Show Notes
<p>Sobriety, midlife purpose, and finding your spark again. Sonia sits down with activist and author <a href='https://shannonwatts.org/'>Shannon Watts</a>. Shannon is the founder of Moms Demand Action, the nation’s largest grassroots group fighting gun violence. She led the organization to pass over 500 gun-safety laws and mobilize millions of supporters. She’s been named one of TIME’s 100 Most Influential People, a Forbes 50 Over 50 Changemaker, and a Glamour Woman of the Year. In 2025 she published her book Fired Up: How to Turn Your Spark into a Flame and Come Alive at Any Age.</p><p>Together, they talk about what it really looks like to rebuild your life when the old one stops fitting. Shannon shares the story of her own “wake-up moment,” and Sonia brings her lived experience of starting over, making hard pivots, and learning to own her sobriety without apology. This episode is all about finding your spark again, even if you haven’t felt it in years.</p><p>Sonia and Shannon dive into the big questions so many women wrestle with in midlife: How do you know when you’re meant for something more? What if you’ve spent decades doing what you were <em>supposed</em> to do instead of what you actually want? How do you handle people’s opinions when you finally step into your power? And what happens when drinking, dating, parenting, obligations, burnout, and old roles start to clash with the woman you’re becoming?</p><p>Listeners will walk away with practical guidance and clarity around what lights them up. Shannon shares her simple framework for figuring out your next chapter, how to deal with criticism without shrinking, and why rest, boundaries, community, and honesty matter more than perfection. This episode also looks at signs you might be ready for a change, the myths about “purpose,” the pressure women carry in midlife, and the surprising freedom that comes with not caring what everyone else thinks.</p><p>Sonia opens up about dating in sobriety, making herself small for years, and the moment she realized she didn’t need to apologize for the life she’s building. Shannon shares the realities of starting a national movement while raising five kids, navigating co-parenting, dealing with internet trolls, and knowing when it was finally time to step back. It’s heartfelt, real, and filled with the kind of “me too” moments that make women feel less alone.</p><p>Episode Highlights </p><p>01:00 Shannon shares the moment she realized her life wasn’t aligned anymore<br>03:12 The emergency room visit that became her turning point<br>04:10 How journaling helped her map out a completely different future<br>06:02 Shannon explains her “values, abilities, desires” formula<br>07:15 Why so many women put obligations before what they actually want<br>09:20 The guilt and shame that show up when women start changing their lives<br>11:05 Sonia talks about the date that made her second-guess her sobriety identity<br>12:14 Shannon’s advice for handling criticism without shrinking<br>16:08 What launching Moms Demand Action looked like behind the scenes<br>18:02 The fear moms have about pursuing desires “at the expense of their kids”<br>20:40 How to know it’s time for a pivot even without a dramatic crisis<br>23:05 Discovering abilities you don’t realize you have<br>25:00 Sonia shares how nightly drinking revealed deeper misalignment<br>26:15 Shannon on her “controlled burn” approach to clearing space for change<br>28:20 The difference between true urgency and pressure we put on ourselves<br>30:12 Why Gen X women have more freedom in midlife than we realize<br>33:00 Shannon redefines success after years of burnout and martyrdom<br>35:18 How female friendships became the backbone of her second chapter<br>37:05 Sonia talks about intentionally rebuild
More from Sisters In Sobriety
Hardship does not pause when someone gets sober. In this episode of Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia welcomes Christina Smallwood, author of Hope in the Hard: Action Steps for Navigating Hardships. Through honest questions and shared recovery experiences, Sonia explores how Christina navigated grief, infertility, adoption, parenting a child with special needs, and a relationship with alcohol that became increasingly difficult to ignore. What happens when drinking becomes a way to quiet grief and insecurity? How can someone look successful while struggling privately? And what makes hope different from toxic positivity? Their conversation explores people pleasing, alcohol as part of an identity, family expectations, and the fear that sobriety means losing the fun. Christina describes hope as an action, rather than a demand to feel positive. She shares the difference between taking a temporary alcohol break and committing to recovery, along with the roles therapy, sponsorship, faith, and honest community played in her experience. They also discuss self-awareness, making amends, and recognizing emotional patterns that repeat across relationships. Behind Christina’s public success is a deeply personal story: losing her father, facing infertility, and navigating her daughter’s surgery while alcohol became a source of escape. She reflects on returning to drinking after seven months alcohol-free, the private turning point that led her toward recovery, and the grace that helped her feel less alone. This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our substack for extra tips, tricks and resources. SIS Links 💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram Episode highlights 01:00 — Meet Christina Smallwood03:00 — People pleasing and honest connection05:00 — The hardship that changed her life06:00 — Losing her father and finding faith07:00 — Hope versus toxic positivity08:00 — Taking recovery one step at a time10:00 — Alcohol, acceptance, and blackouts12:00 — Grief and the shift to daily drinking15:00 — Seeing a joyful sober life modeled16:00 — A seven-month alcohol break17:00 — Family expectations and moderation21:00 — Returning to drinking after surgery24:00 — A private turning point26:00 — Early sobriety and seeking support29:00 — Finding belonging in recovery meetings32:00 — Making amends and receiving grace36:00 — Hiding sobriety in social settings38:00 — Facing the insecurities beneath drinking40:00 — The weight of looking successful43:00 — Feeling less alone in the hard
On Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia and Kathleen support women in changing their relationship with alcohol and trusting themselves along the way. In this episode, Sonia talks with Nikki Sapiro Vinckier, an OB-GYN physician assistant, author of We Deserve More, and founder of Take Back Trust, about advocating for better women’s healthcare. What does medical gaslighting sound like? When does “that’s normal” leave a real concern unanswered? How can perimenopause, sobriety, and changing relationships complicate the way women understand their bodies? Sonia and Nikki explore pain, reproductive health, and the questions patients may hesitate to ask. Nikki explains how to prepare for an appointment, describe symptoms through their impact on daily life, and ask for a clear next step. The conversation covers perimenopause and menopause, trauma-informed care, LGBTQ+ inclusion, weight stigma, and rebuilding trust in a changing body. The conversation becomes personal when Sonia shares the fear and isolation of receiving an HPV result by mail. Their exchange explores sexual-health stigma, gaps in communication, and why questions about prevention and follow-up deserve space in the exam room. This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our substack for extra tips, tricks and resources. Nikki’s Links 📸 Instagram📚 We Deserve More SIS Links 💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s Instagram
What happens when a successful life includes a private struggle with alcohol? In this episode, Sonia speaks with Casey Davidson, founder of Hello Someday Coaching and host of the Hello Someday podcast, about high achievement, anxiety, and getting out of the drinking cycle. Why can drinking feel like the only way to switch off? What makes the evening “witching hour” so difficult? How can sober curiosity and gray area drinking open a conversation without labels? Sonia and Casey explore early sobriety, moderation, and the value of support from women who understand. Casey shares the practical pieces of her “sober bubble”: asking for help, changing routines, eating before the evening rush, and lowering expectations. She explains her 100-day coaching approach, discusses everyday rewards, and explores how boundaries and community create room for a more satisfying life. From college rugby and corporate pressure to motherhood and nightly red wine, Casey traces the moments that made drinking harder to ignore. She shares how a 100-day commitment grew into lasting sobriety—and how admitting she no longer wanted her corporate job helped lead her toward coaching. This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our substack for extra tips, tricks and resources. Casey’s Links 🌐 Hello Someday Coaching Website📸 Casey’s Instagram — @caseymdavidson
What happens when the drinking stops but the anger stays? Sonia welcomes Zach Brittle, LMHC, Certified Gottman Therapist, Relational Life Therapist, and host of Marriage Therapy Radio. Why can resentment linger after quitting alcohol? How can someone take responsibility without taking all the blame? What happens when partners get sober at different times? Sonia and Zach explore recovery, relationship boundaries, and rebuilding trust beyond counting drinks or sober days. Zach explains his approach to the “wise adult,” pausing before reacting, and playing the movie forward. He describes how Relational Life Therapy connects self-esteem, boundaries, and intimacy, and why having communication tools differs from being ready to use them. Sonia also asks about the difference between celebrating recovery and becoming overconfident. From asking for help during the pandemic to confronting longstanding resentment, Zach shares the experiences behind his recovery. An unforgettable Christmas tree stand, a frustrating gas-station queue, and his and Rebecca’s different paths to sobriety reveal how change has reshaped their marriage and parenting. This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our substack for extra tips, tricks and resources. Zach’s Links Website Instagram Marriage Therapy Radio SIS Links 💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s Instagram Episode Highlights 00:00 — Introducing Zach Brittle02:00 — Recovery beyond alcohol04:00 — Recognizing personal relapse risks08:00 — Drinking escalates during COVID10:00 — Asking for a sponsor’s help13:00 — Taking inventory of resentment15:00 — Owning his anger without alcohol18:00 — Responsibility versus self-blame20:00 — Anger in the gas-station queue22:00 — The pause that creates choice25:00 — Playing the movie forward27:00 — Recovery becomes a new way of living29:00 — A milestone tests his sobriety33:00 — Why tools alone aren’t enough35:00 — Self-esteem, boundaries, and intimacy40:00 — Partners on different recovery paths46:00 — Setting relationship boundaries47:00 — Alcohol’s impact beyond drink counts49:00 — Connection, fun, and life after drinking56:00 — Modeling recovery for adult children
On Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia welcomes relationship coach, author, and podcast host Monica Tanner to explore conflict, emotional safety, and intimacy when alcohol is no longer the escape hatch. Together, they explore how to ask for support, navigate difficult conversations, and reconnect through change. Does “never go to bed angry” actually help? When does communication become criticism? What happens when drinking or scrolling becomes a way to disappear during conflict? Sonia and Monica explore resentment, sober relationships, and talking about sex without turning the conversation into a performance. Monica introduces relational life therapy concepts, including protective childhood patterns, the emotional “whoosh,” and choosing a response with greater awareness. She shares examples of clear requests, healthy boundaries, side-by-side intimacy conversations, and small routines that create space for connection. Monica also shares how her parents’ divorce shaped her interest in relationships, why late-night arguments brought up fears of abandonment, and how a simple request for reassurance changed those moments in her marriage. Her son’s approaching wedding became the inspiration for her book. This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our substack for extra tips, tricks and resources. Monica’s Links 🌐 Monica Tanner’s Website🎙️ Secrets of Happily Ever After Podcast📖 Bad Marriage Advice SIS Links 💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s Instagram Timestamped Highlights 01:00 — Meet relationship coach Monica Tanner.02:00 — The divorce that reshaped her idea of marriage.04:00 — Rethinking “never go to bed angry.”06:00 — Asking for reassurance before taking a break.08:00 — Relationship maintenance before a crisis.11:00 — Why conflict can block familiar communication skills.14:00 — Recognizing protective patterns and boundaries.16:00 — Teaching a partner how to love you well.18:00 — Small requests before resentment builds.20:00 — Asking for listening instead of solutions.23:00 — Making requests without criticism.25:00 — Withdrawal, fawning, and old survival strategies.26:00 — Sonia on alcohol, conflict, and getting sober.28:00 — Withdrawing in plain sight.30:00 — Pausing during the emotional “whoosh.”34:00 — Making space for conversations about sex.38:00 — Exploring a broader definition of intimacy.41:00 — When deeper relationship problems need help first.45:00 — Monica’s routines for regular connection.46:00 — Couples work, intensives, and closing reflections.