Show Notes
You've done it all—IVF, IUI, every possible fertility treatment. You've spent years hoping, praying, and planning for a baby that never arrived. Now, you find yourself in a place you never prepared for—life without the children you dreamed of. And you keep asking yourself, So now what? If those words have been circling in your mind, you are not alone. I remember when they consumed me. When I was told my only frozen embryo wasn't viable, I was convinced I had failed at everything. I believed I had let my husband down, that I had cheated my in-laws out of becoming grandparents, and that I would grow old alone, pitied by everyone. Most of all, I believed that my life would never feel full again because I didn't become a mother. But what if those beliefs aren't actually true? In this episode, I'm giving you a sneak peek into So Now What?, my upcoming book that I have poured my heart into. It's not just words on a page—it's a guide, a companion, and an invitation to create a life you love, even though it looks nothing like what you expected. Today, we're talking about something that changed everything for me: your beliefs. Are Your Beliefs Holding You Back? The way you see yourself, your future, and your worth is shaped by what you believe. And most of the time, we don't even realize how much our thoughts are controlling our reality. Do you believe that because you didn't become a mom, you'll never experience deep love? Do you believe your marriage is doomed without children? Do you believe that you'll always be on the outside looking in while your friends celebrate milestones with their families? If you've been carrying these beliefs, it's not your fault. Society, family, religion, and the stories we've been told about what makes a woman's life meaningful have shaped them. But here's the truth: just because you've believed something for a long time doesn't make it true. I want you to start questioning the beliefs that have been keeping you stuck. Who told you these things had to be true? What if they aren't? Rewriting Your Story When I first realized that my beliefs were shaping my happiness (or in my case, my deep sadness), I had to do the uncomfortable work of questioning them. I had to ask myself: If I wasn't a failure, then what? If my life wasn't actually over, what could it look like? If I didn't let my husband down, what was still possible for us? These questions were scary, but they were the key to setting myself free. They were the key to creating a life that, while different from what I imagined, is still full, meaningful, and beautiful. In So Now What?, I walk you through exactly how I did this. How I stopped letting these outdated beliefs define me. How I learned to see myself in a new light. How I discovered that I was still whole, still worthy, and still capable of creating a future that felt deeply fulfilling. And if this episode has you realizing that you've been carrying beliefs that no longer serve you, let's talk. Join Me for a Free Thrive Call Maybe no one has ever offered you 45 minutes of their time, free of charge, to help you start creating a plan for your next chapter. But I do. During our Thrive Call, we will: ✅ Look at the beliefs that have been keeping you stuck ✅ Create a plan for what comes next ✅ Start shifting your mindset so you can move forward in a way that feels real and authentic to you You don't have to keep feeling like your life is over. You don't have to stay in this place of uncertainty and grief. There is another way forward, and I'd love to help you take that first step. Schedule your free Thrive Call here. Win a Free Signed Copy of So Now What? I am beyond excited for this book to be in your hands, and I want to give 10 lucky listeners a signed copy for free! Enter the giveaway now: Enter to win here. Resources Mentioned in This Episode: 📖 So Now What? (Available April 2) – Preorder coming soon! 📞 Book a Free Thrive Call: Click here 📥 Download The Top 27 T
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Childless After Infertility? You Still Belong If you've ever felt like everyone else moved forward after IVF while you were left trying to figure out where you fit… this episode is for you. In Episode 205 of The "So Now What?" Podcast, Lana Manikowski shares a deeply personal recap of The Other's Day® weekend in Chicago, where women from 13 states gathered for connection, friendship, healing, and belonging after infertility and childlessness. But this episode is about much more than a weekend event. It's about what happens when you stop seeing yourself as the outsider. You'll hear honest conversation about the emotional aftermath of infertility, the loneliness many women experience after fertility treatments end without a baby, and why so many women quietly question who they are now once the future they imagined never happened. Lana shares: • Why Mother's Day weekend can feel emotionally exhausting when you are childless not by choice. • The hidden identity shifts that happen after IVF failed. • How infertility impacts friendships, marriage, confidence, and connection. • What it was like watching women who once felt disconnected instantly connect during The Other's Day® celebrations. • Why you already belong, even if motherhood didn't happen. • The emotional experience of meeting Thrive After Infertility clients in person after years of coaching together online. • Why healing is not about becoming someone different, but reconnecting to yourself and your life again. • How women are building meaningful, connected, joy-filled lives after infertility. This episode is for you if: • You feel disconnected from friends after infertility. • Mother's Day still feels hard after IVF failed. • You wonder where you fit now that fertility treatments are over. • You are struggling to picture a meaningful future without children. • You want to feel connected, grounded, and hopeful again. You are not broken. You are not behind. And you do not have to keep navigating this alone. ✨ Mentioned in this episode: Join the waitlist for The Other's Day® 2027 in Chicago (May 7–8, 2027): The Other's Day® Waitlist Participate in the confidential Northwestern University research study for women whose fertility treatment ended without a live birth: Northwestern Fertility Treatment Research Study Schedule a free Thrive Call with Lana: Book a Thrive Call Download the free guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You're Childless and How to Respond Get the Free Guide Here Learn more about Thrive After Infertility Connect with Lana on Instagram: Instagram @lana.manikowski
Belonging When You're Infertile and Childless What happens when fertility treatments end and there's no baby? It's a question that rarely gets discussed in the infertility world, yet it's the reality so many women face after IVF fails, fertility treatments end, or you make the painful decision to stop trying. In this episode of The "So Now What?" Podcast, I'm sharing the exact speech I recently gave at the Seeds of Hope Fertility Luncheon. What made this event especially powerful is that many women in the room ultimately became mothers after infertility. Their stories looked different than mine, but so many came up to me afterward and said: "I've never thought about what happens when fertility treatment ends without a baby." And that's exactly why this conversation matters. If you're infertile and childless, navigating life after IVF failed, or trying to figure out how to rebuild your identity when motherhood didn't happen, this episode will remind you that you still belong. In this episode, you'll hear: • Why there's a major gap in fertility care when treatment ends without a live birth. • Details about the new research study I'm supporting with Northwestern University focused on women whose fertility treatments ended without a baby. • Why being handed brochures for adoption, donor eggs, or more treatment is not the same as actual support. • The friendship brunch moment that made me question whether I still belonged. • Why so many women feel like motherhood is what makes them feel relevant or included in adulthood. • How one of my clients stopped disappearing from her own life after infertility. • Why creating new traditions and redefining your future matters when motherhood is no longer part of your path. • Why I created The Other's Day® for women who need a place to belong around Mother's Day. • How to stop waiting for life to begin and start creating a life you feel proud of. Your story may not look like what you planned. That does not make your life any less meaningful. And it absolutely does not make you any less worthy of belonging. Links Mentioned in This Episode Participate in the Northwestern Research Study This anonymous survey is open worldwide for women whose fertility treatments ended without a live birth. It takes about 20 minutes. https://redcap.nubic.northwestern.edu/redcap/surveys/?s=LM4TX4MJN3HRR7ER Get Tickets to The Other's Day® (May 8–9 in Chicago) Friday: The Foundation (yoga, guided meditation + sound bath) Saturday: The Other's Day® Brunch Attend one event or both. https://lanamanikowski.com/othersday Read Chapter 1 of "So Now What?" https://lana-manikowski.myflodesk.com/chapter1 Buy "So Now What?" https://www.lanamanikowski.com/book Free Guide: Top 27 Things People Say When You're Childless https://lana-manikowski.myflodesk.com/thingspeoplesay Book a Thrive Call https://calendly.com/lanamanikowski/strategy-session Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lana.manikowski/ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@lana.manikowski YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@lana.manikowski
If you've ever felt like friendships got harder after infertility, you're not imagining it. When IVF failed and your life didn't include children, you didn't just lose the dream of motherhood. You also lost the built-in ways friendships often form. No school drop-offs. No sports schedules. No automatic community. So now you're left wondering… how do you actually make meaningful friendships as a childless woman? In this episode, you hear a real, honest conversation about what it looks like to create connection when your life doesn't follow the traditional path. 💛 What You'll Learn in This Episode Why friendships can feel more complicated when you're childless after infertility