Show Notes
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Most people think the “Mary, Mary, quite contrary” thing is just a rhyme — a cute little bounce off the name. And maybe there’s that thing in there too where it’s giving a quick character assessment of the child, the idea that the wee girl making a tiny, temporary flower arrangement in a sandpit is stubborn or flashes moods or just isn’t always listening. But hang on. She’s asked a reasonable question. She’s addressed by name. To be certain, her name’s repeated, there’s no confusion this could be for anyone else. Mary is asked how her garden grows. She does and does not answer this all at once. She lists what’s in the garden, and repeats the favourite bit, the focus, those lined-up pretty maids. Is that a dig (oops, sorry!) at the fact that the curious person uses her name twice? Is it? Does she, out of petty spite, sass back with her favourite bit of the garden twice, mocking the fact that her name was repeated? We can’t be sure about that. But what’s clear is she never mentions the number of trips to the garden centre, or the fact that some weekends it’s at the expense of other things. She does not talk about what goes into the making of the growing, preferring to just list it out as if that is enough of the news. This person, taking an interest, might now be none the wiser — because there was no clarity. Just a girl messing with the mind of a soul kind enough to inquire. Mary has autism. She thinks she is answering the question correctly. She is supplying the information that matters to her and ignoring the social cue to engage in pleasantries. Instead, she lists the results, what was seen, what was on display. No Sedum, no Hostas. The silver bells are good and fine, but they are not her Special Interest. She really loves the pretty maids. She particularly loves them all there in a row. “Mary” was there to catch a predator, and as she became unsafe, she had to holler, “And pretty maids all in a row” twice, so that the back-up would arrive. (They did not catch it the first time). “Mary” could pass for eight years old when dressed in a smock, with a bonnet and bells, but she was actually much older and had perfected a ‘little girl’ voice which she used on the Take Your Daughter To Work Day once, and the Senior Officer then told her dad that they could use this. They could absolutely use this.
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More from Sweetman Podcast
Welcome to episode three of my new podcast series — Object/ive Permanence — where in one take, no edits, I chat with someone, the conversation is captured, and you can watch and/or listen to it. The podcast is here on Substack but will go out on all the other usual Podcast channels as past of the “Sweetman Podcast” RSS. This is a new experiment. I’m talking to people about an object they bring, and from there we go wherever the conversation takes us. Of course I’ll let them talk about who they are, what they do, and current or past work, but it’s less the focus than the original Sweetman Podcast, which was audio only. For this pod, each guest is asked to bring an object, something to talk about. We get going from there. Emily Writes is an author, newsletter writer, public speaker and MC, a community fosterer and leader, an activist, and she also sometimes writes filthy, horny film reviews too. A broad range! She’s also a friend. As she says here, I’ve known her since back before she was “Emily Writes”. We met as two writers, sharing ideas and seeking advice, from there we grew our families around the same time. Emily had been on my previous podcast — the episodes are still around for you to listen to — and it’s always a good chat. So she was someone I immediately wanted on the new format. We had such a great chat, about writing, and community, and the difficulties in being public; we talked about Palestine, and fundraising, and activism and charity. We talked about family and the arc of our friendship. We talked about that pesky, necessary social media too. All up, a beautiful conversation to share. We had a lot of laughs and we might have even worked a few things out. You can subscribe to Emily’s newsletter and follow her writing here.
Welcome to episode two of my new podcast series — Object/ive Permanence — where in one take, no edits, I chat with someone, the conversation is captured, and you can watch and/or listen to it. The podcast is here on Substack but will go out on all the other usual Podcast channels as past of the “Sweetman Podcast” RSS. This is a new experiment. I’m talking to people about an object they bring, and from there we go wherever the conversation takes us. Of course I’ll let them talk about who they are, what they do, and current or past work, but it’s less the focus than the original Sweetman Podcast, which was audio only. For this pod, each guest is asked to bring an object, something to talk about. We get going from there. Dr Chris Bowden, an academic from Victoria University of Wellington, was high on my original list of potential guests, one of the first people I reached out to when rebooting my podcast. We met for the first time in the slightly awkward introduction to this conversation and interview. Chris’ PhD focused on understanding young men’s experience of losing a close male friend to suicide. Aware of his work with Mates in Construction, and as an educational psychologist, I was interested to talk with Chris and I’m so glad I did. You’ll hear us talk about Joy Division and Metallica, and we will talk about Chris’ life and work. It is a heavy conversation, but there is so much heart and humility from Dr Bowden that I would hope there’s enough light at the end of the tunnel. But absolutely take care if and when watching or listening to this pod episode. Sounds Good! is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
Each month I host an open mic called ‘Say The Thing’. Poems, stories, anything people want to read or speak, provided the wrote it. I usually read a poem or two, or some short prose to kick off, so that no one else feels they have to be the ‘first reader’. This month I read two new/ish Harry Nilsson poems, since that’s my current writing obsession. I read two that I’d only just written and shared, Harry Lied: And Bojanglin’ — ostensibly about the song, ‘Mr. Bojangles’ So you can read along or read the poems instead, or check the text after. But I like sharing the odd audio recording and preserving them for the archive. So this was last week at Say The Thing. We have two more events (Oct/Nov) for 2026. Sounds Good! is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
Welcome to episode one of my new podcast series — Object/ive Permanence — where in one take, no edits, I chat with someone, the conversation is captured, and you can watch and/or listen to it. The podcast is here on Substack but will go out on all the other usual Podcast channels as past of the “Sweetman Podcast” RSS. This is a new experiment. I’m talking to people about an object they bring, and from there we go wherever the conversation takes us. Of course I’ll let them talk about who they are, what they do, and current or past work, but it’s less the focus than the original Sweetman Podcast, which was audio only. For this pod, each guest is asked to bring an object, something to talk about. We get going from there. Duncan Sarkies very kindly agreed to be my first guest. And I don’t even introduce him on camera (how rude!) Duncan’s a writer of films and TV, also novels, plays, and a book of short stories. He is fresh off a spoken word show at the TAHI Festival which I reviewed: That show featured him reading stories from his most recent novel, Stargazers. We also talk a bit about the project, Uncle Bertie’s Botanarium. But beyond that this is a free-flowing conversation that isn’t about any one thing, isn’t pre-planned at all, and isn’t edited. Which is exactly what I want to do with this series of podcasts. It is very much about creativity and connecting and conversation. Which is also what I want. Less of an interview, with some questions arriving about as naturally as possible (hopefully). So, my apologies that the sound isn’t quite how I want it, but this is a work in progress. So audio-quality is on the ‘To Fix’ list. But this is listenable. And watchable. And I hope you like it.
Here’s a reading of a couple of pieces from The Richard Poems, and four new pieces, three of my Harry Nilsson poems, and a poem I wrote just two days before reading. I was the opening for A Party of Poets at The Cabana, in Napier. A terrific event, an incredible lineup to be part of — what I loved was we were all different. The seven poets reading all had different themes, content, and delivery. It’s not my right to record and share the others — but here’s my set. Thanks for reading Sounds Good! ! This post is public so feel free to share it.