Social Skills Mastery

303: The Future You Doesn't Panic When the Invite Comes

Social Skills Mastery

Summary

As the holiday season approaches, many individuals experience anxiety over social gatherings and events. Susan Callender emphasizes the importance of envisioning one's future self to navigate these situations with confidence. She encourages listeners to picture the person they aspire to become, suggesting that this future self can help alleviate the stress associated with social interactions, such as office parties and family gatherings.

Callender draws parallels between personal development and architectural planning, stating that just as an architect must visualize a building before construction begins, individuals must define their future selves to effectively work towards their goals. She outlines practical steps to help listeners connect with their future selves, including visualizing a typical day in that person's life, making detailed plans for social situations, and actively engaging in small, outgoing behaviors to build confidence.

Research from UCLA supports the idea that people often view their future selves as strangers, making it challenging to invest in long-term goals. By familiarizing oneself with this future version, individuals can motivate themselves to take actions that align with their aspirations. Callender concludes by urging listeners to start this journey today, emphasizing that personal growth is a gradual process that requires consistent effort and self-reflection.

Show Notes

You already know who you want to be at the holiday party: relaxed, easy to talk to, and glad you went. In this episode, Susan Callender shows you how to start building that future self now, so you can accept invitations without panicking and show up as yourself at work and beyond. In this episode, Susan covers: Why most people drift instead of building the person they want to become What Hal Hershfield's research reveals about why your future self feels like a stranger Why your future self doesn't need a different personality Five ways to start building your future self today and every day This week's challenge: Write out your future self in two areas of your life, in full detail, then email Susan at [email protected] with the two areas you chose. Resources: Ready, Set, Mingle, the five-day holiday intensive: StatureExecutivePresence.com/Mingle Shatter Your Social Limits, Susan's free live training: StatureExecutivePresence.com/secret Website: StatureExecutivePresence.com Take the Social Friction Quiz: StatureExecutivePresence.com/Quiz Book a Social Strategy Session Website: StatureExecutivePresence.com Connect with Susan: Email: [email protected] LinkedIn: Instagram: TikTok

About Susan Callender Susan Callender is an Executive Presence Coach & Trainer, the founder of Stature Executive Presence (formerly Social Confidence Pro), and the host of the Social Skills Mastery Podcast, the #1 social confidence podcast for professionals. She's a TEDx speaker whose talk, "The New Etiquette," has been viewed more than 57,000 times, and she's served as a commentator on global protocol for CNN's Airport Network. Susan coaches Fortune 100 executives and works with professionals at organizations including Moderna, Vertex Pharmaceuticals, JPMorgan Chase, PwC, Deloitte, and Ernst & Young. She specializes in executive presence, social confidence, and high-end business etiquette for engineers, scientists, and professionals in finance, accounting, biotech, pharma, private equity, investment banking, and M&A. Susan created the Social Identity Shift Framework™, a six-phase method (Identity, Thought Management, Subconscious Reprogramming, Mental Rehearsal, Habit Architecture, and The Second Self) that helps introverted and socially anxious professionals build lasting executive presence. Based in Boston's Seaport, she coaches individual clients and corporate teams online across time zones. Keywords: Susan Callender, Stature Executive Presence, Social Skills Mastery Podcast, Social Identity Shift Framework™, executive presence coach, executive presence for introverts, social confidence at work, overcoming fear at work, fear of failure at work, fear of judgment, fear of rejection, imposter feelings, speaking up in meetings, career courage, loss aversion, spotlight effect, regret of inaction, Fear Ledger, Social Friction Quiz

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