parent, sits down with Elizabeth Cole, single parent, and Amber Fuller, a counselor with a Master's in Marriage and Family Therapy and single parent, to talk about what values-guided self-care actually looks like in the real, messy, full life of a solo parent. Together they unpack why so many of us don't know what we value anymore, how to start finding out, and why the answer is closer than you think. Key Insights from This Episode: Knowing your values is the foundation of self-care that actually works - when self-care isn't rooted in what genuinely matters to you, it just becomes one more thing to manage. Your values don't have to be figured out all at once - they unfold - where you are emotionally shapes what your values look like right now, and that's allowed to change. What you keep returning to, even under pressure, is your truest guide - your values are already showing up in your life; the work is learning to notice them. Resources Mentioned in This Episode: Value Cards Adriana Girdler, Core Values Framework Stay Connected + Get Support: This podcast is made possible by members of The Table at Solo Parent. If this episode encouraged you, we'd love for you to join The Table by giving a recurring gift to keep these conversations going for the next single parent who needs them. Download our Solo Parent App Join a Solo Parent Group Learn more about Solo Parent Follow us on Instagram
This week we're discussing Self-Care When You Have No Margin. You know that feeling when someone suggests you take better care of yourself and your first reaction is a laugh? Not because it's funny, but because the suggestion feels completely disconnected from the day you're actually living. You already know you need it. You've thought about what it could look like, the morning routine, the workout, the quiet moment that doesn't get hijacked by something else. The knowing has never been the problem. The gap between knowing and actually pulling it off is what this conversation is about. Robert Beeson, Founder & CEO of Solo Parent, co-host Elizabeth Cole, a single parent, and contributor Amber Fuller, a counselor with a Master's in Marriage and Family Therapy and single parent, get honest about what self-care actually looks like when the margin is gone. Not the aspirational version. The real one, shaped around guilt and perfectionism and the particular exhaustion of being the only adult on call. Between the three of them, they've lived every version of this, and what they bring to this conversation is practical, grounded, and genuinely useful. Key Insights from This Episode: Both relief and restoration have a place, and telling them apart is what makes self-care actually work. One quiets the noise, the other fills you back up, and knowing which one you need changes everything about how you take care of yourself. Self-care is personal, and the best version of it is the one that actually works for your life. There is no universal prescription, and giving yourself permission to define it on your own terms is half the battle. Stillness is not passive, it is one of the most active and necessary things you can choose. Whether it looks like quiet, movement, laughter, or a good cry on the couch, getting still is where a lot of the real restoration happens. Resources Mentioned in This Episode: 40 Practical Ideas for Self-Care
This week we're discussing Becoming a Resilient Parent. Parenting was never meant to be a static skill. Your kid keeps changing, and that means you have to keep changing with them. From the toddler years to the teenage ones, every stage asks something different of you, and as a solo parent, you're the one who has to figure out what that is without another adult in the house to help you read the room. The fear of getting it wrong is real. So is the guilt of feeling like you're always one step behind. Robert Beeson, Founder & CEO of Solo Parent, sits down with Elizabeth Cole, single parent, and Amber Fuller, a counselor with a Master's in Marriage and Family Therapy (MMFT) and single parent, for an honest conversation about what it actually looks like to grow alongside your kids when every new season catches you off guard. Together they talk through why isolation makes hard seasons harder, how fear quietly drives more of our parenting decisions than we realize, and why self-compassion isn't a luxury but the actual foundation of resilience. Key Insights from This Episode: Resilience is built through open systems, not closed ones - when the only voice you're hearing is the one in your head telling you you're failing, it will keep saying that until something from outside interrupts it. Fear-driven parenting keeps both you and your kids in a box - the love-soaked, protective kind of fear can quietly close off the very relationship you're trying to protect. Self-compassion isn't optional, it's the foundation - if you're running on empty, you don't have the resources to show up for your kids the way you want to. Resources Mentioned in This Episode: Kristin Neff, researcher and author on self-compassion and resilience Dr. Dan Siegel, prior podcast guest known for his work on curiosity, connection, and child development Stay Connected + Get Support: Download our Solo Parent App Join a Solo Parent Group Learn more about Solo Parent Follow us on Instagram
This week we're discussing When Money Problems Keep Knocking You Down. You did everything right this month. You tracked the spending, made the calls, kept the budget as tight as you could. And then something broke. Or a bill arrived that wasn't supposed to. Or the end of the month showed up before the money did. You're tired in a way that's hard to explain to someone who hasn't lived it, but you're not alone in it and you're not failing as a parent. What makes financial stress so relentless for solo parents isn't just the gap between income and expenses. It's that every unexpected hit lands on one set of shoulders. There's no one to split the worry with, no backup plan walking through the door. And over time, that pressure has a way of becoming something more than financial. It starts to feel like a verdict. Robert Beeson, Founder & CEO of Solo Parent, sits down with Elizabeth Cole, a single parent, and Amber Fuller, a counselor with a Master's in Marriage and Family Therapy (MMFT) and single parent, for an honest conversation about what it actually looks like to keep going when the financial ground keeps shifting. All three have lived it, and they bring that experience into a conversation that is equal parts real and hopeful. Key Insights from This Episode: Financial stress is as much an emotional wound as a practical problem - the feeling of not having enough doesn't just hit your bank account, it hits your sense of self, and understanding that is where resilience starts. Shifting from victim mindset to agency is the beginning of real resilience - moving from "why does this keep happening to me" to "what can I actually do" is the pivot that changes everything. Reframing hardship as a season, not a sentence, changes what's possible - the hard chapter you're in right now is not the one that defines how the story ends. Resources Mentioned in This Episode: Previous Solo Parent Podcast: From Panic to Plan: Thriving as a Solo Parent on a Budget Stay Connected + Get Support: Download our Solo Parent App Join a Solo Parent Group Learn more about Solo Parent Follow us on Instagram