Author Chat: Jessica Zucker's Memoir "I Had a Miscarriage" & "Normalize It"

What would change if women stopped being silent about the hardest parts of their lives?

This week, I sit down with psychologist, author, and advocate Dr. Jessica Zucker, the woman behind the viral #IHadAMiscarriage movement, to discuss her memoir I Had a Miscarriage and her newest book Normalize It: Upending the Silence, Stigma, and Shame That Shape Women's Lives.

TW: Infant loss, pregnancy loss

Jessica shares the story behind her 16-week miscarriage, how it deepened her already decade-long clinical work in women's reproductive and maternal mental health, and why she felt compelled to bring that conversation into the public sphere. We also dig into why so many women default to self-blame after pregnancy loss, how our culture has taught us to minimize our grief, and why avoiding painful emotions can be far more destructive than actually feeling them. Plus these big questions: Can pleasure and grief coexist? What does it mean to truly honor a loss? And why do the people who most deserve joy so often feel the least entitled to it?

Come for the conversation about pregnancy loss and women's shame. Stay for the moment Alex and Jessica unpack why grief avoidance, not grief itself, is what really derails us, and the simple, no-excuse practice Jessica recommends for anyone who doesn't have time to fall apart. Warm, honest, and full of gentle permission slips, this conversation is for anyone who has ever shrunk their pain to make others more comfortable — which is probably all of us.

Purchase Jessica's Books: Normalize It! I had a Miscarriage

Find Jessica! Dr. Jessica Zucker's website: drjessicazucker.com Her Instagram: @IHadAMiscarriage

Support the show: On Patreon Buy us a book Buy cute merch Subscribe to the Babes in Bookland Substack

Connect with us and suggest a great memoir! Follow us on instagram! @babesinbooklandpod

Thank you for listening! Xx, Alex

Timestamps! Timestamps! 00:00 Welcome and intro to Dr. Jessica Zucker 01:48 The origins of I Had a Miscarriage and Jessica's background in reproductive mental health 03:08 Jessica's own sixteen-week miscarriage while home alone 04:06 Why shame and self-blame follow pregnancy loss 05:28 Miscarriage as a normative outcome, not a curable one 07:14 Alex opens up about her own miscarriage 09:04 Building composite patient stories across both books 11:44 The #IHadAMiscarriage hashtag going viral 14:19 Letting grief wash over you instead of running from it 15:33 Grief avoidance, numbing, and what actually ruins us 16:09 How being the specialist made her own grief harder to navigate 18:57 Two weeks after the book came out: a breast cancer diagnosis 20:43 Small daily check-ins for people without access to therapy 25:01 Grief doesn't shrink, your life just gets bigger 26:08 Naming Olive and the grief rituals she witnessed in Tokyo 30:14 Can pleasure and grief coexist? Joy as resistance 31:35 The backstory of Normalize It and how it came together during cancer 35:20 Why women carry so much shame 38:04 Can shame ever be a useful tool? 39:35 Talking to her son and daughter about bodies, periods, and sex 44:11 The bravery of a text that just says "thinking of you" 45:52 Mirror or manifesto? 46:38 Body image after breast cancer 48:29 How Jessica stays hopeful 49:02 Where to find Jessica and her books Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.