Soul Weary: When the Work You Love Starts Draining You | Margaret Benefiel, Ph.D & Margie Buchanan-Smith
Create Magic At Work®Show Notes
What happens when work rooted in service slowly disconnects you from the very values that called you to it? For leaders working inside humanitarian crises, nonprofits, healthcare, education, business, and other demanding systems, exhaustion can become more than physical. Margie Buchanan-Smith calls it “soul weary,” the feeling of dragging yourself from one demand to the next while losing contact with purpose. Amy, Margie, and Dr. Margaret Benefiel, explore what it takes to stay human when need is immense, resources are shrinking, and systems increasingly reward compliance, metrics, and upward accountability. Margie brings the reality of decades in humanitarian leadership. Margaret brings a spiritual lens to organizational life, asking how leaders can draw on inner resources when systemic dysfunction cannot simply be worked around. Replenishment emerges not as escape from responsibility, but as part of how responsibility is sustained. So do values alignment, contemplative practice, community, and the willingness to take thoughtful risks. The work does not become less urgent when a leader pauses. Sometimes the pause restores the ability to see clearly. A breath, five quiet minutes, or an honest question about whose rules we are following can reconnect leadership with the people, purpose, and inner knowing that made the work matter in the first place. Moments That Create Momentum: When Compliance Pulls Leaders Away From Purpose – Explore how an intense focus on reporting, accountability, and organizational requirements can disconnect leaders from the people they serve and the values that brought them to the work. What It Means to Become Soul Weary – Understand how sustained pressure in purpose-driven work can slowly deplete a leader’s inner resources, and why burnout can become a signal that something deeper needs attention. Leading From the Inside Out – Discover why creating even a few minutes of space for reflection can help leaders reconnect with their values, balance soul and ego, and respond from a more grounded place. When Success Measures Lose the Human Being – See how an overreliance on metrics, bureaucracy, and traditional definitions of success can obscure the well-being of both leaders and the people their organizations exist to serve. The Difference Between Thoughtful Risk and Recklessness – Hear why trying to eliminate uncertainty can keep leaders trapped in old ways of working, while carefully judged risks create space for new possibilities to emerge.
Learn about The Soul of Leadership experience here: https://www.executivesoul.com/soulofleadership.html About the Guests: Margaret Benefiel, Ph.D., founder and CEO of Executive Soul, directs the Soul of Leadership program, which has been offered on four continents over the past 14 years. Over 3,000 executives, managers, and other leaders have participated in her seminars and programs. She has served as Chair of the Academy of Management's Management, Spirituality, and Religion Group, and is currently Vice President of the Society for the Study of Christian Spirituality. She served as Executive Director of the Shalem Institute for over 10 years, has served as Co-chair of the Christian Spirituality Program Unit of the American Academy of Religion, and has held various leadership roles in Spiritual Directors International. Author of Soul at Work, The Soul of a Leader, and Crisis Leadership, and co-editor of The Soul of Supervision, The Soul of Higher Education, Soul Food, and Hidden in Plain Sight, Dr. Benefiel has also written for The Leadership Quarterly, Management Communication Quarterly, Managerial Finance, Journal of Organizational Change Management, Organization, Personal Excellence, Psychology of Religion and Spirituality, America, Presence, The Way, Studies in Spirituality, Radical Grace, and Faith at Work. She lives with her husband in Greenbelt, MD. and enjoys hiking, cycling, reading novels, and scuba diving in her free time. https://www.facebook.com/people/E
More from Create Magic At Work®
What happens to your communication when someone pushes exactly the right button? Strategy can disappear quickly when the nervous system feels threatened. We become defensive, rush to prove our point, or get pulled into the emotional energy of the person across from us. The conversation may still be happening, but we are no longer fully present inside it. Amy and trial lawyer Jennifer Gardner explore what it takes to remain grounded when the stakes are high. Drawing from decades inside intense courtroom situations, Jennifer shares why self-regulation is not separate from effective communication. It is what makes clear thinking, presence, and persuasion possible in the first place. Their conversation moves from grounding through the body to the deeper work of humanizing the person on the other side. Jennifer also examines the line between ethical persuasion and manipulation, including how likability, empathy, and emotional connection can be used either in service of understanding or as tools for control. The goal is not to become impossible to trigger. It is to recognize the moment you are losing yourself, return to what matters, and choose how you want to respond before fear, ego, or defensiveness chooses for you. Moments That Create Momentum: Don’t Take the Bait – Explore why regulating yourself first can keep conflict from deciding how you communicate. Come Back to the Body – Learn how grounding and breath can help restore clarity when the pressure around you begins to escalate. Humanize Before You Persuade – Discover why understanding another person’s reality can make communication more compelling without abandoning your own position. Notice the Shadow of Persuasion – Recognize how likability and emotional connection can create influence, and when those same tools begin to feel manipulative. Hard Truths Still Need to Be Spoken – See how difficult conversations can create greater inner peace when your actions remain aligned with what you believe.
Today’s Edgewalker card explores how vision can emerge through presence and deep listening. When we slow down enough to notice what others may overlook, we create space to recognize possibilities, patterns, and guidance that can shape what comes next. Start your own journey of reflection, creativity, and intentional growth with the Create Magic at Work Journal or bring the wisdom of the Edgewalker mindset into your daily life with your own copy of the Edgewalker Card Deck. You can find both at https://magicthreadmedia.com/experience
What happens when the qualities that helped you succeed begin getting in the way of the leader you need to become? High performers are often rewarded for knowing the answer, moving quickly, and getting results. But as responsibility grows, leadership asks for something different. The work becomes less about proving what you can do and more about creating the conditions for other people to do their best work. Amy and Phyllis Sarkaria explore this transition through Phyllis’s book, Harvest: A Leadership Story, a fable inspired by more than a decade of participating in the olive harvest in Tuscany. Its central character, Emily, discovers that relentless speed can cause her to miss what is happening around her, including the impact she is having on her team. Their conversation explores the learner’s mindset, leadership self-awareness, rescuing versus developing others, receiving difficult feedback, and why slowing down does not necessarily mean accomplishing less. Sometimes the pause is what allows us to see the tree differently, notice what we missed, and recognize where our own habits may be limiting the people around us. Sustainable leadership is not about losing your drive. It is about becoming intentional enough to know when to use it. Moments That Create Momentum: What Got You Here Can Get in the Way – Explore why the habits that earn a promotion may not be the same ones that help someone lead well. Slow Down to Go Faster – Discover how presence and intentionality can prevent speed from creating more work, mistakes, and disconnection. Stop Rescuing the Team – Understand how constantly stepping in can limit development and keep leaders working below the level they should be leading. Feedback Only Works If You Can Hear It – Learn why receiving someone’s perception without defending yourself is essential to creating greater trust and safety. The Pause Creates Possibility – See how stepping out of constant busyness can create space for perspective, creativity, and a more sustainable way of leading.
Today’s Edgewalker card explores how meaningful connection grows when we approach difference with curiosity rather than distance. By valuing the uniqueness of others and remaining open to unfamiliar perspectives, we create opportunities to bring out the best in one another. Start your own journey of reflection, creativity, and intentional growth with the Create Magic at Work Journal or bring the wisdom of the Edgewalker mindset into your daily life with your own copy of the Edgewalker Card Deck. You can find both at https://magicthreadmedia.com/experience
What if the clutter surrounding you isn’t just taking up space, but also draining your time, attention, money, and ability to grow? Amy sits down with simplicity expert and longtime professional organizer Miriam Ortiz y Pino to explore the deeper connection between physical clutter, digital overwhelm, financial habits, and the way entrepreneurs run their businesses. Miriam challenges the idea that organization is about buying prettier containers or finding the perfect productivity app. Instead, lasting change comes from understanding what you actually need, building systems around the way you live and work, and aligning your actions with your values. Their conversation moves from money mindset and financial self-worth to decision fatigue, busy work, digital clutter, sustainable systems, and why doing more is rarely the answer. Miriam also explains why entrepreneurs need to stop waiting for the perfect solution, start paying attention to their numbers, and create businesses that support the lives they actually want. The shift can start surprisingly small. One drawer. One decision. Ten intentional minutes. Because meaningful change doesn’t require fixing everything at once. It starts by creating enough space to choose what matters next. Moments That Create Momentum: The Cost of “For Now” – See how postponing small decisions can become physical clutter, digital overload, and unnecessary mental weight. The System Comes Before the Container – Understand why another bin, app, or tool cannot solve a problem until you know what the system needs to do. Money Follows What You Value – Explore how understanding your numbers can bring spending and business decisions closer to the life you actually want. More Capacity Is Not More Freedom – The secret to actually save you more time utilizing technology. Small Wins Build Capability – How making one clear decision can close a mental loop and make positive change feel more possible.