Love lessons and life hazards: Joey Zauzig on surviving and thriving

This week, I’m closing the chapter on Brutally Anna by talking about mile 20—of the New York City Marathon, yes, but also of life. I ran that race back in 2017, and the thing about a marathon is you always know how far you have left. In life, you don’t. And this year felt like mile 23 for me: mentally brutal, spiritually draining, career-wise confusing, and laced with the kind of disappointment that makes quitting look like relief. But pushing through reminded me that the breakthrough always comes after the part where you think you can’t keep going. I get into the messy middle of my career, how I’m retraining my brain, why I’m stepping back from podcasting for now, and why giving up the right things is sometimes the smartest, bravest way to get to your own finish line. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today’s episode, I’m talking about why I think the word “soulmate” is kind of bullshit—not because love isn’t real, but because we use that word to trap ourselves in relationships that aren’t actually right for us. I share how I once assigned the title “soulmate” to practically every man I dated in my twenties, what finally shifted when I met my husband, and why I now believe the strongest, healthiest relationships aren’t about fate or twin flames or being “meant to be”—they’re about two people choosing each other on purpose, every day, especially when life gets hard. I also get into how the soulmate label often keeps women stuck, why our culture rewards “pick me” behavior, and how the real work of love is not finding the missing half of your soul, but becoming whole yourself first. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week’s episode is about how I think I accidentally found the cure for doom-scrolling: doing nothing—on purpose. Lately I’ve been trying to detach from my phone because I realized that constant productivity and comparison are killing my joy. Somewhere along the way, “rest” got rebranded as “laziness,” especially for women, and I’m done with that. So instead of polishing hardware or checking off my to-do list, I’ve been wandering around HomeGoods, calling it meditation. I talk about how the obsession with progress keeps us on the hamster wheel of capitalism, how my dad can go on a 14-hour flight with nothing but his thoughts, and how learning to simply exist—to be gentle, unproductive, and occasionally stupid in the best way, might actually be the most radical kind of self-care. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, I talk about what it’s really been like trying to get pregnant after spending my entire twenties doing everything in my power not to. I share how I went from never tracking my period to obsessing over ovulation sticks and smiley faces, and how coming off Zoloft for the first time in years forced me to actually face my hormones head-on. I get into my PMDD, the endless trial-and-error of antidepressants, the small lifestyle changes that finally helped me feel stable again, and the deeply unsexy logistics of “timed sex.” Mostly, I wanted to be honest about how no one prepares you for how hard this process can be—or how much it messes with your sense of control. It’s equal parts confessional, fertility crash course, and reminder that wanting a baby doesn’t automatically make it easy to have one. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Somewhere along the way, we started believing that if no one saw it, it didn’t happen — that joy requires an audience and meaning needs proof. In this episode, I talk about the psychological cost of living life through a camera roll: how documenting our memories actually weakens them, how performance has replaced presence, and why so many of our “best days” — including my wedding — end up feeling hollow when we live them for others.