150: Why is my ADHD kid MEAN!?

A client told me this week "I wish someone could fix me so I could fix my son." It broke my heart. I knew exactly what she meant. And I wanted to share something with everyone in this community. You're not a bad parent. You've been following the only script your body knows to keep you safe. In this episode I'm going to share a few techniques and give you a little homework to do this week to help you take a very proactive step towards reacting less and controlling your emotions more. 🎉STOP YELLING! The ADHD Behavior Blueprint is HERE!🎉 If you are sick and tired of the same repetitive behaviors and want to see real and permanent changes with you and your ADHD child, make sure you attend my upcoming FREE masterclass. https://calendly.com/responseableparenting/adhd-masterclass Please note: these masterclass dates fill up FAST. I am adding as many as I can. If nothing is available on the calendar register on this waitlist: https://responseableparenting.kit.com/waitlist I will blast out new times as often as I can! If the masterclass is too far away, and you want to take the first step. Grab my 39 minute video / workbook combo where you will learn exactly why you feel so awful in these moments with your ADHD kid AND you'll learn the steps necessary to get out of the heat of the moment and stop reacting so quickly to the same repetitive fight. You can grab Before You Lose It right here! https://responseable-community.circle.so/checkout/gap And if you want to get started TODAY, jump right into the program. When you join you have MY EYES on your challenging patterns. Not just sometimes. But every single week, multiple times a week. You send me your situations, we work together on calls and inside the program until you have a solution that works for YOUR family. You will walk away with a repeatable system that you can use for any challenging pattern. No more strategy spaghetti, just real solutions that work WITH your ADHD child not against them. https://www.responseableparenting.com/join FREE RESOURCES! Tired of repeating yourself over the same behaviors? Try this VALUES DECK OF CARDS! You can customize the cards to your family values and instead of dishing out yet another punishment, you can instill positive consequences through the actions on the back! https://responseableparenting.kit.com/cards

Rage is getting louder. Rage is feeling more ever present in the world of women in their 40s. And rage is influencing our parenting and our relationships. Rage is a key indicator of perimenopause. And when we are in perimenopause our estrogen is fluctuating causing us to have less of an ability to buffer hard emotions and manage negative feelings. In this episode I share how complex this moment can be for us as mothers to ADHD children and the ONE strategy that we will do together as a tribe of mothers to support ourselves. Not so we can support the rest of the family at a level of perfection that we've been striving for that cannot be attained…Rather so we can pull the roots of perfectionism out of our lives and free ourselves from this anger, rage, shame cycle we find ourselves in more and more often. 🎉STOP YELLING! The ADHD Behavior Blueprint is HERE!🎉 If you are sick and tired of the same repetitive behaviors and want to see real and permanent changes with you and your ADHD child, make sure you attend my upcoming FREE masterclass. https://calendly.com/responseableparenting/adhd-masterclass Please note: these masterclass dates fill up FAST. I am adding as many as I can. If nothing is available on the calendar register on this waitlist: https://responseableparenting.kit.com/waitlist I will blast out new times as often as I can! If the masterclass is too far away, and you want to take the first step. Grab my 39 minute video / workbook combo where you will learn exactly why you feel so awful in these moments with your ADHD kid AND you'll learn the steps necessary to get out of the heat of the moment and stop reacting so quickly to the same repetitive fight. You can grab Before You Lose It right here! https://responseable-community.circle.so/checkout/gap And if you want to get started TODAY, jump right into the program. When you join you have MY EYES on your challenging patterns. Not just sometimes. But every single week, multiple times a week. You send me your situations, we work together on calls and inside the program until you have a solution that works for YOUR family. You will walk away with a repeatable system that you can use for any challenging pattern. No more strategy spaghetti, just real solutions that work WITH your ADHD child not against them. https://www.responseableparenting.com/join FREE RESOURCES! Tired of repeating yourself over the same behaviors? Try this VALUES DECK OF CARDS! You can customize the cards to your family values and instead of dishing out yet another punishment, you can instill positive consequences through the actions on the back! https://responseableparenting.kit.com/cards

In this episode I share how my ADHD son had a huge tantrum over not being able to run back inside as we were driving to school to grab some football cards. I share my clucky process to regulate us both in the heat of a time crunch to get to school on time and what I discovered the meltdown was REALLY about. 🎉STOP YELLING! The ADHD Behavior Blueprint is HERE!🎉 If you are sick and tired of the same repetitive behaviors and want to see real and permanent changes with you and your ADHD child, make sure you attend my upcoming FREE masterclass. https://calendly.com/responseableparenting/adhd-masterclass Please note: these masterclass dates fill up FAST. I am adding as many as I can. If nothing is available on the calendar register on this waitlist: https://responseableparenting.kit.com/waitlist I will blast out new times as often as I can! If the masterclass is too far away, and you want to take the first step. Grab my 39 minute video / workbook combo where you will learn exactly why you feel so awful in these moments with your ADHD kid AND you'll learn the steps necessary to get out of the heat of the moment and stop reacting so quickly to the same repetitive fight. You can grab Before You Lose It right here! https://responseable-community.circle.so/checkout/gap And if you want to get started TODAY, jump right into the program. When you join you have MY EYES on your challenging patterns. Not just sometimes. But every single week, multiple times a week. You send me your situations, we work together on calls and inside the program until you have a solution that works for YOUR family. You will walk away with a repeatable system that you can use for any challenging pattern. No more strategy spaghetti, just real solutions that work WITH your ADHD child not against them. https://www.responseableparenting.com/join FREE RESOURCES! Tired of repeating yourself over the same behaviors? Try this VALUES DECK OF CARDS! You can customize the cards to your family values and instead of dishing out yet another punishment, you can instill positive consequences through the actions on the back! https://responseableparenting.kit.com/cards

In this episode I share the findings from 4 studies that look at the physical aggression of ADHD children. I connect the dots from these studies to what is likely happening in your home with your ADHD child when they are frustrated, have been told no, or are being asked to transition. The data suggests that 78.9% of the people who will listen to this podcast have experienced some form of child to parent violence during a moment of dysregulation. That means you are most certainly not alone. My hope in this episode is to share a bigger picture about what is happening for your child as well as proven strategies that will support YOU in the moment as well as strategies that will begin to develop the lagging skills so these moments are no longer common occurrences in your home. STUDIES SITED: Marques, S., Correia-de-Sa, T., Guardiano, M., Sampaio-Maia, B., & Ferreira-Gomes, J. (2024). "Emotion Dysregulation and Depressive Symptoms Mediate the Association Between Inhibitory Control Difficulties and Aggressive Behaviour in Children with ADHD." Frontiers in Psychiatry, 15, 1329401. Hsiao, R.C., et al. (2025). "Multidimensional Factors Related to Engagement in Child-to-Parent Violence among Adolescents with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder." International Journal of Medical Sciences, 22, 3965. Wu, C.F., Tsai, C.S., Chang, Y.P., Chou, F.H., & Yen, C.F. (2025). "Contexts and Parental Management Strategies for Child-to-Parent Violence in Adolescents with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder: A Qualitative Study." Children, 12(4), 483. Murrihy, R.C., Drysdale, S.O., Dedousis-Wallace, A., Remond, L., McAloon, J., Ellis, D.M., Halldorsdottir, T., Greene, R.W., & Ollendick, T.H. (2022). "Community-Delivered Collaborative and Proactive Solutions and Parent Management Training for Oppositional Youth: A Randomized Trial." Behavior Therapy. 🎉STOP YELLING! The ADHD Behavior Blueprint is HERE!🎉 If you are sick and tired of the same repetitive behaviors and want to see real and permanent changes with you and your ADHD child, make sure you attend my upcoming FREE masterclass. https://calendly.com/responseableparenting/adhd-masterclass Please note: these masterclass dates fill up FAST. I am adding as many as I can. If nothing is available on the calendar register on this waitlist: https://responseableparenting.kit.com/waitlist I will blast out new times as often as I can! If the masterclass is too far away, and you want to take the first step. Grab my 39 minute video / workbook combo where you will learn exactly why you feel so awful in these moments with your ADHD kid AND you'll learn the steps necessary to get out of the heat of the moment and stop reacting so quickly to the same repetitive fight. You can grab Before You Lose It right here! https://responseable-community.circle.so/checkout/gap And if you want to get started TODAY, jump right into the program. When you join you have MY EYES on your challenging patterns. Not just sometimes. But every single week, multiple times a week. You send me your situations, we work together on calls and inside the program until you have a solution that works for YOUR family. You will walk away with a repeatable system that you can use for any challenging pattern. No more strategy spaghetti, just real solutions that work WITH your ADHD child not against them. https://www.responseableparenting.com/join FREE RESOURCES! Tired of repeating yourself over the same behaviors? Try this VALUES DECK OF CARDS! You can customize the cards to your family values and instead of dishing out yet another punishment, you can instill positive consequences through the actions on the back! https://responseableparenting.kit.com/cards

Over the past week so many parents shared with me that managing their child's mood was like walking on eggshells. They were constantly scanning for things that would trigger their child or set them off. And they'd try to avoid it but all the strategies used seemed to intensify the moment or backfire completely. In this week's episode I talk about that anticipatory anxiety and how our nervous system's survival strategy is failing us. And I give you steps on how to rebuild that predictability so both you and your child come to these triggering moments in a different way. I give you an example from my own home around the Chrome Book (something my son wants more of and I want less of) and how we were able to rebuild this high conflict moment into something that is collaborative and calm. 🎉STOP YELLING! The ADHD Behavior Blueprint is HERE!🎉 If you are sick and tired of the same repetitive behaviors and want to see real and permanent changes with you and your ADHD child, make sure you attend my upcoming FREE masterclass. https://calendly.com/responseableparenting/adhd-masterclass Please note: these masterclass dates fill up FAST. I am adding as many as I can. If nothing is available on the calendar register on this waitlist: https://responseableparenting.kit.com/waitlist I will blast out new times as often as I can! If the masterclass is too far away, and you want to take the first step. Grab my 39 minute video / workbook combo where you will learn exactly why you feel so awful in these moments with your ADHD kid AND you'll learn the steps necessary to get out of the heat of the moment and stop reacting so quickly to the same repetitive fight. You can grab Before You Lose It right here! https://responseable-community.circle.so/checkout/gap And if you want to get started TODAY, jump right into the program. When you join you have MY EYES on your challenging patterns. Not just sometimes. But every single week, multiple times a week. You send me your situations, we work together on calls and inside the program until you have a solution that works for YOUR family. You will walk away with a repeatable system that you can use for any challenging pattern. No more strategy spaghetti, just real solutions that work WITH your ADHD child not against them. https://www.responseableparenting.com/join FREE RESOURCES! Tired of repeating yourself over the same behaviors? Try this VALUES DECK OF CARDS! You can customize the cards to your family values and instead of dishing out yet another punishment, you can instill positive consequences through the actions on the back! https://responseableparenting.kit.com/cards