Show Notes
They may look fine. They may smile, work and carry on with life. But they could be living with chronic pain that you will never see. September is Pain Awareness Month, and I'm asking us to look beyond the surface—and start asking better questions. What if the person who just told you “I'm fine” isn't actually fine? In this short but important episode of The Michele Roys Show, I'm asking us to have a different conversation about chronic pain and invisible illness. Because sometimes the person standing beside you looks completely fine. They're smiling. They're working. They're getting on with life. But underneath the surface, they may be carrying chronic pain, fatigue, disability, autoimmune illness or an invisible condition that you simply cannot see. I know this because I live it too. In this episode, I share what fatigue can actually feel like when you're living with chronic pain—and why saying “I'm fine” can sometimes be easier than trying to explain what's really happening inside your body. Why invisible pain is so difficult for others to understand
What it can feel like to live with chronic pain and fatigue
Why people with invisible illnesses often “mask” how they're feeling
How friends, family and colleagues can ask better questions
Why curiosity can create understanding instead of judgement
How workplaces can better support people living with chronic pain or disability
Why we need more empathy, kindness and open conversations
And most importantly, why nobody living with chronic pain should feel like they have to carry it alone
One of the biggest messages I want to leave you with is this: Sometimes we judge because someone “looks fine.” But we don't know what's happening underneath. So this Pain Awareness Month, I'm inviting you to ask instead of assume. Ask your friend: “How are you actually doing?” Ask: “Is there anything I can do to help?” And if you are the person living with chronic pain or invisible illness, you don't have to explain everything—but if you feel safe and comfortable, tell people a little more about what you're experiencing. Because sometimes people don't lack care. They simply lack understanding. And when we open the conversation, we can create more empathy, connection, support and community.
What is one thing you wish other people understood about living with chronic pain or invisible illness? Share it in the comments. Your answer might help someone else feel seen and understood today. And if you know someone living with chronic pain, fatigue or an invisible illness, send them this episode. Sometimes knowing that somebody sees you is more powerful than we realise.
I'm also celebrating the audiobook launch of my memoir: But You Look Just Fine: My Journey to Rediscover Joy Amidst Chronic Pain and Invisible Illness 📅 24 September 2026 ⏰ 7 PM Irish time 💻 Live on Zoom Come and celebrate with us as we mark Pain Awareness Month, bring our community together and make the invisible visible. 👉 Register here: EVENTBRITE LINK
Subscribe to The Michele Roys Show for honest conversations about chronic pain, invisible illness, resilience, faith, hope and rediscovering joy—even when life doesn't go according to plan. #PainAwarenessMonth #ChronicPain #InvisibleIllness #ChronicIllness #PainAwareness #DisabilityAwareness #ChronicPainAwareness #InvisibleDisability #TheMicheleRoysShow #ButYouLookJustFine We talk about:You don't have to understand someone's pain to believe them.You are not alone.💬 I want to hear from you:📖 My audiobook launches September 24
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What if the diagnosis that changed your life didn't have to define the rest of it? At 27, Amy Behimer was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. It wasn't her first autoimmune diagnosis either. She had already been living with vitiligo and Graves' disease, and suddenly she was facing a future she never expected. Her first thought? "My life will always be worse now." But Amy didn't stop there.In this honest conversation we talk about what it means to grieve the person you thought you were going to be, live with an invisible illness, and find a new way forward without pretending everything is fine. Amy shares how she learned to control the controllables, focusing on what she can influence while accepting what she cannot. We talk about: Being diagnosed with MS at 27, on top of two other autoimmune conditionsThe grief that comes with a life-changing diagnosis Living with invisible illness and looking fine while struggling inside Redefining what health actually means Everyday habits that support wellbeing, food, movement, rest and mindsetWhy your health habits don't need to be perfect Creating a daily "date with yourself"One of my favourite moments is when Amy says, "Different is good." Sometimes the life we didn't plan for teaches us to live more intentionally. If you're living with chronic illness, autoimmune disease, or simply trying to make healthier changes, I think there is something here for you. 💬 What is one thing in your life you need to stop fighting and start accepting, and what is one thing you can control? Tell me in the comments. 📖 Connect with Amy 🎙️ Autoimmune Health Secrets Podcast 📱 Instagram: Amy Behimer Coaching 🌐 amybehimercoaching.com 🎧 Listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you get your podcasts #MultipleSclerosis #AutoimmuneDisease #InvisibleIllness #ChronicIllness #TheMicheleRoysShow #MSWarrior #InvisibleIllnessAwareness
My audiobook launches tomorrow. And this week, I got overwhelmed. Not with the recording. Not with the editing. But with everything else it takes to bring an event like this together. Invites, registrations, the host, the guests, a hundred small moving pieces all at once. I had to sit down with my journal and ask myself honestly, Shelly, what's going on with you? And it brought me back to something I have learned again and again on this journey. The power of small things. When I set out to write my book, the whole idea felt too big to hold. So I broke it down to 250 words a day. Those small words compounded into 117,000 words, later trimmed through editing. The same thing happened this week with the launch. I could not send a thousand invites at once, but I could send ten. I could not do everything, but I could do one small thing that moved the needle forward. In this episode I talk honestly about getting overwhelmed, what helped me come back from it, and why small, doable steps matter more than we give them credit for, whether you are healing from chronic pain, working toward a goal, or just trying to get through a hard week. My audiobook launches tomorrow. If you have not registered yet, its free, the link isbelow: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/but-you-look-just-fine-audiobook-launch-celebration-with-andrea-hayes-tickets-1998429646870?aff=oddtdtcreator 💬 What is one small thing you are going to do for yourself this week? Tell me in the comments. 📖 But You Look Just Fine: micheleroys.com 🎧 Listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you get your podcasts #PainAwarenessMonth #ChronicPain #InvisibleIllness #TheMicheleRoysShow #SmallSteps #Kaizen #ChronicIllnessCommunity