1# Hostage Negotiator: Listening Mistakes Costing You Trust, Deals and Influence | R. Mullender
Thriving Minds with Alberto ZandiShow Notes
This week Alberto sat down with Richard Mullender, the renowned former hostage negotiator and communication expert, to unpack what communication really is, why most people do it badly, and how better listening can transform negotiation, trust, persuasion, leadership, and relationships.
Richard spent decades in policing, with the final part of his career leading Scotland Yard's hostage and crisis negotiation, where the stakes were often life and death. In this conversation, he explains why negotiation is not really about talking more or sounding clever, but about understanding what the other person values, what they are feeling, what they are motivated by, and why they believe they are right.
He challenges some of the most common myths people still believe, including the idea that body language can reliably reveal truth, that asking more questions automatically makes you a better listener, and that great negotiation starts when the formal negotiation begins. According to Richard, trust starts much earlier, and the people who influence best are often the people who understand best.
You will learn Why most people think they are listening, but are actually just waiting to talk Why body language can mislead you, and what to focus on instead How trust is built before a negotiation even begins The six things Richard says you should listen for in every important conversation Why everyone believes they are right, and how understanding that changes everything How to negotiate better at work, at home, and in high pressure situations
Follow Richard & The Listening Institute: https://www.linkedin.com/in/richard-mullender-1b427910/ https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-listening-institute/ https://www.facebook.com/listeninginstitute/ https://listeninginstitute.com/richard-mullender/
Get Richard's books: Amazon
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