Show Notes
Join Selfish 30, Margarita’s 30-day challenge starting November 1st
Welcome back to Being Her, where we are officially entering our selfish era. After years of talking about how to get over an ex, move from anxious to secure attachment, and create the life you want, Margarita has realised the answer to all of it is the same: become a little bit more selfish. Not selfish as in taking from others, but deliciously selfish, putting yourself at the centre of your own life and owning it. In this episode, Margarita explains why “decentring men” keeps you thinking about men, why being the good girl hasn’t made you happier or more valued, and how guilt conditioning keeps women convenient instead of unforgettable. She gets candid about her own people-pleasing, finally buying herself caviar, and the difference between being needed and being valued. She also reveals Selfish 30, her brand new 30-day challenge to help you stop delegating your life to others and actually start doing the behaviours of a woman who puts herself first.
In this episode: 1. How is being a good girl actually working out for you 2. Your life is a result of what you repeatedly prioritise 3. Stop volunteering for self sacrifice nobody is giving you a medal 4. Why being selfish feels so uncomfortable 5. Nobody is coming to hand you the life you want 6. Selfish women ask for what they want because they know what they want 7. Become less available to everyone else to become more available to yourself 8. Stop confusing being needed with being valued 9. You cannot think your way into becoming a different woman you have to do the behaviours 10. Selfish 30, 30 days to become the woman you actually want to be
If you are ready to stop thinking about it and actually do something, this is your sign.
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More from BEING HER with Margarita Nazarenko
This week’s episode comes straight from the DMs: “Can you please make a video about your partner sleeping soundly while you are crying next to him?” It’s a message Margarita gets often, and one she lived herself in her twenties. The internet’s answer is usually just “leave him,” but Margarita argues that skips the most important part: understanding what is actually happening. In this episode, she breaks down the pursue-withdraw dynamic, why men and women experience conflict so differently, and how anxious and avoidant partners are both trying to feel safe in opposite ways. She gets candid about emotional sovereignty, rumination, and handing your emotional weather to someone else. She also explains how to tell a healthy break from stonewalling, emotional overwhelm from emotional punishment, and the one simple test that shows whether it really is time to leave him.
Episode mentioned: The Bossticks with Margarita Nazarenko Peep the comments on the IG Reel that sparked this conversation
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