Tuesday Truth: Self-Hatred

In this episode of From Borderline to Beautiful, Rose Skeeters speaks to the heavy places in recovery where sensitivity feels like a burden or a weapon of shame. She shares how the journey can leave people feeling that everything is their fault, that they are too much, and that life would be easier if they were different. Drawing from her own experience and from a recent fall coaching group, Rose offers a gentle reframing: sensitivity is not a flaw to erase, but a gift that can be honored once shame loosens its grip. She invites listeners to take one small, joyful step this week to care for that sensitive part of themselves—whether that is serving someone, creating something simple, sitting with another person, or noticing beauty. The episode is a mustard seed of hope for anyone who feels alone in the hard work of recovery. Key points: How sensitivity can become tied to shame and self-hatred in recovery The experience of feeling like everything is your fault Realizing sensitivity can also be a source of compassion, joy, and connection One small, practical way to honor your sensitivity this week Why a mustard seed of hope is enough to keep moving toward a life worth living

In this episode, Rose Skeeters and Jay Skeeters explore the importance of vulnerability, how smoke and mirrors behaviors develop, and the impact on relationships and personal growth. They share personal stories and practical insights to help listeners understand and practice vulnerability for healthier connections.Keywords vulnerability, smoke and mirrors, emotional honesty, personal growth, relationships, self-awareness, mental health, BPD, emotional regulation, authenticity Key topics The role of vulnerability in personal and relational growth How smoke and mirrors behaviors develop and their impact The connection between vulnerability and emotional health Personal stories illustrating the consequences of avoiding vulnerability Strategies for building trust and practicing vulnerability Book a session with Rose or Jay: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠thriveonlinecounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Call/Text: 844-984-7483 (844-9-THRIVE) Podcast Website: thriveonlinecounseling.com Follow the show for more on BPD recovery, betrayal trauma, shadow work, values-based healing, and building authentic relationships.

In this episode, Rose Skeeters explores how love, acceptance, and training can transform challenging traits into strengths, especially in the context of childhood development and adult self-acceptance. She discusses practical ways to reframe big emotions, hyperfixation, dissociation, and other traits as potential sources of growth and creativity. Keywords self-acceptance, emotional regulation, childhood development, mental health, personal growth, trauma, sublimation, dissociation, hyperfixation, therapy Key Topics The importance of love, acceptance, and training in childhood development How big emotions can lead to shame or growth depending on support The concept of sublimation and turning traits into creative or productive outlets The role of dissociation and watching oneself as a movie in healing Practical examples of transforming hyperfixation into mastery or craft The impact of shame on self-identity and how love can reshape it The significance of training and acceptance in adult mental health Strategies for turning traits like big emotions and hyperfixation into strengths

Shame says you are the problem. Living amends asks a better question: How will you live now so the same harm is not repeated?Living amends is not another apology. It is the practice of repairing harm by living differently—especially when shame, rumination, or a one-time “I’m sorry” has not created change. In BPD recovery, guilt and shame can become an identity. This episode explains living amends—repair through consistent action rather than endless apology—and how a simple writing practice can open the door to self-forgiveness without self-punishment. Key points • Living amends = ongoing changed behavior, not a transaction. • It is useful when contact would cause more harm, the person is gone, or words have already been overused. • In BPD recovery it counters shame-identity, builds accountability without self-attack, and practices consistency in relationships. • Writing clarifies the pattern, the impact, the new behavior, and the value underneath it. • Forgiveness here is not “it didn’t matter.” It is releasing self-punishment while staying responsible. Fall Group – Starting September 30 Fall group forming, register today!⁠I’m running a small fall group beginning September 30. Space is limited on purpose so participants can actually practice these skills with support and feedback. If you’ve been wanting structured work around emotion regulation, abandonment fear, and breaking the safety-behavior cycle, this group is designed for that. Individual session openings are also available if you prefer one-on-one work. Details: ⁠⁠⁠thriveonlinecounseling.com⁠⁠⁠ Book a session with Rose or Jay: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠thriveonlinecounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Call/Text: 844-984-7483 (844-9-THRIVE) Podcast Website: thriveonlinecounseling.com Follow the show for more on BPD recovery, betrayal trauma, shadow work, values-based healing, and building authentic relationships.

Fear looks like an ocean. It looks like it will swallow you. Jay puts language on something a lot of people in BPD recovery already feel: the fear is a mile wide and an inch deep. From a distance it looks massive. After you take one step, you find out you can stand. In this episode of From Borderline to Beautiful, Rose and Jay talk about what actually gets you across that threshold — not more confidence first, but action. Confidence comes after you begin. We cover: Why fear looks like drowning when it is often a puddle Why you do not need confidence before you act How past experiences make a small step feel huge Why “I’m frustrated” is not the same as “I’m leaving” Fight, flight, and freeze — and what each one is protecting How fear gets used to control, cover, or avoid being exposed Trading humiliation for patience Aligning your fight with the desire of your heart: a life worth living, not comfort in shame