188: Homeschooling ADHD Kids: How to Build Education That Fits with Leslee Dirnberger
Soaring Child: Thriving with ADHDShow Notes
Let's be honest, public school wasn't designed for kids with ADHD. Too often, these kids are labeled, misunderstood, and pushed into systems that don't fit how their brains learn best. But what if the problem isn't your child, but the system itself? In this episode of The Soaring Child Podcast, host Dana Kay, ADHD health practitioner and founder of the ADHD Thrive Method for Kids speaks with Leslie Dernberger, founder of Aspire Education, mom of four, and one of the nation's leading experts in K–12 education for neurodiverse learners. Drawing on her legal background and over a decade of experience helping families, Leslie unpacks why traditional schooling often fails ADHD kids and what parents can do about it. From understanding homeschool laws and navigating deschooling, to structuring the day and busting common misconceptions, this episode is filled with practical guidance and encouragement. Whether you're curious about homeschooling, exploring hybrid options, or just want to better support your child's learning, this conversation will give you hope and actionable tools. Links Mentioned in the Show: ▶ Aspire Education: https://www.aspireeducation.us/ ▶ Homeschool Legal Defense Association (HSLDA): https://hslda.org
Key Takeaways: [00:00] Public school isn't built for many ADHD learners andwhy fit-the-mold systems backfire. [02:37] Meet Leslie Dirnberger (Aspire Education): mom of four, homeschool veteran, legal background, supports thousands of families. [04:23] The "catalyst event": what finally pushes parents to seek alternatives. [06:03] Spotting the signal: "the spark is gone" and nothing at school is fixing it. [07:16] First steps legally: understand your state's rules; public vs. private education; where homeschooling fits. [10:05] Deschooling 101: reset the parent first; museum/nature learning to reconnect. [13:38] Foundation step: define "a good education" as a family; ask kids what learning should look like. [15:24] Myth-busting socialization: why homeschoolers often get better real-world social practice. [18:30] Colleges love homeschoolers: time management, self-advocacy, executive function. [26:27] Standardized tests miss the mark, especially for ADHD, focus on mastery instead. Memorable Moments: "The truth is, your child doesn't need to be fixed. They need an education that actually fits their brain." "There is a catalyst event that has occurred that creates a situation that the parents go, wait a second, let's take a step back here." "The spark has gone out, the light has gone out of their eyes and the parents know something's wrong." "The hardest part of homeschooling? Looking myself in the mirror and challenging my own beliefs." "What does a good education look like for your family and for your children?" "Nothing could be further from the truth — homeschoolers are often better socialized." "Colleges love homeschoolers because they know how to manage their time and advocate for themselves." "Accreditation is a game. It is absolutely garbage. It doesn't mean a thing." "Everything is geared towards standardized testing in government schools. And that's why they're in a box and they ram it through, which is terrible for ADHD kids." "Your children can own their own education and advocate for themselves at school." Dana Kay Resources: 🔗WEBSITES: ▶ https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/ ▶ https://dana-kay.com/ 👋SOCIALS: ▶ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ADHDThriveInstitute/ ▶ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/adhdthriveinstitute/ ▶ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ADHDThriveInstitute ▶ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/adhd-thrive-institute/mycompany/ ▶ Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.ph/adhdthriveinstitute/ ▶ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@adhd_thriveinstitute 📕INTERNATIONAL BEST SELLING BOOK: ▶ Thriving with ADHD – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/book/ 💻FREE MASTERCLASS ▶ Free Reduce ADHD Symptoms Naturally Masterclass - https://bit.ly/3GAbFQl ⭐COURSES & PROGR
More from Soaring Child: Thriving with ADHD
After more than four years and more than 225 episodes, Dana Kay is pressing pause on The Soaring Child Podcast - but she is clear that this is not goodbye forever. In this heartfelt solo episode, Dana reflects on why the show began, what the community has built together, and why stepping back now will allow her to give more of her energy to the families supported inside ADHD Thrive Institute.
Your child doesn't need a perfectly regulated parent. They need a parent who knows how to reconnect after things go wrong. For parents who begin recognizing their own ADHD while trying to support a child with ADHD, that shift can take a tremendous amount of pressure off parenting.
When a child repeatedly fails to follow instructions, gives one-word answers, or has an intense reaction to a small request, it may look like defiance. But the real challenge may be how their brain is processing, organizing, and communicating information after they hear it. In this episode of The Soaring Child Podcast, Dana Kay speaks with speech-language pathologist and myofunctional therapist Luba Patlakh about one of the most overlooked areas of ADHD: communication. They explore how executive functioning, hearing, language processing, sensory needs, airway health, sleep, and emotional regulation can all influence a child's ability to listen and respond. Luba also explains why parents should be cautious about being told to simply "wait and see" when they notice developmental or communication concerns. She shares the signs that may warrant a professional evaluation, how speech therapy differs from occupational and physical therapy, and why a multidisciplinary approach can help families better understand what is happening beneath a child's behavior. Parents will also learn practical strategies they can begin using immediately, including how to pause before reacting, gather meaningful observations, model language, and use Luba's "field of two" technique to encourage children to communicate their needs more clearly. This conversation is a supportive reminder that behavior is often communication, and that understanding the reason behind a child's struggle can lead to more compassionate and effective support.
Tune in as we continue our Summer Series with another fan favorite episode!
Have you ever wondered why your child struggles with meltdowns, impulsivity, anxiety, or digestion issues? The answer might not be behavioral—but neurological. In this episode of The Soaring Child Podcast, we continue our summer series of Fan Favorite Episodes with host Dana Kay and Dr. Tony Ebel, a pediatric wellness chiropractor.