S3E22 - Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Why Kids' Brains Work Differently in Therapy

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose six-year-old can be cooperative one minute and completely defiant the next. I explain why behavior like refusing to get in the car, undoing something positive after being praised, or digging in when asked to do something is often less about "bad behavior" and more about a child's need for power and control. When we understand what is driving the behavior, we can respond differently instead of getting pulled into the power struggle. I also share how intentional choice giving can help children feel more empowered throughout the day, even when the actual expectation is not negotiable. I walk through what that can look like in a real-life situation like getting into the car, why staying calm and neutral matters, and why encouragement is more helpful than praise when we want children to develop confidence, responsibility, and internal motivation. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose 3- and 5-year-old children are constantly tattling on each other over every little thing. I explain why telling young children to "work it out" usually doesn't work—they simply don't have the developmental capacity yet to reason through sibling conflict on their own. Instead, I share how parents can use clear, consistent choices to help children begin developing self-control and responsibility without turning Mom or Dad into the household referee. I also talk about the importance of keeping consequences immediate and age-appropriate, especially with very young children, and why the parent's tone matters just as much as the limit itself. The goal is not to punish children for tattling, but to help them learn that their choices have outcomes and that they can begin taking more responsibility for how they handle minor sibling conflicts. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose 7- and 9-year-old daughters are experiencing significant anxiety around going to school. We talk about the difference between choosing homeschooling because it genuinely fits a child better versus using homeschooling to avoid an anxiety-producing situation, and why that distinction matters. I also explain how anxiety can show up physically through things like stomachaches or behaviorally through crying, clinging, and refusing to enter school, and how those patterns can grow over time if the underlying fear isn't addressed. I also talk about the importance of involving anxious children in major decisions that affect them. Kids with anxiety tend to do better with predictability, clear expectations, and some sense of control, so whether a family chooses traditional school, homeschooling, or a hybrid option, communication and buy-in matter. The goal is not simply to eliminate discomfort, but to make a thoughtful decision about what environment will help the child thrive while also addressing the anxiety itself. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a follow-up question from a mom who recently reduced screen time for her 8- and 10-year-old children and is now seeing an unexpected result: her son wants to spend much more time outside with friends. That is a huge win, but it has created a new parenting challenge—how much freedom and independence should a 10-year-old actually have? I talk through ways to gradually increase independence without ignoring legitimate safety concerns, including starting with one approved activity, setting clear expectations, and allowing children to earn greater freedom by demonstrating responsibility. I also discuss why there is no single age when every child is suddenly ready to roam independently. The neighborhood, the friends involved, the child's maturity, the ability to communicate with you, and your own comfort level all matter. The goal is not to eliminate every possible risk or give children unlimited freedom, but to find a balance where they can practice independence while knowing that increased freedom comes with increased responsibility. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose seven-year-old has become frustrated with her play therapist and says the therapist treats her "like a baby." I explain why seven is still right in the sweet spot for child-centered play therapy, and why complaints about therapy are often less about the therapist or the approach and more about the child's resistance to doing difficult emotional work. Children don't always have the words to explain what they are feeling, so we have to listen beyond the complaint and consider what it may actually be communicating. I also talk about why resistance can look very different from one child to another—avoiding eye contact, refusing to enter the playroom, calling therapy boring, or saying the therapist is annoying—and why that doesn't necessarily mean therapy is a bad fit. Sometimes resistance is simply a sign that something important is being stirred up. Rather than rushing to change approaches, I encourage parents to trust the process, give their child time, and remember that meaningful therapeutic work often requires courage before a child is ready to fully engage. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.