The Real Reason Your Kids Aren't Helping Around the House (And How to Fix It) with Katie Kimball (Ep 309)

Do you feel exhausted and overwhelmed, even when everything looks fine on the outside? Your home might be feeling it too. Megan Caldwell is a mom of three, a two-time burnout survivor, and the creator of the ROCKSTAR Mom Method. She joins me to talk about why balance is BS, why moms need to put themselves first, and how the tiniest actions lead to real, lasting change in your life and your home. In this episode, we talk about: How clutter and burnout feed each other Why Megan wants moms to put themselves first Why balance is BS, and why alignment and harmony work better What losing 98% of her belongings in a house fire taught her about calm Her three phases of change: awareness, decide, practice Minimal viable actions, the smallest steps that build momentum What clutter free means to Megan Your minimal viable action for your home: a 10-minute tidy tonight. Tindy gives you a nightly 10-minute Lightning Tidy with a timer and streaks. Try it free: https://tindy.app The ROCKSTAR Mom Summit starts Tuesday, October 27, and it's free. I'm one of the speakers! Grab your free ticket: https://wannabeclutterfree.com/rockstar Connect with Megan Website: https://megancaldwellpdx.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/megancaldwellpdx/ The ROCKSTAR Mom podcast: https://therockstarmom.buzzsprout.com/ Connect with Deanna Full show notes: https://wannabeclutterfree.com/332 Tindy app: https://tindy.app Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wannabeclutterfree/ Thanks to our sponsors: Check out 1-800-GOT-JUNK and use my code 1800gotjunk.com for a great deal: https://www.1800gotjunk.com Check out BetterHelp and get 10% off at BetterHelp.com

Boo. It's October. Thanksgiving is only six weeks away. Christmas is only ten. Deanna shares the four things she's doing right now so December feels calm, cozy, and intentional instead of frantic. This is her family's first holiday in a brand new house, and her goal is to buy as little as possible. 1. Decisions before decor. Decide how you want your home to feel, then ask what the minimum is to get there. Most of what makes a home cozy is already in it. Plus: why holiday decor should leave your house by the end of October, while a thrift store can still sell it and someone else can still use it. 2. Create your holiday zones. A spot for incoming packages and hidden gifts. A surface for wrapping, crafting, and card writing. Clear counters for baking. And a dining table that isn't buried when people show up. 3. Start the gift conversations. Declutter outgrown toys before new ones arrive, why Thanksgiving is better timing than Christmas for moving them out, and the mindset shift that frees you from gift guilt. Also: how Deanna's family uses a Secret Santa exchange, and why experience gifts are her favorite workaround. 4. Calendar the season now. In pencil. Including asking everyone in your house for their top three must-dos, so you stop doing the things nobody actually enjoys. Your challenge this week: Spend 30 minutes with your decoration bins. If that's too much, set a timer for ten and open one box. Then come tell Deanna what you found on Instagram @wannabeclutterfree. These tips aren't specific to any religion. December is a full month for everyone. Resources Mentioned: Clutter Free Holiday Blueprint: https://www.wannabeclutterfree.com/clutter-free-holiday-blueprint Try the Tindy App Check out 1-800-GOT-JUNK and use my code 1800gotjunk.com for a great deal: https://www.1800gotjunk.com Check out BetterHelp and get 10% off at BetterHelp.com

Deanna moved from a 1969 single level house into a home with a second floor and three full bathrooms. Standing in the new kitchen, her first thought wasn't "look at all this space." It was "how am I going to keep up with all of this?" After a few days she realized she wasn't behind on anything. She had been treating four completely different jobs like one job. The four jobs: Decluttering is deciding what leaves. All decisions, and it takes your whole brain. Tidying is putting things back where they already live. No decisions at all. Cleaning is dirt. It has nothing to do with how much you own. Organizing is deciding where things live. Zones and containers, and it does not have to be pretty. Three ways mixing them up backfires: you start cleaning the kitchen and end up frozen over a mug. You buy bins before decluttering and end up with organized clutter. You tidy every single night and it never holds, because tidying can't fix a decluttering problem. You are not bad at this. When you don't name the job, your brain picks for you, and it usually picks the hardest one. Also in this episode: how to look at a room and diagnose which job it needs, how Deanna's family splits 21 ten-minute cleaning tasks across the week so it doesn't all fall on her, why she's treating her moving boxes like drawers, and the app she had her husband build so the reminders don't live in her head. Your challenge: Say out loud which job you're doing before you start. Set a timer to match. Ten minutes to tidy, 30 to declutter. If you switch jobs mid-task, put the mug down and finish what you started. Mentioned: Tindy at tindy.app (Lightning Tidy, Mighty Tidy, and the new Sm'ores), Dana K. White's container concept, episode 329. Show notes: wannabeclutterfree.com/330

Two weeks into a new house, Deanna is still living out of boxes on purpose. She's running a Packing Party, and while she unpacks, she's doing something that matters more than where the dishes go. She's deciding how this house will work before it fills up. After 17 moves, she knows a house decides how it works in the first few weeks whether you're paying attention or not. So this episode is the three house rules she's putting in place, all built on one framework: if this, then that. A real rule has two parts. A trigger you'll actually notice, and one action. "Be tidier" isn't a rule. It's a wish with a stern voice. Rule 1, for the no: If you pick something up and know you don't want it, it goes straight into the donation bin. No setting it back down and deciding all over again next week. Rule 2, for the surfaces: If you have a flat surface, put a container on it. A tray, a bowl, a basket. The surface isn't the problem. A surface with no boundary is the problem. Rule 3, for the maybe: If you hesitate, it goes in the Pause Box, with a date on it. One to three months. And check the box before you buy anything new so you don't rebuy what you already own. Also in this episode: why willpower fails exactly when you need it, why your cluttered house is a decision problem and not a caring problem, where Deanna's donation bins live while they unpack, the console tray, the entry bin, the fruit bowl, and how house hunting got her family on board with clear surfaces. Your challenge this week: Pick one to three rules. Write them as if this, then that. Say them out loud at dinner tonight and let everyone add one. Then come tell Deanna your house rules on Instagram @wannabeclutterfree. Packing Party results coming at the end of October. Show notes: wannabeclutterfree.com/329 [Next week: decluttering, tidying, cleaning, and organizing are four different jobs]

Five nights into a brand new house, Deanna is recording from a room full of boxes. The furniture is up. A few kitchen things are out. Everything else is still packed. And all three members of her family are about to unpack in completely different ways. In this episode: Method 1: The Packing Party (Deanna's). From Ryan Nicodemus of The Minimalists. Whatever is still in a box stays there until she reaches for it. She's giving it one month. Method 2: The Traditional Way (her husband's). Open the box, decide on every item, finish it, move on. Method 3: The Pause (her daughter's). Unpack what you love now, put the maybes in a box, and revisit them at the end of November. Also in this episode: why moving feels so heavy even when you own less than most people, how Deanna searched every box she owns in about an hour, the sentimental things that earn their place without being useful, and why she and her husband are ready to pare down even further. Your challenge this week: Pick the method that sounds most like you and try it on one space. Packing Party: box up a category and only take out what you need for two weeks. Traditional: empty one drawer and decide on every item. The Pause: put away what you love, box up the maybes, and date the box. Then come tell Deanna which one you picked on Instagram @wannabeclutterfree. Results episode coming in about a month. Mentioned: Tindy, the nightly 10-minute reset app, at tindy.app Check out 1-800-GOT-JUNK and use my code 1800gotjunk.com for a great deal: https://www.1800gotjunk.com Check out Omaha Steaks and use my code BEEF for a great deal: https://www.omahasteaks.com Check out BetterHelp and get 10% off at BetterHelp.com