Show Notes
In this solo episode of The Breakup Debrief, Kelly dives into one of the most painful and triggering post-breakup experiences: seeing your ex move on. Whether it’s through social media, mutual friends, or simply knowing they’re treating someone new differently, watching an ex appear happier, more consistent, or more emotionally available can hit your self-worth hard. Kelly unpacks why this experience hurts so deeply, what it actually means (and what it doesn’t), and the four main reasons an ex might show up differently in a new relationship. She explores the psychology behind ego, comparison, and rejection and reminds listeners that someone else receiving what you once asked for does not mean you weren’t worthy of it. If you’ve ever found yourself thinking, “Why couldn’t he do that for me?” this episode will help you reframe the narrative, protect your peace, and continue healing without letting comparison pull you backwards.
📧 Share your story for the “Where Is She Now?” segment: [email protected] 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching
More from The Breakup Debrief Podcast
⚠️ Trigger warning: this episode discusses compulsive sexual behaviour, cheating, betrayal trauma & pornography. Please take care of yourself & if anything comes up, reach out for support. This week Kelly is joined by one of the UK's leading psychosexual & relationship psychotherapists- Silva Neves. Silva has been working in this field for 15 years, is an award-winning author & specialises in compulsive sexual behaviour, trauma & relationships.
⚠️ Quick note: due to a technical hiccup (no Wi-Fi 😂) the video is only available for the first few minutes of this episode. The audio is perfect throughout so you're not missing a thing- just Kelly & her thoughts, no visuals required. Sorry about that!
A short one this week. A snappy one. A tough love bestie one. Kelly was chatting to a client recently who is dating someone she describes as amazing. Incredible, actually. Smart, kind, successful, the works. & instead of being excited about it, she was terrified. Because she was convinced he was out of her league. So Kelly has some things to say about that. You'll hear: ✨ Why meeting someone amazing should feel exciting,not like a threat ✨ The difference between putting someone on a pedestal & genuinely feeling like you can't measure up ✨ Why that feeling of inadequacy almost always comes back to the same thing- self-worth ✨ The counterproductive cycle of people-pleasing & shrinking yourself from the very beginning & why it sets you up for exactly what you're trying to avoid ✨ Why only egotistical arseholes & narcissists actually want a partner who worships them 😂 ✨ The sheet of paper exercise & why you'd call the person on it amazing until someone tells you it's you ✨ The most important question in dating & it's not "does he like me?" ✨ Why you can feel lucky & know you deserve it at the same time, both can coexist ✨ "If he's with you, he's choosing to be with you, so why do you think he's amazing but he can't make his own decisions?" ✨ Absa-f**king-lutely. Do I love myself? Yes. Do I think my partner is lucky to have me? Yes. Do I know I'm lucky to have him? Also yes. That's the goal 💚 He's amazing. And so are you. Get a grip ❤️🔥 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: [email protected] 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
This week Kelly is joined by a very special guest- Thilinie, a past client of the Breakup Empowerment Programme, who has very generously agreed to come on & share her story.
Yes, Kelly is a Breakup Empowerment Coach & no, she is not automatically against you getting back with your ex. This week she's saying what she actually thinks & it might surprise you. Two clients recently told her they'd gotten back with their ex. She was happy for both of them. Here's why- & here's what needs to be true for it to be a good decision. You'll hear: ✨ Why Kelly is not against getting back with your ex & what actually determines whether it's the right call ✨ The two clients who got back with their exes & why Kelly responded the way she did ✨ Why hoping you'll reconcile is a completely normal part of a breakup & when that hope eventually goes away ✨ The wrong reasons to go back: loneliness, fear, scarcity, ego, obligation. None of these are reasons ✨ The right reasons to go back & what making that decision from a place of security actually looks like ✨ Why you need to be okay on your own before you can go back & how you know you're there ✨ What needs to be different this time- the non-negotiables, the changes, the work ✨ Why the people in your life who are against it deserve to be heard- when to listen to them & when to make your own decision ✨ The "keep going back until you hate him" trend & why Kelly can't get behind it ✨ Disney is Disney. Real life is real life... &they are not the same thing 😂