
Show Notes
What does it really mean to be mentally healthy? In this conversation, I sit down with mental health advocate Gabe Howard, of the well-known Inside Mental Health and Inside Bipolar podcasts, to explore one of the biggest questions facing our culture today: How should we understand mental illness? Gabe shares his deeply personal story of being diagnosed with bipolar disorder after waking up in a psychiatric hospital at 26 years old. Together, we talk about what that diagnosis meant to him, how it shaped his identity, and why hope—not hopelessness—became the turning point in his recovery. Along the way, we wrestle with some difficult questions: What is the difference between mental health and mental illness?
Are diagnoses permanent identities, or can people genuinely heal and grow?
Why are terms like OCD, ADHD, anxiety, and trauma used so casually today?
What happens when our beliefs about ourselves become disconnected from reality?
How do childhood experiences shape the stories we tell ourselves as adults?
As a therapist, I also offer a different lens than diagnosis alone. Rather than beginning with symptoms, I ask, "Tell me everything." I believe understanding a person's story often reveals far more than simply naming a disorder. We discuss: The difference between diagnosis and case conceptualization
Why context matters in understanding suffering
How shame distorts our thinking
The role of attachment, identity, and early family dynamics
Why memory can become fragmented when we're living in survival mode
The importance of telling our stories honestly—and having someone who is willing to listen
Whether you agree with every perspective we discuss or not, my hope is that this conversation invites you to think more deeply about mental health, healing, and what it means to become more fully human. If this episode encouraged you, I'd love for you to subscribe, share it with someone who might benefit, and join the conversation in the comments.
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ADHD isn't a good enough explanation... Paul Drayton was diagnosed with ADHD in 2021. Like many people, receiving the diagnosis brought relief. Experiences and behaviors that had confused him for years suddenly had a name.But does giving something a name explain it?In this conversation, I wanted to try something different. Instead of interpreting Paul through the diagnosis, I wanted to understand HIM.So we moved away from the label and into his life.We talked about the sensitive little boy who sometimes escaped the noise of his home. A family where emotions weren’t easily expressed. A teenager whose mind wouldn’t quiet down. Alcohol. Addiction. Creativity. Impulsivity. Relationships. And a deeply human desire to be heard and understood.And the further we moved away from the diagnosis, the more interesting the conversation became.We also examine what we actually know about ADHD, what we don't know, and the difference between identifying a collection of behaviors and establishing their cause.This isn't about replacing one reductive explanation with another.I simply refuse to reduce a human being to one in the first place.Paul is not "ADHD."He is a man with a history, relationships, wounds, strengths, choices, adaptations, longings, and a story still being written.And, like every one of us, he is infinitely more interesting than a diagnosis could ever account for.Paul Drayton is an actor and author of Ride — Or Die Trying.Click subscribe to follow the show!Follow me on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vanessathetherapist/Follow the show: https://www.instagram.com/theworkofbeinghuman/Paul's book: https://www.amazon.com/Ride-Die-Trying-Before-Laughter/dp/B0HDR233Q9/ref=tmm_aud_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&dib_tag=se&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.zbHEfHT7LWcK5skFtpnfetf2njpzYJGzMI6RJNu1CPpuD5HHsQjOh90A5MEFcA0xH3moj6EYSJ9y00dLLQ71rHc0ARZH9Qg04Yb57OK4wc8M8guK4rxDGn2jKNsggHDjlb9UXuyUB4xDRErXjDrauCiZ4SnmlsS45HtjoLyljj7cVOd7nU7tGGSGGzPb2zLu5-FPsc6xieqIVkY7LpgxRVYYS0qG-f4kSd5X3tCo9hs.ywH5bmWrV2VuQCVSm_epW66i1Kr9WKadQIPBtYjw5Dg&qid=1789350621&sr=1-1