Show Notes
**SHOW NOTES** Why does sex become more difficult the more we care about someone? In this conversation, I sit down with psychosexual and relationship therapist Kate Moyle to unpack the psychology behind performance anxiety, modern sexual culture, and why so many men feel pressure to perform instead of connect. We explore how stress, distraction, shame, relationship dynamics, and unrealistic expectations affect intimacy, along with practical ways to build healthier communication, confidence, and connection in the bedroom. Whether you're navigating anxiety around sex or simply want a deeper understanding of intimacy, this conversation offers practical insights grounded in both science and clinical experience. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 – Introducing Kate Moyle 00:20 – What a Psychosexual Therapist Does 02:56 – Is Modern Sexual Culture Broken? 05:52 – Performance vs Presence in Sex 08:13 – Why Anxiety Shows Up During Intimacy 11:08 – Changing Gender Roles and Sexual Expectations 13:46 – The Biopsychosocial Model Explained 15:04 – Everyday Stressors That Affect Sex 18:29 – Creating the Conditions for Great Sex 22:06 – Porn, Media and Unrealistic Expectations 26:13 – Why Communication Is Essential for Great Sex 29:57 – Attunement Over Performance 31:30 – Pleasure vs Performance 35:57 – Understanding Unreliable Erections 38:29 – The Psychology of Performance Anxiety 46:41 – Breaking the Anxiety Cycle 53:35 – Addressing Shame Around Sexual Performance 56:52 – Masculinity, Potency and Self-Worth 59:26 – When Relationship Issues Affect Intimacy 01:03:13 – Where to Find Kate Moyle *** Tired of feeling like you're never enough? Build your self-worth with help from this free guide: https://training.mantalks.com/self-worth Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Heard about attachment but don’t know where to start? Try the FREE Ultimate Guide To Attachment Check out some other free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. Enjoy the podcast? Leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram
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