
Learning to Parent the Child You Have, Not the Child You Expected
AT Parenting Survival | Raising Kids with OCD & AnxietyShow Notes
Every parent begins their journey with hopes and expectations. We imagine what family life will look like, what milestones our children will reach, and the experiences we’ll share together. But when anxiety, OCD, autism, ADHD, chronic illness, or other challenges change that picture, many parents find themselves quietly grieving the life they thought they’d have.
In this episode, we talk about the difference between grieving and getting stuck in grief. You’ll learn why it’s okay to mourn the expectations you once held, how societal pressures and comparisons can make parenting even harder, and why clinging to artificial timelines often creates unnecessary stress for both you and your child. We’ll also explore what it means to truly parent the child in front of you, not the child you imagined. Every child needs something different, and learning when to gently push, when to pause, and how to adjust your approach can transform your relationship and help your child thrive.
Ultimately, our goal isn’t to raise children who check every box or meet every milestone on someone else’s schedule. It’s to raise children who feel empowered, heard, loved, and willing to keep trying, even when life doesn’t go as planned.
If you’ve ever questioned whether you’re doing enough, worried your child is falling behind, or found yourself grieving the parenting journey you expected, this episode is for you. Resources Mentioned: Get the free PDF handout of this episode Register here for the FREE parenting series: How to Be an Anchor for Your Child with Anxiety or OCD *** This podcast episode is sponsored by NOCD. NOCD provides online OCD therapy in the US, UK, Australia and Canada. To schedule your free 15 minute consultation to see if NOCD is a right fit for you and your child, go to https://go.treatmyocd.com/at_parenting
This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be used to replace the guidance of a qualified professional.
Parents, do you need more support?
🌸 Here’s are resources I offer parents 👇🏻❤️
Online classes for parents raising kids with anxiety and OCD: https://atparentingsurvivalschool.com
Join the AT Parenting Community (A membership designed to support parents raising kids with anxiety or OCD): https://atparentingcommunity.com
Take one of my FREE webinars: www.Natashadaniels.com/webinars
Check out my books: www.Natashadaniels.com/books
🌸 Other social places I hang out:
http://www.facebook.com/ATparentingSurvival http://www.pinterest.com/ATparentingSurvival http://www.instagram.com/ATparentingSurvival http://www.twitter.com/Parentingsurvival Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
More from AT Parenting Survival | Raising Kids with OCD & Anxiety
Parenting kids with OCD can be tough. Especially since much of how to navigate OCD is counterintuitive. After over two decades supporting parents raising kids, teens and young adults with OCD, I have consistently seen a pattern in what parents get wrong about OCD. In this episode I break down the six most common things parents get wrong, that delay long-term progress and keep families stuck.
Parenting a child with OCD can feel lonely in ways people don’t always understand. Even when you know what OCD is, know what you’re supposed to do, and are doing everything you can to help, there are parts of this experience that can feel overwhelming, confusing, and incredibly hard to talk about. In this episode, I’m getting into some of the parenting struggles that often happen behind closed doors when your child has OCD — the parts that don’t always make it into books, treatment plans, or conversations with other parents. If raising a child with OCD has ever left you thinking, “Surely I’m not the only parent dealing with this,” this episode will help you feel a lot less alone.
Sometimes doing the right thing for your child’s OCD can feel completely wrong.
Maybe they can go to school, visit friends, or function fairly well outside the house, but the second they get home, OCD seems to take over. That can leave parents wondering why the rules, avoidance, contamination fears, or compulsions seem so much stronger in one environment than another. In this episode, I explain some of the reasons OCD can look different at home, including why home may become a “safer” place for compulsions, how contamination chains can build up over time, and why certain family members or spaces can become incorporated into OCD’s rules. I also talk about what can happen when families start believing that changing locations will solve the problem—and why OCD often finds a way to come along for the ride. If you’ve ever wondered, “Why is their OCD so much worse here?” this episode will help you understand what may be going on beneath the surface and what to do about it.
If your child seems to have big reactions to sounds, textures, clothing, food, transitions, or everyday experiences, sensory processing may be playing a bigger role than you realize. In this episode, I’m joined by occupational therapist Laura Petix, from The OT Butterfly and author of The Sensory Code. We talk about how parents can better understand their child’s unique sensory needs, recognize what may be happening underneath challenging behavior and big emotions, and respond with more empathy and less frustration. Laura also shares practical ways we as parents can help accommodate our child’s sensory issues while empowering them to help themselves.