
How Does Connection Change Behavior for Autistic and ADHD Kids? | Ep. 155
Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is DifferentShow Notes
Samantha and Lauren share Samantha’s experience competing for Mrs. Idaho to encourage parents, especially those raising neurodivergent kids, not to feel guilty for doing something for themselves with the right support.
They then discuss choosing “real connection” with a child over society’s idea of “right connection,” emphasizing that behavior improves when children feel connected, safe, and understood, and that a dysregulated nervous system can’t learn or be reasoned with.
They explain how typical expectations like eye contact, loud praise, adult-led conversation, or insisting on “proper” responses can backfire, and encourage observing needs (hunger, tiredness, overstimulation, anxiety, masking) before correcting.
They suggest supporting regulation through reduced demands, co-regulation, sensory-aware environments, predictability, and joining a child’s interests, and invite listeners to a free Parenting the Child You Have online summit on March 13.
More from Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is Different
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Samantha and Lauren interview Susan Minor, a certified relationship coach trained in the Laura Doyle method, about rebuilding connection in marriage, especially for parents under the stress of raising neurodivergent children.
Samantha and Lauren interview Dalisse, an autistic author and mom of two autistic boys, living in Barcelona, Spain, who wrote the five-book Loving Pieces series. Dalisse shares her family’s journey since her oldest son's diagnosis at 17 months, discussing early challenges such as meltdowns, guilt, grief, and uncertainty, and advises parents to give themselves time, take things one day at a time, and not treat bleak predictions as fixed outcomes.
Samantha and Lauren discuss out-of-the-box ways to teach neurodivergent kids kitchen skills. They share practical strategies to include kids without overwhelm by breaking cooking into clear steps, assigning specific tasks, and using visuals, play kitchens, and practice activities like pouring between measuring cups or “mud pie” measuring. They cover progressive knife and cutting practice with kid-safe tools, softer foods, and Play-Doh, while emphasizing safety routines.