How to Run Effective Meetings - For Every Personality Type

“I want to talk to you about your timekeeping. You’re always coming in late at the moment.” If someone said that to you, what would your first reaction be? For most of us, it’s something like: “What do you mean, always? That’s not fair.” And just like that, the conversation has gone sideways. In this episode of The Leaders Kitbag, I build on the previous episode about sharing feedback; if you’ve not seen it, you can watch or listen here. One of the biggest worries I hear from leaders and managers when they need to have a difficult conversation is: what if they argue back? What if they get defensive or emotional? Very often, we trigger that reaction ourselves. Not through what we say, but through how vague we are when we say it. I explain how to have a difficult conversation without putting the other person on the defensive, what specific feedback looks like in practice, and why not having a specific example might tell you something important about the feedback itself. Because vague feedback might feel easier to give. But specific feedback is far easier to receive. In this episode, you will learn: Why vague feedback triggers a defensive reaction How words like “always”, “never” and “a bit” pull a difficult conversation away from the behaviour What specific, observable feedback sounds like, with a practical example Why opening with a question rather than a verdict changes the whole conversation What to do when you don’t have a specific example to point to A simple way to prepare before you have your next difficult conversation

In this episode of The Leaders Kitbag, I want to pick up somewhere most conversations about feedback stop: the moment after someone's taken it on board and actually improved. I was coaching a senior leader recently. She had a team member whose performance wasn't where it needed to be. She'd tried giving feedback before, nothing really changed, and she'd been putting off having the conversation again. Sound familiar? We talked through how to approach it. She had the conversation. And when we next caught up, she told me it had gone well; the person's performance had genuinely improved. But here's the bit I want to focus on, because it's the part most leaders skip. I challenged her to go further: to accentuate the progress, reaffirm what the person was now doing well, and actively look for the chance to ‘catch them doing things right.’ As leaders, we're naturally wired to focus on what's wrong. That's most of the job: spotting the gap and closing it. Which means it's easy to miss what's going well, especially straight after a difficult conversation. So put yourself in the employee's shoes for a second. You've been told something isn't good enough. You've taken it on board. You've worked hard to change it. And your boss says... nothing. Or a cursory “thanks.” What's that likely to do to your motivation? For a lot of people, it's “I did what you asked, and I got zero recognition for it.” That's not a leader building trust. That's a leader quietly undoing the progress they just fought to get. In this episode, you will learn: Why a feedback conversation can stall even after it's gone well The habit that quietly undoes the progress you've just fought to get Why leaders are wired to spot problems rather than progress How to reinforce change so it actually sticks The one specific thing to do this week when someone acts on feedback you've given them

How to Be Heard in Meetings as an Internal Thinker Have you ever left a meeting thinking, I didn't say enough? Maybe everyone else seemed to be talking, and you sat there processing, listening, staying fairly quiet. If that's you, this episode is about how to be heard in meetings, even if you're not the type who talks the most. In this episode of The Leaders Kitbag, I look at why quiet, internal thinkers often add more value than it seems, and what to do about it if you want people to actually notice. In my coaching and leadership workshops, I hear this all the time from people who process internally rather than externally. They worry that the people who speak up a lot in meetings are the ones getting ahead, the ones with their boss's ear. So, here's a question worth asking: Are they actually getting ahead? Or does it just look that way? There's a difference between talking a lot and adding value. Once you understand which type of processor you are, you can work out how to speak more in meetings without changing who you are. In this episode, you will learn: Why internal and external processors approach meetings so differently Why it's easy to mistake volume for value in a meeting A simple approach for how to be heard in meetings without dominating the conversation A practical way to speak more in meetings, even if it doesn't come naturally to you How consistently applying this approach changes the way people see you

Leadership Availability vs Productivity If you've ever promised yourself you'd switch your phone off for an hour, only to find your hand reaching for it ten minutes later, this episode is for you. In this episode of The Leaders Kitbag, I explore why being unavailable, something most leaders find genuinely uncomfortable, might be one of the most useful things you can do for your team. We've all had the moment where we picture switching off and our brain goes straight to the risk. What if my boss needs me? What if my team hits a problem and can't reach me? That fear is real. But it's only looking at one side of the equation. Because there's an upside to being unavailable that goes well beyond you getting your own work done. Without meaning to, a lot of us have trained our teams to come straight to us the moment a problem arises, which makes us the bottleneck and keeps us constantly interrupted. When you're genuinely not reachable, your team has to work things out for themselves. I share why that pattern needs breaking, and a simple experiment you can run this week to find out what actually happens when you switch off properly. In this episode, you will learn: Why it takes so long to mentally refocus after a distraction, and what that costs your day How constant availability can quietly train your team to stop thinking for themselves The two hidden costs of always being the one with the answer Why short periods of genuine unavailability can make your team more resourceful A simple experiment to test what happens when you properly switch off for an hour

Over the next few weeks, a lot of us will be packing the work bag for the last time before heading off on holiday. And if you're a leader, there's a good chance you'll be carrying a quiet, nagging worry alongside the suncream and the out-of-office: what's going to happen while I'm gone? In this episode of The Leaders Kitbag, I explore why how your team performs in your absence tells you more about your leadership than almost anything they do while you're stood watching. I take you back to my second tour of Iraq, when a period of leave landed me away from my team during the busiest, most volatile stretch of the entire deployment. What I found when I got back taught me something I still talk about today: one of the real tests of your leadership isn't how things run when you're in the room. It's how they run when you're not. A lot of leaders read a smooth-running team the wrong way. When things tick along fine without them, it can feel uncomfortable - almost like a sign they're not needed. It's the opposite. A team that performs well in your absence is a sign you've trained, developed and supported them well enough that they don't depend on you being there. I share a few simple, practical things you can do now to set your team up to succeed while you're away, so you can actually switch off on holiday - and come back to find things went brilliantly without you. In this episode, you will learn: Why how your team performs in your absence is one of the clearest tests of your leadership Why a smoothly running team while you're away is a sign of strength, not a threat The warning sign to watch for if things fall apart the moment you step back Practical steps to prepare your team before you go on leave How to actually switch off on holiday without worrying about work