Show Notes
Kids today are becoming increasingly afraid of risk and discomfort- are parents part of the problem? Today bestselling author and counselor Sissy Goff joins Karen and Emily to talk about her new book, Capable, and why loving our kids well sometimes means encouraging them to do hard things. Sissy shares how moms can manage their own anxiety and trust their parenting instincts to prepare their kids for greater confidence. Don’t miss the absolutely brilliant catchphrases she offers for reminding kids that hard isn’t a bad thing!
Episode Recap: Sissy is a therapist and counselor in Nashville who has been counseling families for 33 years! (1:30) Kids today more than ever are risk and discomfort avoidant (2:18) Parents are abdicating intuition for the sake of experts (5:19) We need to re-evaluate what it means to love our kids well (7:00) How can we let go of our own anxiety to help our kids step up in independence? (13:30) The three Cs of Capability (16:17) Practical capability exercises for each age group (18:00)
Scripture: James 2:1-4 (NIV) “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” Discussion Questions: Where are you most tempted to step in and remove risk, discomfort, or struggle for your child? How might your own anxiety be affecting your child’s willingness to try hard things independently? What is one responsibility or challenge your child may be ready to handle without your help? What words could you use this week to remind your child that something being hard does not mean it is bad?
Resources: Connect with Sissy: https://www.daystarcounseling.com/ Pick up a copy of Capable on Amazon Use code WT20 to get $20 off SOAR registration today! Reach out to have Karen come speak in your community. Become a WT+ Insider this month and get an exclusive SOAR discount!
Want More of This Conversation? Wire Talk+ moms will hear practical capability-building exercises for preschoolers through teenagers, along with specific phrases that help kids believe they can handle hard things. Become an Insider today to hear more from Sissy and help us reach our goal of 400 subscribers this year!
More from Wire Talk with Karen Stubbs
What if making life easier for our kids is actually making it harder for them to grow up? Counselor David Thomas joins Karen and Emily to explain why struggle is GOOD for our kids and how doing hard things builds confidence and capability. Listen in and you’ll be challenged to resist the urge to rescue your kids and give them room to grow! Episode Recap: The pace of life has drastically changed in the last 30 years (3:00) Capability and confidence are built in the struggle to do hard things (7:15) We put too much emphasis on happiness (10:57) Why David intentionally signed his son up for a losing team one season (14:31) Narrating our own capability helps kids learn what it looks like in the real world (17:33) How can parents re-train their brains to allow more struggle in their kids’ lives? (24:47) A challenge for moms of boys! (30:30)
What if one of the best things we can do for our kids is let them struggle? Mom of eight and founder of The Exchange, Elizabeth Pehrson, joins Karen and Emily to talk about parenting for the long game. If you have a hard time watching your child fail, forget, or face the consequences of their choices, this conversation is for you! We hope it will encourage you to loosen your grip and trust God with the outcome. Episode Recap: Your job as a parent is to make sure they don’t need you - the hardest part is accepting your success (4:26) Long game parenting asks, “Who do I want my child to be at 25, 35, 45?” (6:45) How do we get more comfortable with watching our kids struggle? (9:37) Allowing them to experience natural consequences is loving (12:02) Practical examples of starting out small with independence (16:00) Trusting the Lord is the foundation of success in parenting (19:29) You are preparing them for leaving you (22:00)
Parenting a neurodivergent child can feel lonely, especially when the people around you don’t understand what everyday life looks like. Counselor Dr. Chinwé Williams joins Karen and Emily to unpack neurodivergence, executive functioning, and the important difference between “won’t” and “can’t.” Whether you’re raising a neurodivergent child or want to better understand a friend who is, this conversation will help you respond with more empathy and grace. Episode Recap: What does neurodivergent mean and who falls under that umbrella? (2:56) How do I know if it’s an actual skill deficit or simply a will deficit?’ (4:41) What is executive functioning and how do I know if my kid struggles with it? (7:53) Don’t get into unnecessary power struggles (13:08) How do we advocate for our child without removing all obstacles for them? (14:50)
Big emotions can leave even the most confident mom wondering, Is this normal… or should I be concerned? Counselor Dr. Chinwé Williams joins Karen and Emily to explain what’s happening in our kids’ brains when they completely lose it and how we can partner with them to teach coping skills so they can move toward handling hard emotions on their own. Episode Recap: Are kids struggling with mental health more these days or are we just better at recognizing it? (2:32) As young as age 5, kids are struggling with ‘task persistence’ (4:41) Anxiety is a sign - it’s not the enemy (8:54) Understanding the upstairs vs. downstairs brain (15:48) How do we help our child via co-regulation? (20:04) Where’s the line between attachment science and gentle parenting? (22:50)
Working moms carry a lot, and sometimes we make the load even heavier by carrying things God never asked us to! Erin Mashaw joins Karen and Emily to talk about mom guilt, comparison, and that nagging feeling that you’re always disappointing someone.If you’re constantly wondering whether you’re doing enough at work or at home, we hope this conversation will help you put down some of that weight!