Letting Go to Become Who You Truly Are – Deborah Santana

There’s a challenge that comes with being known for what you do. When you move on you now have to figure out who you truly are. Deborah Santana spent more than three decades inside one of the most recognizable partnerships in American music as COO of the New Santana Band, co-architect of the Milagro Foundation, and the steady, contemplative presence behind a global touring life with her ex-husband, the legendary musician Carlos Santana.

At an age when most people are quietly winding down, she did the opposite: she walked away from a 34-year marriage, dismantled the identity she had built around someone else’s career, and started over. She earned a master’s degree in her 60s, founded a new nonprofit (Do A Little), wrote a second memoir (Loving the Fire: Choosing Me, Finding Freedom), and became a trustee of major cultural institutions.

But this is not a celebrity interview. It’s an exploration of transitions and later-life reinvention. You’ll hear about her experience and the lessons she learned that may help you. She shares the foundational daily contemplative practice she built, the calendar block for herself disguised as “a meeting” she used to jump start her writing, and the people audit she did to illuminate who is toxic and who is the light in her life. Deborah describes how liberating it can be to be a beginner again, if you’re willing.

I often say “You don’t stop growing just because you retire.” But, it’s not just a saying and Deborah’s story is an case study. If you’re ready to let go of your past and discover who you truly are now, this conversation is for you.

“When you have everything stripped away that you were known as, it is a wonderful opportunity to create exactly who you are.”

— Deborah Santana

You’ll walk away with:

A vocabulary for the identity work that retirement requires. And not just for the “what’s next” part, but also the words for the “who am I now” part.

A useful framework (the Four C’s) for organizing life after a major transition.

A replicable practice for protecting time for the work of “becoming” even when the people around you don’t quite yet understand what you’re doing.

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Bio

Deborah Santana is the author of Loving the Fire: Choosing Me, Finding Freedom, Space Between the Stars: My Journey to An Open Heart and the editor of the acclaimed anthology All the Women in My Family Sing. Her work has been featured by Vogue, Oprah, and NPR, among other national and literary outlets. She is the founder of the Do A Little Foundation, which supports women and girls in the areas of health, education, and happiness. Her work explores identity, social justice, spirituality, and the power of collective voice. She is mother to three artists: Salvador Santana, Stella Santana and Angelica Santana. She holds a Master of Arts in Philosophy and Religion with a Concentration in Women’s Spirituality. She is a leadership donor of the Smithsonian National Museum of African American History and Culture and a Lead Investor to the Courage Museum in San Francisco.

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For More on Deborah Santana

Loving the Fire: Choosing Me, Finding Freedom

Website

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Retirement Podcast Conversations You May Also Love

Mattering…in Retirement – Jennifer Breheny Wallace

Navigating the In-Between – Monique Rhodes

What Matters Most – Diane Button

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Wise Quotes

On Loving the Fire

“When there is fire, when there is struggle, if I continue to walk through and find courage and bravery, then I’m going to get to the other side and realize how much I’ve learned, how much I’ve grown.”

On Expectations

“I expect a miracle. I expec