Stop Shrinking Yourself: When Being Good started to Mean Being Small

Get on Kamden's wait list for The HOLIDAY GAME PLAN:  a three-day holiday planning workshop for the ADHD brain. kamdenadhdcoaching.com/holidays There's a unique intersection of ADHD, womanhood, midlife, and navigating life as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Hormonal shifts, midlife transitions, and menopause affect our faith, feelings, and daily life. Kamden walks through eight questions she’d want answered if she were just discovering ADHD through the lens of faith: -Does understanding your brain turn faith from a source of shame into relief? -How do you keep track of callings and commitments without feeling like a failure? -Why does “just pray harder” keep coming up, and how do you tell spiritual guidance from self-criticism? -How do you explain ADHD to family, your bishop, or Relief Society sisters without justifying yourself? -Is there space in your congregation to talk openly about mental health? -How do you honor motherhood while your own needs, creativity, and work matter too? -How do you stop comparing your inner experience to other women’s outward appearance? -What does it look like to draw close to God as the person you actually are?

In this episode, host and ADHD coach Kamden Hainsworth dives into the concept of the "ADHD tax"—the hidden financial, emotional, physical, and energetic costs that result from executive dysfunction. Opening with a candid story about an impulsive splurge on an upcycled Moroccan carpet jacket, Kamden breaks down how brain wiring, dysregulated nervous systems, and decision fatigue drive impulsive behaviors, avoidance, and burnout. Examples include overspending, forgotten subscriptions, mail avoidance leading to late fees, and depleted energy from late-night scrolling, gaming, or gambling-like dopamine cycles. Rather than viewing these patterns as personal flaws, Kamden reframes them through the lens neuroplasticity and self-compassion. 00:00 Welcome Busy Brains 00:40 Moroccan Jacket Story 02:28 Ethical ADHD Marketing 03:59 What Is ADHD Tax 05:40 Impulse Spending Triggers 06:39 Costco Self Control Hack 10:14 Decision Fatigue Parenting 12:55 Hidden Fees And Avoidance 15:27 Energy And Sleep Costs 16:27 Health And Meal Planning 18:26 Neuroplasticity And Tools 22:06 You Are Not Broken 23:04 Closing And Community

You’ve been doing it “right” for years. Reading every day. Journaling. Checking the box. But somewhere along the way, a gift became a test—and you started performing your faith instead of living it. For Kamden, 20 years of daily scripture study created a powerful habit and a crushing belief: If I read, God loves me. If I don’t, I’m failing. In this deeply honest episode, Kamden unpacks:

You see their genius. You see their creativity. You see their potential. But you're also exhausted by their inconsistency, missed deadlines, and broken promises—even though you know they're capable. Here's the truth: ADHD is a disorder of doing, not knowing. Your employee isn't lazy, careless, or untrustworthy. Their prefrontal cortex doesn't break down tasks or manage emotions the way neurotypical brains do. And they've probably never learned how. In this episode, Kamden breaks down:

Are you living by rules you didn't choose, or are you authoring your own life? In this episode, Kamden explores the powerful concept of self-authoring—moving beyond letting other people's perceptions define who you are and stepping into intentional choice about your identity, values, and how you live. Drawing from insights shared by Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, Kamden examines Matthew 5:28 and what Christ's higher standard really means for people with ADHD. It's not about checking boxes or following external rules—it's about developing true self-mastery by learning to exercise restraint and agency in alignment with your own values. You'll discover: