Show Notes
Everyone's favorite dysfunctional personality type is back: NARCISSISM. But are we actually helping people understand narcissism, or are we teaching them to label, manipulate, and dehumanize people they find difficult? Today, I'm responding to a viral video from a Christian counselor offering a "7-second test" to expose a Christian narcissist. Her advice? Ask a pointed question, sing "Happy Birthday" in your head, and watch what happens.
I have some questions...
As a Christian and a licensed professional counselor, I'm concerned about the way narcissism has become a catchall label for anyone who challenges us, struggles with boundaries, or fails to meet our emotional needs. And I'm especially concerned when Christians are encouraged to engage in the very manipulative behaviors they're being taught to recognize in others.In this episode, I examine what's wrong with this approach, explain the developmental wounds that can contribute to narcissistic personality patterns, and introduce the work of psychoanalyst Heinz Kohut, whose approach to treating narcissistic pathology centered on EMPATHY.
We talk about the difference between understanding someone's wounds and excusing their behavior, why boundaries don't require contempt, and why compassion and accountability must coexist.
You can recognize dysfunction without dehumanizing the person. You can maintain boundaries without playing power games. And you can face reality without abandoning humanity.
That's what real mental health requires.
I'm Vanessa Bentley, a licensed professional counselor and a therapist who hates therapy culture. Around here, we don't do psychobabble. We do good ideas and real mental health.
Face Reality. Embrace Humanity.
Subscribe for more conversations about psychology, relationships, faith, and the work of being human.
Original video: https://youtu.be/PKp2cqaJtK4?si=6kyef7cp7Hd-xuHz
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