Show Notes
If you've stopped acting out, started doing the repair work, and your partner still ends up hurt by the conversations you thought you handled well, this episode names what's actually going on. Caleb and Verlynda walk through the empathic stress paradox, the three shame patterns that re-injure your partner during active recovery, and why individual therapy on shame is often the missing piece. https://therapevo.com/help-for-the-betrayer/?utm_source=podcast
More from Normalize therapy.
For anyone who lies to their partner, even about small things, and hates that they do. Caleb and Verlynda explain why some lies come out before you've decided anything, why the brain's alarm about lying goes quiet with practice, and the six steps that actually help you stop, from correcting a lie in the moment to the trauma work underneath it. https://therapevo.com/help-for-the-betrayer/?utm_source=podcast
If you've wondered whether you're actually addicted to porn or just watch a lot, this episode is for you. Caleb Simonyi-Gindele, a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, explains why frequency isn't the test, what your own broken rules reveal, and whether you can moderate or need to quit. https://therapevo.com/porn-addiction/?utm_source=podcast
You found the messages, the tips, the custom videos, and you were told it was "just porn." Caleb and Verlynda explain why paid, two-way contact with a real person tends to land much closer to an affair, what the choosing does to a bond, and what real honesty and recovery look like from here, whichever side of this you're on. https://therapevo.com/healing-for-the-betrayed/?utm_source=podcast
For couples where one of you keeps reaching and the other keeps shutting down, this episode goes underneath the pursue-withdraw pattern to the two attachment fears driving it, "I will be abandoned" and "I will never be enough," and explains why the partner who looks calm is often the most flooded person in the room. By the end you will know why "just calm down" fails the anxious partner, and the two-part agreement (a named return time, a lowered reach) that actually interrupts the cycle. Free consultation with our couples team: https://therapevo.com/couples-counseling/?utm_source=podcast
For the person who ended the affair and cannot understand why their partner is still devastated, and for the partner watching that relief from inside the worst week of their life. By the end you will understand why ending an affair stops the harm but does not treat it, why "I ended it" cannot land as reassurance, and what the repair actually asks over the next months. https://therapevo.com/help-for-the-betrayer/?utm_source=podcast