Episode 5: When You Don’t Feel Like Yourself: Returning to the Voice of Love

Philippians 3:8 + Salvation by Allegiance Alone by Matthew Bates We spend our lives surrounded by things competing to become our greatest treasure: success, comfort, reputation, relationships, possessions, even the desire for life to turn out the way we hoped. But St. Paul offers another way: “I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord” (Philippians 3:8). In this final episode of Still Becoming: Six Conversations about Spiritual Maturity, Lisa asks what it means not merely to believe in Jesus but to belong to Him. A recent conversation with new friends leads Lisa to a surprisingly difficult question: Why believe in a personal God? She reflects on the ways God has made Himself known through creation, answered prayer, Scripture, inexplicable peace, and ultimately through Jesus Himself. The Incarnation reveals a God who does not remain distant. He comes close because He desires to be known. Drawing from Matthew Bates’ exploration of the Greek word pistis, Lisa considers faith through the lens of allegiance: mental agreement, professed loyalty, and embodied faithfulness to Jesus as King. If Jesus is Lord, He doesn’t simply get a place in our lives while we decide whether He is doing a satisfactory job of making them better. He gets our allegiance. But what slowly erodes that allegiance? Isolation. Listening to lies about God and ourselves. Closing the door on God’s voice while opening the door to doubt. Self-pity. Making comfort one of our highest goals. Filling our lives so completely that we have little room left for prayer. The question becomes deeply practical: Does the way I actually live reveal that Jesus is my supreme treasure? Our calendars, attention, money, fears, habits, and choices all reveal something about what we value most. Spiritual maturity does not mean we never become distracted or start chasing the wrong things. It means we keep returning. We keep recalibrating. We keep learning to receive the good gifts of this life without asking them to give us what only Jesus can give. Because the treasure is not simply faith, Christianity, or even spiritual maturity. The treasure is Jesus. Key ScripturePhilippians 3:8. I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. Journaling Questions

Matthew 14:16–20 + Foster by Claire Keegan How do we keep growing when following Jesus has become familiar? How do we remain faithful when life doesn’t turn out the way we expected? In this six-episode series of the Be Still podcast, Still Becoming: Six Conversations about Spiritual Maturity, Lisa explores the ways God may be asking us to keep growing—not simply so we can follow Jesus faithfully for most of our lives, but so we can finish well. Because life can test our faith in ways we never anticipated. When our hearts break, our stories take unexpected turns, and God doesn’t give us the answers we want, what happens to our faith? Through Scripture, great books, and honest reflection, Lisa explores what it means to grow in faith, embrace spiritual maturity, and remain faithful to Jesus through every season of life. What happens when one thing after another has left us depleted—and then love asks something more of us? In this episode, Lisa explores what it means to remain available to love when we feel we have reached the end of ourselves. Drawing from Matthew 14—the feeding of the five thousand in the immediate aftermath of John the Baptist's death—and Claire Keegan's Foster, she considers the quiet, often hidden self-forgetfulness that marks a mature life with Christ. Jesus doesn't ask the disciples to produce what they don't have. He asks them to place what they do have—five loaves and two fish—into His hands. Spiritual maturity isn't becoming a person with inexhaustible resources. It is the increasing freedom to love from within our own poverty, trusting that what feels insufficient can become something more when surrendered to Christ. Often the road to sainthood isn't dramatic. It is simply doing the next loving thing—making the meal, staying gentle, listening again, noticing the person in front of us—without needing anyone else to know what it cost. Perhaps the question isn't whether we have enough. Perhaps it is what we will do with the little we have. In this episode, Lisa explores:

How do we keep growing when following Jesus has become familiar? How do we remain faithful when life doesn’t turn out the way we expected? In this six-episode series of the Be Still podcast, Still Becoming: Six Conversations about Spiritual Maturity, Lisa explores the ways God may be asking us to keep growing—not simply so we can follow Jesus faithfully for most of our lives, but so we can finish well. Because life can test our faith in ways we never anticipated. When our hearts break, our stories take unexpected turns, and God doesn’t give us the answers we want, what happens to our faith? Through Scripture, great books, and honest reflection, Lisa explores what it means to grow in faith, embrace spiritual maturity, and remain faithful to Jesus through every season of life. What happens when experience quietly turns into certainty—and we stop believing we have anything left to learn? In this episode, Lisa explores the humility required to remain teachable as we grow older. Drawing from James 1:19, the story of Joseph, and the wisdom of St. Thomas Aquinas, she considers the subtle ways experience and expertise can make us quicker to speak, defend, and correct—and slower to listen. Spiritual maturity doesn't mean questioning everything we believe. It means holding tightly to what God has revealed while remaining humble about how much we still have to learn. Because no matter how long we've followed Jesus, we remain disciples—and a disciple is a learner. Perhaps one of the simplest and most important prayers we can continue to pray is: Lord, keep me teachable. In this episode, Lisa explores:

Romans 5:3–5 + This Is Happiness by Niall Williams How do we keep growing when following Jesus has become familiar? How do we remain faithful when life doesn’t turn out the way we expected? In this six-episode series of the Be Still podcast, Still Becoming: Six Conversations about Spiritual Maturity, Lisa explores the ways God may be asking us to keep growing—not simply so we can follow Jesus faithfully for most of our lives, but so we can finish well. Because life can test our faith in ways we never anticipated. When our hearts break, our stories take unexpected turns, and God doesn’t give us the answers we want, what happens to our faith? Through Scripture, great books, and honest reflection, Lisa explores what it means to grow in faith, embrace spiritual maturity, and remain faithful to Jesus through every season of life. What if spiritual maturity changes not only what we pray in suffering, but also how we understand suffering itself? In this episode, Lisa explores what it means to suffer differently as a Christian. Drawing from Romans 5, the Catholic understanding of redemptive suffering, and personal experience of what feels like unanswered prayer, she considers how suffering can produce endurance, character, and hope—and how the pain we would never have chosen can become an offering when it is united to Christ. Perhaps the goal isn’t to stop asking God to remove our suffering. Perhaps it’s learning to remain anchored in His goodness while we wait—and discovering that even here, nothing has to be wasted. Our suffering can become prayer. It can become intercession. In the hands of Jesus, it can even become part of the answer. In this episode, Lisa explores:

2 Corinthians 4:16–18 + Heart of Vines by Lisa Brenninkmeyer and Katie Brenninkmeyer How do we keep growing when following Jesus has become familiar? How do we remain faithful when life doesn’t turn out the way we expected? In this six-episode series of the Be Still podcast, Still Becoming: Six Conversations about Spiritual Maturity, Lisa explores the ways God may be asking us to keep growing—not simply so we can follow Jesus faithfully for most of our lives, but so we can finish well. Because life can test our faith in ways we never anticipated. When our hearts break, our stories take unexpected turns, and God doesn’t give us the answers we want, what happens to our faith? Through Scripture, great books, and honest reflection, Lisa explores what it means to grow in faith, embrace spiritual maturity, and remain faithful to Jesus through every season of life. What does it mean to grow older with grace in a culture that keeps telling us to resist aging at all costs? In this episode, Lisa reflects on St. Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 4:16: “Though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed every day.” Through a conversation with her daughter about body image and a story from Heart of Vines, she considers what our bodies are actually for—and how knowing their purpose can change the way we experience aging. Perhaps growing older with grace isn’t about giving up on caring for ourselves. Perhaps it’s about shifting our attention from preservation to transformation—measuring our lives less by what time is taking away and more by the fruit God is still inviting us to bear. In this episode, Lisa explores: