
#292 Find Freya a Fella: Dating Beyond the Apps (with Freya Graf)
Men, Sex, and Pleasure with Cam FraserShow Notes
On this episode of #mensexpleasure, Cam chats with Freya, a sex coach and educator and host of The Labia Lounge. They discuss her “Find Freya a Fella” hybrid PR/social experiment aimed at finding a partner while documenting modern dating frustrations like app fatigue, micro-rejections, loneliness, and Australia’s “nonchalance” about showing interest. Boycotting apps, she attends Melbourne singles events and practices meeting people “in the wild” by initiating conversations, being more approachable, and building community to counter scarcity mindset. They explore ethical “practice” in approaching strangers, attunement to cues, reducing pressure by reframing dates, and her idea for a “Mates and Dates” mixer. Freya shares mixed results—some dates but no long-term match—plus stigma women face for openly wanting commitment, and where to follow the campaign online.
Key points: 07:08 Why Dating Feels Broken 11:43 Meeting People Offline 15:39 Mindset And Scarcity 18:09 Approaching With Respect 26:43 Results And Stigma 31:21 What Makes A Good Date 38:18 Effort, Nonchalance, and Clarity 51:23 Where To Follow Along
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