The Full Stop

Childless, Holidays, Boundaries & Belonging: Navigating Workplace Equity

The Full Stop

Show Notes

Katy Schnitzler returns to The Full Stop five years on — now fresh off submitting her PhD — to dig into one of the thorniest workplace issues for people who are childless not by choice: holidays, leave, and boundaries. The conversation moves from the personal (the strange non-celebration of finishing a PhD, the "full stop" feeling of an ending without ceremony) into the structural: school-holiday leave bias, rota and shift unfairness, "informal favours" for parents, and the particular pressures faced by teachers, midwives and nurses who are childless. Katy shares findings from her doctoral research and her Pronatalism at Work project, and the group works through practical, non-judgemental ways organisations can make leave, language and culture fairer for everyone, without taking anything away from parents. We're talking about ...

Holiday and school-term leave bias against childless employees "Informal favours," rota unfairness and the assumption that childless staff have nothing to rush home for Teaching, midwifery and nursing as flashpoints for childless professionals Ambiguous and disenfranchised grief — why childlessness grief isn't always recognised, even by therapists Pronatalism in the workplace: baby showers, scan photos, "doing it for the kids" culture The intersection of childlessness with disability, chronic illness, singleness and bereavement Practical, low-cost fixes: transparent leave/booking systems, anonymous feedback, external training, first-come-first-served leave policies

Takeaways

Holidays are emotionally loaded for people without children — naming that openly (without banning the topic) helps everyone. "Gentle challenge" responses ("that's not always how it feels") put the work back on the person making assumptions, not the person experiencing them. Transparent, first-come-first-served leave systems can remove parental status from the equation entirely. Anonymous feedback on workload and leave can surface disparities before they become resentment. External, MIST training takes the emotional load off the person going through it — they don't have to "out" themselves to get change. This isn't bashing parents. It's about making space at the table for everyone's story.

Guest Katy Schnitzler — academic and corporate trainer specialising in reproductive health and childlessness (pregnancy loss, infertility, menstrual health, menopause). Founder of MIST Workshops (est. 2020), and author of doctoral research including the Pronatalism at Work project. Listen to the Full Conversation We cover a lot of ground, from anticipatory grief and adoption to the specific dynamics of shift work, IVF and rota fairness.

Learn about the Full Stop on our website and donate to our work at KOFI Childless people are invited to join the Full Stop Community for support, episode discussion and conversation. Learn more about Katy’s work and book training for your organisation at MIST Workshops.

The Full Stop is a podcast for people who are childless not by choice, and for everyone who loves, works alongside, or supports someone who is. New episodes drop regularly — subscribe wherever you listen.

More from The Full Stop

Sep 25, 2026

We're joined by two researchers, Dr Nicola Spurling and Professor Cristina Archetti, for a conversation that goes right to the heart of why the Full Stop exists. Nicola is a sociologist at Lancaster University who's turned her attention to childlessness. Cristina is a professor, psychotherapist, and the author of two books on involuntary childlessness, including her brand-new release, The Trauma of Infertility. Together they talk about what it really means to bring your story into your research, why childlessness isn't a single moment but a process that runs through an entire life Meet Our Guests Nicola Spurling Senior Lecturer in Sociology, Lancaster University "In my current work I explore how, over the past fifteen years, childless people have increasingly used autobiography and storytelling to share experiences, develop knowledge and make sense of childless lives collectively. I'm interested in what happens when social researchers take that knowledge seriously — not simply as material for research about childlessness, but as something that can raise new questions and reshape what researchers think it is important to study." 🔗 Nicola's Lancaster University profile 📄 Nicola's papers (both open access — free to read). A note for listeners: these are written for an academic audience, so the language is quite dense, especially in the opening sections. Nicola is happy to answer any questions if you'd like to dig in.

Aug 26, 2026

What if the question "why don't you have children?" was one you spent your doctorate trying to answer for yourself? That's exactly what Dr Naomi Menahem did. And what she found wasn't the misery she'd half expected. It was something nuanced and defiant, and ultimately more hopeful. In Episode 89, Naomi joins us from Byron Bay to share her research on circumstantial childlessness, the concept of the Deferral Iceberg, and why she's chosen "robust pragmatism" over the quiet resignation of "acceptance." She also tells us about Childless Conversation — her new monthly in-person gathering for women who've been silent for too long.

Jul 25, 2026

In this episode, Michael, Sarah and Berenice are joined by poet Kate Smith — known on Instagram as Millie the Poet and writing under the name Kathryn Millington — to talk about her poetry pamphlet Imprint (Fawn Press), which explores childlessness, IVF and grief. Kate reads three poems live on the episode and talks candidly about her own fertility journey, the process of writing about deeply personal experience, and what it's meant to bring that work into the world. Meet our Guest Kathryn ‘Millie ’Millington is a poet, performer and activist based in Sheffield. She ran the poetry charity ‘Nine Lives Poetry’, creating a stage for emerging local poets. Millie’s poetry tells us a story of grief as a result of involuntary childlessness. It takes us on a journey “…into a world that feels niche, but is anything but…” (Wendy Pratt), to a place of acceptance of a future without children and ultimately a creative and fulfilling life. “You will know someone like me. We are everywhere: at your workplace, within your family, and your friendship groups. It’s such a lonely place. I want to inhabit that place and be that voice, to show that we can create.” Millie has shared the stage with Helen Mort, Michael Pedersen, Toria Garbutt and Leyla Josephine. Her poem ‘Imprint’ was shortlisted for the Bridport Prize. Her debut Pamphlet ‘Imprint’ received praise from Benjamin Zephaniah "I have no words, because you've used them all". Millie is published by Fawn Press and her poetry is available to buy online. You can also buy direct from her, pop her a message via Instagram @‌milliethepoet or email‍ ‍ Recommended Books About Poetry/becoming a creative person

May 24, 2026

Seven years ago, Michael hit record, Sarah spoke and Berenice published episode 1 of the Full Stop pressed publish on the first episode. It was 20 minutes and 20 seconds long. There were 108 downloads. And neither of us had any idea what we were doing. Episode 86 brings us together to mark seven years of honest conversation about childless life. Join us to listen back, reflect, and look forward. In this episode:

Apr 19, 2026

This is the episode for anyone who has ever frozen when someone asked an inappropriate question. For anyone who has said yes to something that cost them far more than it should have. For anyone who is tired of absorbing other people's thoughtlessness and is ready to do something about it. Sandy Langhart-Michelet has spent over a decade building one of the most supportive online communities for childless people in the world — The Childless Life, now 3,500 members strong across the globe. She is also an HR professional with decades of experience in inclusion, a speaker at national conferences, and the author of My Family Tree Stops With Me: A Guide to Purpose and Possibility. She joins us from Baton Rouge, Louisiana, with warmth, humour and a toolkit that will genuinely change the way you navigate the hard conversations. In this episode we cover:

See all episodes →