The Ugly Truth of Domestic Violence: TheTinMen meets Dr Don Dutton

What is to be said about the 'Cornell Seven' How do you combat 'not all men, but always a man' Are the UKs 'Anti Misogyny Classes' a good thing? How do you tell the good charities from the bad? Who benefits from the gender war? ...and much more. George from TheTinMen talks to fathers and men's health advocate, Lisa Britton, about men and boy's issues across the UK and North America,. Follow Lisa at https://x.com/LisaBrittonFollow TheTinMen at instagram.com/thetinmen Chapters 00:17 What do you tihnk about the Cornell Seven? 06:57: Why don't we celebrate International Men's Day ?09:26: What do you think about the classes on anti-misogyny? 12:18: Who benefits from a gender war?16:33: What's your take on "ALL MEN"? 24:55: Why do people prefer to adopt girls? 31:17: How do I distinguish between wholesome and harmful mens orgs? 39:12: Isn't it wrong to only use the concept of "gendered rights"? 45:50: How do we talk about 'male issues' without people assuming it is an attack on women?

Founded at a kitchen table in Manchester in 2019, Mandem Meetup has grown into an award-winning charity supporting over 1,200 men a year across the UK.Unlike traditional mental health support, Mandem Meetup is non-clinical: meaning there is no chaise longue, no clipboard and pen, no textbooks or profound psychological frameworks, and, most importantly, no eye-wateringly high bill at the end of it.At Mandem, whilst finding none of that, you will instead see boys and men in talk circles, hiking, camping, learning bushcraft skills, whittling sticks, planting flowers, playing football and board games, going to the gym, helping the homeless or running litter picks.It is a new generation of mental health support that is entirely unfamiliar to everything that's come with it.And it works.In this podcast, TheTinMen meets Jamie Dennis, the founder and CEO of Mandem Meetup, from whose own experience of crisis the charity was born…Expect to hear Jamie's story, where it began, how he helps men from the forest to the mountain peaks, and how his new 5.5 acres of woodland has become the first nature space for men and boys' wellbeing in the country.Find Mandem Meetup here https://mandemmeetup.org/ and follow at @mandemmeetupChapters00:18 – What is Mandem Meetup?02:46 – The Five Pillars of Mandem Meetup03:19 – Working with incarcerated men04:14 – Man buns and men's circles: who are they really serving?06:58 – 'Incel national park', the UK's first outdoor space for men and boys10:41 – Why are men's spaces so important?13:59 – What is traditional therapy missing?17:37 – Do we overcomplicate men's mental health?22:14 – It's not easy, but it is simple25:03 – What would the Mandem men be doing, if not for you?29:23 – When did Mandem Meetup begin?37:34 – The importance of natural beauty and the outdoors39:25 – What do men tell you?41:02 – Men's trauma in prison46:12 – Politics vs the people49:32 – When will the men's health movement go mainstream?52:43 – What's next for Mandem Meetup?55:47 – How do men find and join Mandem Meetup?

Ally Fogg is one of a handful of veteran men and boys advocates in the UK, who for decades has been banging the drum for men's health and wellbeing, as a journalist, a campaigner, a chair, a public speaker, and a policy expert.He is one of the men behind the popularisation of International Men's Day, a co-founder of the Men and Boys Coalition, and the current chair of the newly formed Association for Men's Health and Wellbeing – the membership community for the UK's burgeoning men's health space.Whether it be pushing for political reform in Westminster, campaigning on behalf of his Association's members, or penning one of his infamous Twitter rants, Ally has been on the front lines from the very beginning.Here he talks with George at TheTinMen about his journey, where it began, where it is, and how it's changed.Expect to hear about the new Men's Health Strategy of England, how International Men's Day was brought to the UK, the intellectual sea change such things have brought with it, and most of all, the incredible, thankless, life-saving work that happens every day within the UK Men's Health space…Chapters:00:17 – Ally’s journey into the Men’s Sector02:44 - What is the state of boys education? 06:01 – The impacts of poor education 07:13 – “Lads Need Dads”10:19 – TheTinMen origin story and International Men’s Day17:54 – What is the UK Men’s Health space?24:38 – Men’s Sheds and Male Loneliness 25:16 – What’s changed politically for men and boys? 29:35 - Why do progressives not care about men’s issues?35:53 – Are men underrepresented? 44:21 – Do feminist slogans of “men” make sense in the real world?46:46 – The Men’s Health Strategy and Men’s Health48:38 – Is it true that “men don’t seek help?”52:14 – Paternal post natal depression in dads54:47 – Why do we need men’s spaces?59:55 – How to find the Association for Male Health and Wellbeing?Join the Association for Male Health and Wellbeing here www.amhw.org.uk/ or follow Ally at x.com/AllyFogg

Professor Nicola Graham-Kevan is a leading expert and researcher in the area of coercive control and domestic abuse, with decades of seminal research at the University of Lancashire.However, Nicola's experience of domestic abuse did not start with academia; it began with life experience, having been in a long term abusive relationship for many years. It was these traumatic experiences that started Nicola's journey, which soon became one of exhilarating discovery, personal challenge, and profound healing.In this podcast Nicola talks about how she had to relearn everything she thought she knew about domestic abuse, and her past, and how her controversial work often put her at loggerheads with other esteemed researchers such as professor Michael Johnson, as she swam against the mainstream feminist narrative of abuse...00:00 – Nicola's first hand experiences of abuse00:20 – Unlearning the feminist narrative of domestic abuse05:35 – What is bilateral abuse?08:41 – What's the difference between self defence, and bilateral abuse?09:44 – What is "coercive control"?12:02 – When does a relationship become coercive? 13:38 – "Walking on eggshells" Do you feel nervous presenting your work?16:47 – Why is it so important to take politics out of domestic abuse research? 17:32 – Why do so few want to admit the truth about domestic abuse19:53 – What happens to those who talk about male victims?21:57 – Does denying women's violence harm women too? 24:08 – "If you can't regulate your emotions, you regulate your environment instead"24:40 – Could ACES help us understand what shapes violence?29:33 – Could some instances of domestic violence be treated with couples therapy?32:33 – What do traditional domestic violence interventions look like?36:10 – What does a research backed intervention look like?37:30 – What motivates violence?40:25 – Michael Johnson's typology of violence44:34 – What is 'intimate terrorism'?49:50 – How do we handle the uncomfortable reality of domestic violence?52:59 – What is accountability?54:06 – Exploring they grey area of coercive control58:29 – Is the future bright?59:58 – What services do you recommend for men?01:00:22 – How can we change the culture for male victims of abuse?01:02:06 – Finding Professor Graham Kevan;s workFollow TheTinMen at instagram.com/thetinmenor visit thetinmen.blog

Mark Brooks OBE, is an award-winning policy advisor on men and boys.He is the Director of Policy and Communications at the Centre for Policy Research on Men and Boys, the Chair of the Mankind Initiative, a Trustee at the Association for Male Health and Wellbeing, advisor to the UK APPG on Men and Boys, and co-founder of UK Men’s Day.