Show Notes
Welcome to "The Problem With" where each week we look into a problem to get a better understanding of it. This podcast has no sponsors, only my businesses and investments, please check out the links below.
📍I'm on a mission to help men check their levels of Testosterone, more info here: https://www.manual.co/smith
👁Please check out and try Neutonic here: https://www.neutonic.com/jamessmith
💪For a free trial of my online personal training app go here: https://www.affordableonlinecoaching.com
💰I help small businesses make money online: https://www.jamessmith.business
Psychologist and relationship coach Sadia Khan joins James Smith to unpack the problem with dating apps, modern relationships, and the illusion of infinite choice. Together they explore why technology has made commitment harder, attraction more confusing and why everyone - men and women alike - are struggling to connect in an age of endless swiping.
Sadia reveals the psychology behind sex appeal, status and loyalty, explaining how dopamine, dating culture and false advice online are reshaping human relationships. From incel culture and OnlyFans to the fear of rejection and emotional detachment, this is a raw, unfiltered conversation about what’s gone wrong with love… and how to fix it.
She explains:
◼️ Why dating apps destroy genuine connection
◼️ How “too many options” kills commitment
◼️ The truth about sex appeal and attraction
◼️ Why men and women misunderstand each other online
◼️ The rise of transactional relationships in the digital age
00:00 – The Problem With People Being Single
01:48 – Three Main Problems: Options, Bad Advice & Monogamy
03:28 – Dating Apps: The Illusion of Choice
05:07 – Genetics, Status & What Women Actually Want
08:08 – The Secret Ingredient: Sex Appeal
11:19 – The Three A's: Attraction, Admiration, Adoration
13:32 – Women and Lust: The Sex Response
16:13 – Sexual Dominance vs Sexual Submission
19:30 – Anxiety Kills Sex Appeal
21:11 – OnlyFans: Manipulating Vulnerable Men
24:40 – Sex Workers and Materialistic Values
28:41 – Masturbation in Healthy Relationships
31:39 – The Sex Toy Epidemic
34:36 – Low Testosterone Nearly Ruined My Relationship
38:29 – Stress, Overtraining & Catastrophic Thinking
41:44 – Natural Ways to Boost Testosterone
44:13 – Why Genetics Matter: The TRT Debate
46:17 – Fat Acceptance vs Reality
49:38 – Why Staying Together Requires No Alternatives
51:14 – Two Types of Men: Loyal to the Woman vs Loyal to the Wife
52:35 – The Dubai Dating Scene Explained
55:34 – Why Russian Women Dominate Men in Dubai
58:38 – Escort Culture & Naive Men
1:01:12 – Corrupt Women vs Good Women
1:04:20 – The Danger of Being 39 and Single
1:08:05 – Four Things to Look For Before Having Kids
1:11:49 – Prenups: A Revealer of Character
1:15:12 – Why Your Partner Needs Financial Independence
1:18:05 – AI Relationships: Glamorizing Loneliness
1:19:22 – New Book: The 10 Red Flags
1:20:56 – Closing RemarksClaude can make mistakes. Please double-check responses. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
More from The James Smith Show
Ollie Marchon joins James Smith for a business masterclass on what it really takes to build a fitness brand in the UK right now. A former professional rugby player turned coach, Ollie started out cold calling leisure centre members and training clients in a converted cattle shed. Ten years later he runs Marchon across four verticals: in-person gyms, an online training app, a sports nutrition range and a growing community of hybrid athletes.
Olly Staniland joins James Smith to break down what actually makes a YouTube video work. Olly works on James's YouTube channel and, like James, studied under Ed Lawrence. They go through real thumbnails and analytics from James's channel, why one video with 80,000 views made nothing while another with 60,000 made thousands, how Matt Armstrong and Carwow built huge channels by repeating one format, and the status games that drive what people click and buy.
Ross Edgley joins James Smith for a reunion years in the making. Ross is the ultramarathon sea swimmer who swam around Great Britain and then the whole coast of Iceland.
Alan Barratt on entrepreneurship, business ownership, and the reality of building a brand from the ground up.
Rebecca Oliver-Mooney joins James Smith for a conversation that starts with a left-handed can and ends up somewhere far more uncomfortable. Founder of the Raising The Glass network and a drinks industry buyer who has sat on the other side of the table from hundreds of challenger brands, Rebecca explains why most founders put half their message where the shelf will hide it, why GLP-1s are about to reshape what food and drink gets made, and why menopause is the category nobody has been willing to build for yet.