You get to enjoy your life with Becs | mum of two, Head of Learning & coach

In her twenties, Jo had it all on paper: Colenso, Saatchi New York, flown from AKL to LDN just to pick up a camera, and more impressive stories for a Saturday BBQ than most. In this episode, Jo isn't afraid of saying the quiet part out loud: "I think I became addicted to being impressive." Jo and I talk about what happens when the career that built your identity stops being the thing that defines you. Then along came motherhood (a journey in itself), her role got restructured while she was on leave, and she had to rebuild who she was from somewhere other than a job title. We get into the nitty gritty: coming back from maternity leave to report to someone who used to report to her, the identity crisis of feeling replaceable at work, and why she eventually negotiated her way into a GM role on her own terms, working 9am to 3pm so she's the one doing school drop off and pick up. We also talk about: Why "where do you work?" can feel like the most annoying question in the room once you're a mum The moment she realised the best years of her career weren't actually behind her, just different Parenting out loud at work (and why some workplaces still make you feel like you need to sneak out for pick up) Reframing ambition from climbing the ladder to mastering your own life What "having it all" really means once you stop comparing yourself to everyone else's highlight reel

There's a version of "having it all" that gets sold to ambitious women, and then there's the version Elle actually lives. In this conversation, we get into the three months' leave she took with each baby, the chronic fatigue that eventually stopped forced her to slow down, and the mum guilt that's actually hitting harder now (years later) as her kids get old enough to ask why she's not the one at pickup. We talk identity, ambition, the sacrifices no one tells you about going in, and why she's still figuring out how to keep work out of home time (spoiler: it's hard). Elle's honest about what she'd do differently. She's just as honest about what she wouldn't change for anything. This one's about seasons, about what it costs to be the person everyone can rely on, and about choosing a career you love while your kids are only this little once. Listen if you've ever been sitting with your kids and felt half your brain still checking your inbox — and you're over pretending that pull isn't there.

From finding the glimmers in every day to naming her inner voice, Hannah proves that a life lived intentionally is a life lived well. And she carries this intention into the way she and her husband parent their three boys. Hannah now works full-time for ASB while her tradie husband prioritises time at home with their youngest, but this hasn't always been the set-up. Across three maternity leaves she's worked part-time, three days, four days, and got through the 2020 lockdowns with a toddler and a newborn, before landing on the arrangement that works for her family now. Her advice for anyone navigating a squiggly career: "You don't need to start at the beginning, you just need to find the right in." Hannah's own path proves it, dietitian, then marketing and PR, then charity partnerships, now community partnerships at ASB, where she recently helped bring the first Kids Can Glow Run to life. In this episode we also talk about the small daily glimmers that keep her going, the Fair Play cards she and her husband use to split the mental load, and what it's taken to rebuild her confidence since returning to a workplace that changed while she was on leave. Thank you for taking the time to listen to this episode! You can support the podcast by following, liking and sharing with a friend. Or find me on IG @haveitall.podcast

In her early 20s, Maxene was asked if she was planning on having kids soon, and actually passed over for roles because of the assumption that she would be. (Let's remember this is a completely illegal and highly inappropriate question to ask anyone!) When she became a mum, she was let go during her trial period because her child kept getting sick. Then, pregnant with her second, she asked for flexibility and was initially denied. Maxene and I reflect on the disappointment and injustice of it all and how that series of events led her to restart her business and go all in as a self-employed working parent.

After a beautiful year off with her first baby, Tamara was expecting more of the same second time around. But at 37 weeks pregnant with Zach, she found a lump in her breast and within days had a breast cancer diagnosis. Chemo started when Zach was two weeks old. Tamara Milne is a radiographer, a mum of three boys and the co-founder of Check Your Bits, a brand born from one of the most confronting years of her life. In this episode we talk about the reality of parenting a newborn and a toddler while going through cancer treatment, the grief of a maternity leave that looked nothing like the first, and the "mum guilt" that still lingers. We also get into what it's really like returning to work with chemo brain on top of the standard mum fog and going from the senior your team leaned on to the one who suddenly can't find the words. Tamara's perspective on self-advocacy, knowing your normal, and finding purpose on the other side of something really hard is the kind of conversation that stays with you long after you've finished listening. I really hope this one reaches NZ women far and wide, as a reminder to check your breasts and get to know what's normal for you. And if you want to grab Tamara's Check Your Bits body wash, head to checkyourbits.co.nz and use code PODLOVE for 15% off your order.