EP 013: The Rest We Never Get: Why mums can't switch off and what to do about it
Hot Messes, Big VisionsShow Notes
This week we're getting real about the one thing every mum talks about needing but almost never actually gets: rest. We kick off with a stat that'll make you laugh (and cry) — the average mum works the equivalent of 2.5 full-time jobs when you combine paid work, childcare, and household labour. Oh, and the weekend? Sold to us as rest. TGIF indeed. From white-knuckling a weekend full of activities and face paint in the shed, to the concept of a 'switch-off moment' (hint: it used to happen at daycare drop-off), we unpack the reality of modern motherhood — the mental load, the mum guilt, the constant spinning of plates — with humour, honesty, and zero judgement. We also ask the uncomfortable question: when was the last time you genuinely rested? The answer might surprise you (Fiji, 2021, before the second kid arrived). In This Episode [00:00] The 2.5 jobs stat — why weekends don't count as rest [02:00] Weekend activities and the reality behind 'making memories' [03:47] Managing kids' boredom without losing your mind [05:00] Planning excursions in a busy city — chicken nuggets in the air fryer FTW [07:34] Switch-off moments: what happened to just… not thinking? [09:00] The challenge of rest — binge-watching Netflix used to be a valid activity [11:59] The trend of mums actually taking time for themselves (gasp) [13:28] Mum guilt vs. dad guilt — spoiler: not the same thing [15:14] The mental load and calendar management — spinning plates edition [17:57] When was the last time you genuinely rested? [20:00] Messy moments, face paint, and kids in the shed [23:00] Kids' creative play — beautiful chaos [25:00] Language, boundaries, and honest parenting conversations [27:00] The importance of rest — what the research actually says [28:30] Reflecting on balance and closing thoughts Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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We finally got Jacqlin Richards on the pod and she did not hold back. Parenting Alchemist. Award-winning educator. Author of the best book title we have ever heard: F*ck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour. Jacqlin used to be the fun police, the sugar police, the screen police. Blow-drying her hair before a run. Holding it all together while falling apart behind closed doors. Now she actually enjoys her kids, and in this episode she tells us exactly what changed. We talk about: ✨ the perfection trap and why it keeps mums isolated ✨ the love languages exercise her whole family did (steal this one) ✨ why losing your sh*t isn't the problem, the repair is what counts ✨ screens, fear, and getting your kids' buy-in instead of policing them Her book hits Amazon on 28 July and there are a handful of signed pre-order copies left. Pre-order also gets you free access to her live workshop series. Link in bio, or head to jacqlinrichards.com/preorder. Listen wherever you get your podcasts. Then share it with your village 💛 @jacqlinrichards #HotMessesBigVisions #ParentingPodcast #NZPodcast #RealParenting #MumLife #TheVillageCo Find your village at: TheVillageCo.nz Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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