
Wallet Therapy: Investing for Your Kid Without Losing Your Mind
For The Hayters: The Stories We SurviveShow Notes
The second Becks was born, Becky called Alex in a full panic and asked one question: "What account am I supposed to open for him?" Same energy as everyone who's ever Googled "529 vs UTMA" at 11pm. In this episode, Becky admits she had no idea where to even start, and Alex breaks down every kid investment account without making any parent feel like they're already behind. The Solution Why the guilt parents feel is real, and why you can't pour from an empty cup (you can borrow for college, you cannot borrow for retirement) 529 plans: strong tax advantages and high contribution potential, but locked into education and penalized for non-qualified withdrawals UTMA custodial accounts: flexible and not tied to education, but your kid gets full control at 18 or 21, plus the "kiddie tax" and financial aid impacts to watch for Roth IRAs for kids: decades of tax-free growth, but only if your child has legitimate earned income (sorry, newborns don't qualify) Brokerage accounts: total flexibility, accessible anytime, and the account Alex and Becky both chose for their kids, with exactly why and how they set it up What to do if you're not financially stable yet, because there are still free, low-cost ways to start
This week's homework: If you're not stable yet, open a high-yield savings account in your kid's name and funnel birthday and holiday money into it, or just start building money habits at home. If you are stable, pick the ONE account that fits your family, not your friend's seven accounts on Instagram. Want to ask Alex which account makes sense for YOUR family? Our Patreon members get direct access to her on Discord to ask anything → patreon.com/beckyhayter Because money is emotional, and you deserve to feel safe with it. Love you, mean it. Try Fidelity: https://fidelity.app.link/e/zN0pCpYeUZb Try Monarch: Get 50% off your first year → https://monarch.com/referral/ey3kkk8c7e Connect with us: Join the Live Therapy: Support the show and join our monthly live Q&As at patreon.com/beckyhayter. Share your story: Email us at [email protected] to have your financial scenario featured on the show!
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More from For The Hayters: The Stories We Survive
Every time I open my phone, someone is yelling that the market is about to crash. And honestly? I get anxious when money just sits there. Alex is the total opposite. She’s over here stressing about pulling money out of savings for a lanai she literally saved for. So this week we finally asked the question everyone’s whispering: is the market going to crash? Spoiler: nobody knows. Not Alex, not the guy on TikTok, not even most professional fund managers. The better question is what YOU are going to do when it happens. The Solution Correction, bear market, crash: what those scary words actually mean (10%, 20%, and “oh no”). Panic selling is two bad bets: you have to time getting out AND getting back in, and selling turns a temporary dip into a permanent loss. Time horizon is everything: if you don’t need this money for 30 years, today’s drop isn’t your emergency. Your emergency fund is your crash pad: cash on hand means you’re never forced to sell at the bottom. Sometimes it’s not the market, it’s your portfolio: if a dip has you losing sleep, your mix might be too aggressive for who you really are. Keep contributing: sticking to your plan during a downturn means buying at lower prices. Plus a listener question from a 38-year-old with $250K who wants to move it all to cash, and a detour to a stock market bar in Barcelona where the drink prices crash too. This week’s homework Open your investment account and run the 30% test. Multiply your balance by 0.7 and write that number down. Then sit with it. Would you panic? Would you sell? Would you stop contributing? If the honest answer scares you, adjust your plan now, not in the middle of a crash. Connect with us Join the Hayters on Patreon for early episodes, a monthly Wallet Therapy Live, and direct access to Alex: patreon.com/beckyhayter Got a money question for Alex? Email us at [email protected] See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Trigger warnings: abortion, miscarriage, NICU and infant medical emergency, pediatric surgery, chronic pain, vision loss, panic attacks and alcohol use, parental infidelity and anger, family estrangement. Bree was born visually impaired. By the time she was five, she'd had six or seven eye surgeries. For twenty-two years, nobody could explain why her body worked the way it did: the cataracts, the glaucoma, the hole in her heart, the dental problems dentists had never seen before, and the daily pain she assumed everyone had. At 22, genetic testing finally gave her a name for it: oculofaciocardiodental (OFCD) syndrome, a rare genetic disorder she could pass on to her children. For someone whose biggest dream was to be a mom, the answer didn't feel like relief. It felt like one more thing to grieve. Bree talks about growing up with a mom who fought for her at every turn and a dad who mostly wasn't there, the losses that came before her daughter, a NICU stay nobody could fully explain, and what it's like to sit on the other side of the exam table now, advocating for a little girl who shares her diagnosis. For The Hayters is a podcast that normalizes hard conversations. Listener discretion is advised. Interview, narration, and editing by Becky Hayter, with post-production, scripting, and sound design by Emily Nadal. Don’t forget to subscribe, like, and share to help us continue bringing these stories to light. 🔹 New episodes drop every Sunday! 🔹 Join our community! patreon.com/beckyhayter 🔹 Follow us on Instagram: @forthehayters 🔹 Submit your story: [email protected] 🔹 Grab some merch! beckyhayter.com 🔹 A KILLR Network podcast! killrentertainment.com
Trigger Warning: This episode discusses traumatic brain injury, drunk driving, substance use and addiction (including heroin), overdose, sexual assault, not caring whether you live or die, psychiatric hospitalization, a serious car crash, and the overdose death of a close friend. At 15, Rachel was flying through the air at Worlds. Cheer wasn't her hobby. It was her whole life. Then one summer evening, a drunk driver ran a stop sign and hit her while she was crossing on her bike. She jumped up and told everyone she was fine. She wasn't. The brain injury nobody could see took her grades, her muscle memory, her sport, and her friends. What came after took her to places her family still can't fully talk about. In this conversation, Rachel talks about the years she barely remembers, the parents who never stopped showing up, and the surprisingly ordinary moment she finally walked away. This is a story about teen addiction, invisible injury, regret, and what it looks like to build a quiet life after years of chaos. For The Hayters is a podcast that normalizes hard conversations. Listener discretion is advised. Interview, narration, and editing by Becky Hayter, with post-production, scripting, and sound design by Emily Nadal. Don’t forget to subscribe, like, and share to help us continue bringing these stories to light. 🔹 New episodes drop every Sunday! 🔹 Join our community! patreon.com/beckyhayter 🔹 Follow us on Instagram: @forthehayters 🔹 Submit your story: [email protected] 🔹 Grab some merch! beckyhayter.com 🔹 A KILLR Network podcast! killrentertainment.com
Confession: I took out a personal loan this month. After working SO hard to get where I am, I had to go back ten steps because our old house has not sold and the credit card interest was starting to scare me. I'm telling you because this show is about being honest about money, even when it's embarrassing. I'm also telling you because Alex has opinions about how to do it right. Then we get into the conversation nobody wants to have until they're forced to. What happens when your parents retire and realize they don't have enough? Are you supposed to help? And how do you do that while you're paying your own mortgage, raising kids, and trying to save for your own retirement? Alex and I have lived this one with our own family, so we're getting real about it. The Solution Medicare is not free: Part B alone runs about $202.90 a month in 2026, before deductibles, coinsurance, prescriptions, dental, vision, and hearing. Long-term care is a need, not a place: Whether it's assisted living (median cost around $6,200 a month) or someone checking in on Mom once a day, it costs money and someone has to provide it. Three questions before you help: Is this an emergency? Is there a sustainable solution? Can you actually afford it without wrecking your own future? Don't create your kids' problem: If you sacrifice your retirement to fund your parents', you might be handing the same crisis down a generation. If you're 50 and behind: Know your numbers, estimate what retirement will really cost, plan for healthcare and housing, and have the family conversation now. This week's homework Pick one parent, partner, or even just yourself and ask three questions. How much is saved for retirement? What happens if someone needs long-term care? What do you expect from family financially? Write down the answers, even if they're scary. Especially if they're scary. Patreon members get Alex's full retirement expense checklist and the complete list of questions to ask your parents. Connect with us Join the Hayters on Patreon for early episodes, bonus content, and the full checklist: patreon.com/beckyhayter Questions for Alex? Email us at [email protected] Money is emotional. And you deserve to feel safe with it. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Trigger Warning: This episode discusses human trafficking, sexual violence, child sexual abuse and exploitation, organ harvesting, ritual violence against children, and domestic abuse. A content note comes before the hardest section. Listener discretion is advised. Korrin's mornings look like a lot of ours: breakfast, the childcare handoff, nine-month-old twins who need everything at once. Somewhere between the bottles, there's a call from Uganda and a trip to Ecuador to plan. Korrin is a former Marine Corps cryptologic linguist, an attorney, a volunteer prosecutor, and the founder of Lantern Rescue, an organization fighting human trafficking in 18 countries. In this conversation, Korrin talks about going from an insurance job she couldn't stand to a Russian language school in Monterey, to studying for the LSAT by flashlight in the back of a truck in Haiti. She explains why most trafficking victims don't know they're being trafficked, why those viral "almost got trafficked at Target" posts do more harm than good, and what happened after the night a woman we're calling Rosa was found. This is a story about the worst things people do to each other, told by someone who refuses to look away and still goes home and makes dinner. For The Hayters is a podcast that normalizes hard conversations. Listener discretion is advised. Interview, narration, and editing by Becky Hayter, with post-production, scripting, and sound design by Emily Nadal. Don’t forget to subscribe, like, and share to help us continue bringing these stories to light. 🔹 New episodes drop every Sunday! 🔹 Join our community! patreon.com/beckyhayter 🔹 Follow us on Instagram: @forthehayters 🔹 Submit your story: [email protected] 🔹 Grab some merch! beckyhayter.com 🔹 A KILLR Network podcast! killrentertainment.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.