Q&A: Raising a Gentleman with a Backbone

In this episode of Raising Men, host Shaun Dawson sits down with Dr. Carla Caturia, elite mental performance coach and founder of The House of RISE. She's back for a short follow-up on helping young athletes handle pressure, and it starts with her own story. Carla played varsity basketball, and her dad had coached her since she was born. When a younger, better teammate arrived, the pressure from her coach, her dad and herself got to be too much, and she quit. Today she teaches kids the tools she never had. First, notice what your inner critic is saying. Then get back to neutral after a mistake by simply observing the shot. Shaun shares how that same detachment turned golf from a misery into a chess match for him. You'll walk away with a simple way to help your son judge himself less, enjoy the game more and count the real wins. Key Takeaways Kids carry pressure much earlier than they used to. A nine-year-old can be running the schedule Carla had in high school, and parents who say they never push can still create that pressure by filling every afternoon. Start by asking what he was thinking. When a boy throws his racket or falls apart after one strikeout, help him name what his inner critic was saying in that moment. Aim for neutral before positive. After a mistake, skip "that was terrible" and simply observe it: "Wow, that was a shot." Positive self-talk comes later, once he truly believes in himself. Focus on what he can control. The same swing can pop up, strike out or clear the fence, so put his attention on the process and the present moment instead of the outcome. Redefine the win. Did he play better than last time, or stay calm when he usually wouldn't? Carla calls those the real wins, and says the trophy is the icing on the cake. "The championship win, or just the W period, is like the icing on the cake. It really is: did I come out here better than I did last time?" - Dr. Carla Caturia

In this episode of Raising Men, host Shaun Dawson sits down with Dr. Samuel Latimer, a clinical and social psychologist and founder of Fostering Growth and Cooperation. Together they ask what ancient wisdom can teach modern parents about raising boys who feel needed. Dr. Samuel draws on traditional societies like the Maya, who bring toddlers into household chores from the very start. Shaun shares how teaching his son golf only worked once he stopped coaching and started playing alongside him. They talk through co-sleeping, picky eating, and why natural consequences often teach more than taking away a phone. The thread through all of it is simple. Boys grow strong when they have a real job in the family today. Big plans for later can wait. You'll walk away with practical ways to invite your son into the work of your home, and a fresh look at which modern habits are worth questioning. Key Takeaways Give your son a real job in the house now. Dr. Samuel sees young men leaving for college who can't manage laundry or dishes, and he traces it to boys who were never needed at home. Say yes when the little ones grab the broom. Two, three and four year olds want to help, and the Maya treat that urge as worth years of patience, even when the job gets done badly. Correct less than you think you should. Shaun's golf outings with his son only clicked once he stopped instructing and simply played beside him, letting him learn by watching and trying. Let natural consequences do some of the teaching. Taking away a phone is a manufactured consequence. Roaches in a kitchen nobody cleaned is a natural one, and kids connect to what is happening right now. Ask whether a modern rule is wisdom or just habit. Shaun and his wife questioned why their son had to sleep alone, learned co-sleeping is the historical norm, and he still grew up remarkably independent. "We expect too much independence of our toddlers and little ones, but too much dependence of our teenagers." - Dr. Samuel Latimer

In this episode of Raising Men, host Shaun Dawson sits down with Geoff Owen, founder of Aligned Parenting and author of The Parenting Assumption, to test-drive his new AI parenting agent. Built on Biologically Aligned Parenting, the agent gives parents somewhere to turn when a hard moment hits at 11 o'clock at night. Shaun brings a real one. His four-year-old daughter is warm and close when it's just the two of them, then pushes him away the moment her mom is home. Geoff reads that behavior as a signal about what she needs from her environment. He explains benign authority, the steady place a parent stands no matter what a child says. Shaun also owns a moment he missed on the morning they recorded, when his daughter asked for breakfast and he answered from his office. You'll learn why rudeness doesn't always need correcting, and why answering promptly matters so much. Key Takeaways Read difficult behavior as a signal. Geoff asks what's missing from the child's environment, and what you can supply so the behavior stops being necessary. Stand in benign authority. That's Geoff's term for the calm, settled place a parent stands no matter what a child says or does, and your child depends on you to hold it. You don't have to answer every rude moment. Keep providing the right environment and carry on, and over time the behavior starts to settle. It isn't your child's job to confirm you're a good parent. If a four-year-old's words wound you, ask why you've handed her that power. When your child calls and the task can wait, stop and go to them. "In a minute" doesn't make sense to a young child, and being close beats shouting down the stairs. "It's not her job to confirm your ability and success as a parent." - Geoff Owen

In this episode of Raising Men, host Shaun Dawson sits down with Ryan Riley, an entrepreneur, TEDx speaker and author of the Books for Boys character and leadership series. Ryan explains how boys drift before they collapse, and how parents can catch emotional withdrawal early. He defines drift simply: change outpacing our awareness. Shaun and Ryan talk about why so many dads struggle to find connection, and why pushing an 18-year-old out the door can set him up to fail. Ryan is a father of five, and he shares the hard lesson of a family crisis he didn't see coming. He walks through his model of moving from daddy to mentor to peer, and explains why being your teenager's friend backfires. There's also a $300 toilet paper story you won't forget. You'll walk away with practical ways to stay present, make small corrections early and be the anchor your son can count on. Key Takeaways Ryan defines drift as change outpacing your awareness. Drift is neutral in itself. It only becomes dangerous when it goes on long enough that you're left reacting instead of choosing. Parent the way you drive a car, with a light hand on the wheel. Small, steady corrections keep things smooth, while noticing late leads to the panicked overcorrection that causes the crash. Be an anchor. An anchor sits in the mud at the bottom and doesn't move, and your son needs to know you're that constant presence when he needs you. Move from daddy to mentor, and later to peer, rather than to friend. A mentor is someone your son calls for help, listens to for advice, and who lets him make mistakes without judging him. Set your son up for success long before he turns 18. A standing promise like "call me, no questions asked" only works in a crisis if you said it a thousand times before he needed it. "I define drift as when change outpaces our awareness." - Ryan Riley

In this episode of Raising Men, host Shaun Dawson sits down with Tiffany Braxton, author of Consent Comics, for her third conversation on the show. After the news out of Cornell, Shaun wanted help talking with kids about consent without getting pulled into the culture war. Tiffany shares how she talked it through with her 12-year-old son, and why it was easy. It was one more chapter in a conversation they had been having for years. She also tells the story of her 15-year-old daughter waiting alone after a festival, and why she told her that feeling vulnerable was a good thing. Shaun opens up about a night in his twenties when he almost stood by and did nothing. Together they talk about pressure, good faith, and teaching boys to step in. You'll leave with simple ways to start these talks at any age, from seven to seventeen. Key Takeaways