Episode 32 | Why It Feels Selfish to Stop Drinking (Especially Around Other People)
The Wine O'Clock WomanShow Notes
Why does something that’s clearly good for you… suddenly feel selfish the moment other people are involved?
In this episode, we unpack the real reason taking a break from alcohol can feel uncomfortable, why it has very little to do with willpower.
For some women drinking is a part of how they connect, unwind, maintain ease in their relationships. So when that changes, even quietly, it can feel like you’ve disrupted something unspoken. Not an argument. A shared rhythm of “this is what we do.”
Stepping outside of that is where the tension shows up.
This episode explores: Why “this feels selfish” is rarely about selfishness
Why the real challenge isn’t the habit, it’s changing the dynamic What happens in relationships when you stop keeping things easy
How these moments can lead to more honest, intentional connection. The discomfort isn’t a sign you’re doing it wrong. It’s a sign the dynamic is changing.
The real question becomes: Are you willing to let it?
If this episode has left you thinking about your own relationship with alcohol, I'd love you to join me at Beyond the Booze Live, my free monthly 90-minute Zoom workshop.
You'll understand why you can promise yourself you won't drink in the morning, only to find yourself reaching for a glass that evening.
You'll begin to see what's happening before that first drink, why alcohol has become your go-to for feeling better, and how to start making different choices without relying on willpower alone.
Beyond the Booze Live: Come and understand your drinking better.
Find out more and save your free place here:
Find out how to work with me If you're ready to make changes- I offer two ways to work together:
The Homecoming Group Programme™ – six months of support to help you break the cycle of drinking, regain control and make choices around alcohol that feel right for you, alongside a community of women working towards the same thing.
The Homecoming Reset™ – private 90-day one-to-one support, tailored to you.
Explore both programmes
More from The Wine O'Clock Woman
Alcohol is sold to women as a reward, a way to relax, connect and cope with life. Yet when our drinking becomes something we're struggling with, we're often left feeling that we're the problem.
Changing your relationship with alcohol can feel like a very private struggle. But what happens when you talk to women who understand exactly what you're going through?
You drank again. Before you decide you’ve fucked it and you’re back at square one, there’s something far more useful you can do.
Why do we keep falling back into old patterns, even when we really want things to change? Julie Smith joins me to talk about the subconscious beliefs behind our behaviour, why willpower only gets us so far, and what needs to change underneath the habit for things to start feeling different.
What are you really looking for when you think, “I need a drink”?