So Now I’ve Got Breast Cancer

Sex, dating and intimacy after breast cancer with Charlene Douglas

So Now I’ve Got Breast Cancer

Show Notes

I know what it’s like to have your sex life turned upside down by breast cancer treatment. I’d only been married for a couple of years and neither my husband Dermot or I were prepared for what was about to happen. I wanted him to divorce me and find a woman with 2 healthy breasts and a libido to match.And I know I’m not alone. You’ve sent me so many questions about this that have made my heart break just reading them, and I’m thrilled that we’ve got Charlene Douglas with us this episode to answer them. Charlene, aka The Intimacy Coach UK, is a sex and relationship therapist known for her TV appearances on Married at First Sight and The Sex Clinic. She delivers workshops for Macmillan about cancer, sex and intimacy, and she talks about the importance of getting to know ourselves again before we even speak to our partners.

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Here are the websites Charlene mentioned: OMGYES - https://start.omgyes.com/ Ferly - mindful sex - https://weareferly.com/ Climax.how - https://climax.how/ The College of Sex and Relationship Therapists can be found here - https://www.cosrt.org.uk/ And The Menopause Charity is here - https://www.themenopausecharity.org/ More information about Ohnuts - https://www.jodivine.com/products/ohnut-classic-buffer-rings?page=2 And there are loads of brands of sex cushions out there - just search ‘sex cushions’ to see some options.

Charlene’s website The Intimacy Coach UK contains information and resources for anyone struggling with questions about their sex life - and details of how you can book therapy sessions with Charlene herself - https://www.theintimacycoachuk.com/

And she has a book coming out! You can pre-order it here: Come Closer: Everything You Ever Wanted to Ask a Sex and Relationship Therapist: Amazon.co.uk: Douglas, Charlene: 9780241678879: Books

You can also find Charlene on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/charlenedouglasofficial/?hl=en

And join Charlene’s Facebook group for women here - Pleasure, Fun, and Intimacy! - For Women Who Want More. | Facebook

Charlene also contributed to the booklet ‘Pleasure & Intimacy: A Guide for People Living with Cancer’ which you can download here - https://issuu.com/fruitflycollective/docs/sex_cancer_book

My amazing podcast poet is Donna Ashworth and you heard a poem from her new book ‘Wild Hope - available now in all online bookstores. You can find out more about Donna on her website, or follow her on Instagram and Facebook

You can also watch this episode! Head to my Youtube channel @DrLizORiordan to see this season’s episodes as they are released and lots of other useful videos full of reliable information.

And that’s the last episode in this series! Thanks so much to everyone who’s sent a question and sorry that I haven’t been able to include all of them.

If you’ve got a question for Season 3, then please get in touch online or send me a voice note.

You can find me on social media - Instagram, Twitter and Facebook, or e-mail me at [email protected] .

You can still sign up to my monthly newsletter here

And another place to find out more about breast cancer is my book ‘The Complete Guide to Breast Cancer: How to Feel Empowered and Take Control’. If you’re nosey and want to find out more about my life, my memoir ‘Under The Knife’ - is also available in all good bookshops.

Finally, if you loved the show and want to help other women like you find it, you can leave a 5-star review wherever you get your podcasts, or you can show your support to help keep the show going and buy me a coffee here.

I’ll see you later this year for Season 3 x

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Rebecca Charlton is the voice of cycling on Channel 5, as well as a cycling journalist and author, and in the summer of 2025, she was diagnosed with breast cancer while she was breast-feeding her second child. She’s had to navigate presenting on TV whilst dealing with the aftermath of treatment and coming to terms with her delayed diagnosis, and I can’t wait for you to hear her story.

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Did you know that after breast surgery your scars can become stuck and painful? This is where a good scar therapist can come in, and I wish I’d known this sooner after my mastectomy. Joana Pedroso is a trained cancer scar therapist who wants everyone to be able to move freely again and she explained why scars get stuck and what we can do about it.

Aug 19, 2026

It’s the elephant in the room that no-one talks about when you have cancer - the fact that your sex life can also take a nose dive. But there is support out there, and this episode I’m speaking to Instagram’s @cancersextherapist - aka Zoe Yessian - a registered Mental Health nurse and psychosexual and relationship therapist, who was diagnosed with breast cancer herself two years ago aged just 35. We discuss how cancer can affect our libido and desire and what we can do about it.

Jul 15, 2026

I hope this episode bring you as much joy as it did to me to record it - self-proclaimed cancer kicker, poetry prattler, sales director, photo-grapher, animal lover and nature bather (and possibly the world’s wonkiest qualified personal trainer) Dearbhaile O’Hale aka Derv turned to writing when she was diagnosed with breast cancer to help her process the experience. She was generous enough to share some of her poems with us in this special episode, and talk about her own story from diagnosis to now. I hope her words give you some comfort, or perhaps she will inspire you to write yourself.

Jun 17, 2026

How do you know what to trust online and even - dare I say it - in podcasts, when it comes to breast cancer? There is so much information out there nowadays including people claiming to have “cures” and alternatives to traditional treatments. That’s why I needed to get Consultant Oncologist and Chief Medical Officer for Macmillan, Richard Simcock, onto this episode to help us sift through fact and fiction.

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