Show Notes
My guest today has written a book about how much we underestimate teenage girls, and why we'd do well as parents to listen more to what they have to say. Chelsey Goodan has interviewed dozens of teenage girls about what's going on in their lives, and what they need from adults in order to thrive. We talk about perfectionism and self-esteem, shame around sexuality, and the best way to get teenagers to develop a healthy relationship with their phones and social media – spoiler alert, it doesn't involve banning apps and confiscating their phones.
Chelsey talks about her own experience of being a people-pleaser as a teenager. Always wanting to be the 'good girl', Chelsey didn't realise how much this tendency was hurting her. She goes on to tell us how she became a 'recovering perfectionist' and gives some ideas to support mothers who have carried perfectionism into their parenting journey.
She also tells me that trying to protect our girls can backfire by giving them a victim mentality. Instead, she says, we need to empower teenage girls to trust their own inner voices, know what they need, and have agency over their own safety and directions. She answers the question "is social media dangerous" and has an interesting take on how we can introduce our teenagers to smartphones.
Chelsey has written a great book about how what teenage girls are really feeling and how judged they often feel. It's a brilliant explanation of what's going on for our daughters and how we can support them more constructively to be the best they can be emotionally. You can find Chelsey's book here:
* Underestimated: The wisdom and power of teenage girls [https://amzn.to/4hKA0Ed] (affiliate link) * Chelsey's website [https://www.chelseygoodan.com/] * Chelsey on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/chelseygoodan/]
More teenage parenting from Helen Wills
* Helen Wills Counselling and Parent Coaching [https://helenwills.com/] * Actually Mummy parenting teens blog [https://www.actuallymummy.co.uk/] * Helen on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/iamhelenwills/]
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Please note that Helen Wills is not a medical expert, and nothing in the podcast should be taken as medical advice. If you're worried about yourself or a teenager, please seek support from a medical professional.
Episode produced by Michael J Cunningham [https://www.linkedin.com/in/michael-j-cunningham-245586266/]
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Parents often worry about the teenage years. The term 'threenager' is frequently used to describe the toddler tantrums that leave parents tearing their hair out. I used it myself, with an eyeroll and a wry smile, but now that I've been through the teenage years I'm apologetic about that. I think it's patronising, and it doesn't help our relationships with our teens.
Today's guest is content creator and copywriter Tom Pinks, who is The number of teenagers saying they don't drink alcohol is 39% [https://www.thegrocer.co.uk/news/huge-rise-in-low-and-no-alcohol-consumption-among-young-adults-yougov-poll-shows/686689.article#:~:text=Nearly%20four%20in%2010%20(39,from%20drinking%20alcohol%20at%20all.].
TW: Self-harm