Show Notes
If you’ve ever dabbled in looking into how to extend your life, your social media feed might be inundated with the “hottest” longevity trends: from cold plunges to VO2 max tests to celebrity-endorsed supplements. As a society, we are obsessed with the idea of living longer.
And longevity has become a multi-billion dollar industry where everyone’s trying to sell you their secret to a longer life. But if you meet the people leading that movement, you start to ask yourself “are they even happy?” If we’re all trying to live all these extra years, we should also make sure we genuinely enjoy them.
That’s why I wanted to talk to Dr. Kerry Burnight about how we age. Known as “America’s Gerontologist”, she specializes in the mental, physical, and social aspects of aging. Kerry has spent two decades as a professor of geratric medicine, and co-founded the nation’s first elder abuse forensic center, where she saw older people isolated, exploited, and suffering. After years of arriving after the damage was done, she started asking a different question: what would prevent that suffering in the first place?
Kerry’s answer is a concept she calls “Joyspan,” which is also the title of her New York Times bestseller Joyspan: The Art and Science of Thriving in Life’s Second Half. Her work reframes how we think about our long lives: not as a problem to solve by suppressing the aging process, but as a chance to grow with age and build a life with intention and joy.
In this episode you’ll learn:
➡️ Why the longevity movement lost its way (in a word: humility)
➡️ How Kerry’s mom changed her outlook on life in her late 70s, and is thriving at nearly 98
➡️ Three questions you should ask yourself every birthday
➡️ Why we should stop “growing older” and start “growing with age”
➡️ The one sentence that helps you find something good even when things are hard
➡️ How to help someone who’s stuck, without just commiserating
➡️ Why friendship might be “the Ozempic of longevity”
➡️ The four practices of people who are still loving life at 100
This conversation isn’t about rejecting the gym or the green vegetables – you should take care of your body too! But the parts of life that make it worth living are often difficult to assign a metric. They take work too. And it’s never too early (or too late) to start.
This… is A Bit of Optimism.
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To get a copy of Kerry’s book, Joyspan: The Art and Science of Thriving in Life's Second Half, head to: https://www.drkerryburnight.com/#joyspan
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Chapters Chapters
00:00:00 Dedicating Your Life to Helping Others Age 00:00:43 Beyond Lifespan and Healthspan: Introducing Joyspan 00:02:20 Why the Longevity Movement Lost Its Way 00:03:13 From Elder Abuse to Prevention: A Gerontologist's Journey 00:04:45 How the Longevity Movement Lost Its Way 00:10:40 Introducing JoySpan: The Missing Piece of Longevity 00:13:48 The Chocolate Cake Principle: When Worry Is Worse Than the Thing 00:16:59 What Funerals Teach Us About What Actually Matters 00:18:20 The AGE Framework: Three Questions to Ask Yourself Every Birthday 00:21:25 Why the Intangibles Matter More Than Metrics 00:26:42 Growing With Age, Not Growing Older 00:32:30 Pain Isn't a Mistake: Why We Need to Stop Vilifying Struggle 00:32:45 Finding the Gift in Every Hardship 00:47:20 The Third Leg of the Stool: Friendship as Longevity Medicine 00:52:30 How to Talk to Young People About Aging (And Why Quality of Life Is the Key) 00:57:08 Four Practices for a High-Quality Life at Any Age 00:57:56 Redefining What It Means to Be Old
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Simon is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together.
Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Simon has devoted his professional life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and end the day fulfilled by the work that they do.
Simo
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Hello from Team Simon! Brand-new episodes of A Bit of Optimism are back next Tuesday, October 27. Before then, we're revisiting one last favorite: the company Simon names whenever someone asks which business actually lives the ideas he writes about. It's Gymshark, and its founder, Ben Francis.
Hello from Team Simon! We’re taking a few weeks off and will be back with brand-new episodes of A Bit of Optimism on Tuesday, October 27.
Team Simon here! A Bit of Optimism is on a short break, and brand-new episodes return October 27. Until then, we're revisiting a few conversations we keep coming back to.
Hello from Team Simon! We're taking a few weeks off and will be back with brand-new episodes of A Bit of Optimism on Tuesday, October 27. Until then, we're revisiting some of our favorite conversations, starting with one of the most fun we've ever had: Rob Lowe.
Be honest: you've taken a mental health day that made you feel worse. You stayed in bed, you avoided the thing, and by evening it was still waiting for you—with less of the day left to face it. Amy Morin thinks the problem starts with the word. We treat mental health as something you either have or you don't… and framed that way, there's nothing to actually do on a bad day. Her work runs on the opposite premise: mental strength is a practice, and you build it like you'd build anything else. Amy is a psychotherapist, a clinical social worker, and the author of the bestseller 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do and the new The Mental Strength Playbook. She became a therapist at 22 and lost her mother at 23. Three years later—to the day—her husband died, and the mental health agency where she worked gave her three days of bereavement leave. She built the practices that became her book in real time, from there. In this conversation, Amy walks through exactly what she did to get mentally fit. Not as theory, but as the small, unglamorous things that got her out of bed. And I press her on the question nobody in her field says out loud: whether an industry built to help us has any incentive to finish the job. In this episode you'll learn: ➡️ Why the mental health day you take to feel better isn’t helping ➡️ How to tell whether to solve the problem or solve the feeling (most of us pick wrong) ➡️ The 15-minute daily exercise Amy's clients say lifts the weight of the world ➡️ Why "I am anxious" and "I have anxiety sometimes" build two different lives ➡️ How to compromise with yourself on a bad day instead of going all-or-nothing ➡️ Why "I'm just staying busy" is avoidance we've learned to compliment ➡️ What playing the victim actually gives you (+ why it's so hard to give up) ➡️ Simon's rule for hard days: no crying alone Amy's argument is a hopeful one: the feeling follows the action. Do one small, ordinary thing today, and you've already started. This… is A Bit of Optimism. + + + This episode is brought to you by SAP. Bring it with SAP GROW. The AI Cloud ERP for any size business. Learn more at https://SAP.com/GROW + + + If you’d like to buy Amy’s new book, The Mental Strength Playbook, head to: https://amymorinlcsw.com/books/ + + + Chapters + + + Simon is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together. Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Simon has devoted his professional life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and end the day fulfilled by the work that they do. Simon is the author of multiple best-selling books including Start With Why, Leaders Eat Last, Together is Better, and The Infinite Game. + + + Website: http://simonsinek.com/ Leaderful: https://simonsinek.com/leaderful Podcast: http://apple.co/simonsinek Instagram: https://instagram.com/simonsinek/ Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/simonsinek/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/simonsinek Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simonsinek