
Show Notes
In this episode of Raising Men, Shaun Dawson sits down with Liz Ortenburger, CEO of SafeNest, Nevada's largest non-profit addressing domestic and sexual violence, to navigate some of the most daunting topics facing parents today. Together, they confront the reality of early digital exposure and pornography, discussing how accidental access impacts developing adolescent brains and skews expectations around intimacy. Liz offers a refreshing, proactive perspective, urging parents to replace shame and avoidance with early, open conversations. Moving beyond traditional masculine stereotypes, Liz and Shaun examine how fathers, coaches, and mentors can guide boys to evolve from the historical expectations of protecting and providing into becoming true partners in their relationships. Key Takeaways Teach Kids to Swim, Don't Just Build Fences: Digital filters alone cannot stop pornography exposure; parents must actively educate children early so they can navigate accidental exposure with critical thinking instead of shame. Shift from Protect and Provide to Partner: Modern masculinity requires expanding traditional roles to teach young men how to build healthy, equal, and collaborative partnerships with women. Role Models and Mentors Matter: While parental shame pushes boys into secrecy, constructive accountability from respected mentors, coaches, and peer circles effectively redirects harmful behaviors. Uncorrected Behavior Is Condoned Behavior: In youth environments like sports locker rooms, unaddressed misogynistic or harmful banter is perceived by developing brains as approved behavior. Value Diversity of Experience: True cultural progress and healthy environments require valuing individual life journeys and diverse perspectives rather than relying on rigid categorical metrics. "If you are not having the conversation with your kids, Pornhub is having it for you." — Liz Ortenburger
"What does not get corrected gets condoned." — Liz Ortenburger
"We have to start teaching young boys how to protect, provide, and partner." — Liz Ortenburger00:00:00 - Unannounced Mom Knocking Teaser 00:00:25 - Guest Intro Liz Ortunburger 00:02:23 - Modern Evolution of Pornography 00:04:26 - Brain Development and Addiction 00:07:48 - Avoiding Shame in Conversations 00:11:00 - Guiding Healthy Youth Development 00:14:05 - Value of Male Role Models 00:17:46 - Shaping Locker Room Culture 00:20:20 - Extreme Consequences of Ignorance 00:23:30 - Protecting Providing and Partnering 00:28:40 - Modeling Healthy Adult Relationships 00:35:45 - Safe Nest Contact Info Books, Links and Frameworks Mentioned SafeNest: Nevada's largest non-profit addressing domestic and sexual violence https://safenest.org/ Scott Galloway: Bestselling author and statistician referenced for his writings on manhood (Notes on Being a Man) Mentorship Programs: Big Brothers Big Sisters, 100 Black Men, Gentlemen by Choice, Coaching Boys into Men Protect, Provide, and Partner: Framework for expanding traditional masculine development to include healthy, collaborative relationship skills Car Windshield Conversations: Tactical approach for discussing uncomfortable or sensitive topics with teens in low-pressure settings Liz Ortenburger on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/liz-ortenburger-9539aa32/
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In this episode of Raising Men, host Shaun Dawson sits down with Dr. Samuel Latimer, a clinical and social psychologist and founder of Fostering Growth and Cooperation. Together they ask what ancient wisdom can teach modern parents about raising boys who feel needed. Dr. Samuel draws on traditional societies like the Maya, who bring toddlers into household chores from the very start. Shaun shares how teaching his son golf only worked once he stopped coaching and started playing alongside him. They talk through co-sleeping, picky eating, and why natural consequences often teach more than taking away a phone. The thread through all of it is simple. Boys grow strong when they have a real job in the family today. Big plans for later can wait. You'll walk away with practical ways to invite your son into the work of your home, and a fresh look at which modern habits are worth questioning. Key Takeaways Give your son a real job in the house now. Dr. Samuel sees young men leaving for college who can't manage laundry or dishes, and he traces it to boys who were never needed at home. Say yes when the little ones grab the broom. Two, three and four year olds want to help, and the Maya treat that urge as worth years of patience, even when the job gets done badly. Correct less than you think you should. Shaun's golf outings with his son only clicked once he stopped instructing and simply played beside him, letting him learn by watching and trying. Let natural consequences do some of the teaching. Taking away a phone is a manufactured consequence. Roaches in a kitchen nobody cleaned is a natural one, and kids connect to what is happening right now. Ask whether a modern rule is wisdom or just habit. Shaun and his wife questioned why their son had to sleep alone, learned co-sleeping is the historical norm, and he still grew up remarkably independent. "We expect too much independence of our toddlers and little ones, but too much dependence of our teenagers." - Dr. Samuel Latimer
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