Men, Sex, and Pleasure with Cam Fraser

#284 Slowing Down for Full-Body Erotic Connection (with Pamela Madsen)

Men, Sex, and Pleasure with Cam Fraser

Show Notes

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, Pamela Madsen, a U.S.-based sex educator specializing in hands-on somatic education, discusses eroticism as full-body passion rather than orgasm-focused performance. We explore how goal-oriented “purpose” messaging can turn sex into pressure around erections, penetration, and climax, while many women primarily want attention, eye contact, and presence. We distinguish quick, private masturbation habits from partnered intimacy and suggest building “erotic endurance” through non-genital touch like massage, slowing down even more, and starting connection before the bedroom.

Key Points: 02:59 Purpose Versus Pleasure 08:02 Presence And Attention 10:45 Masturbation Habits And Porn 18:58 Erotic Endurance Mindset 28:46 Play As A Portal 30:49 Roleplay And Avatars 33:50 Bringing Intention Back

More from Men, Sex, and Pleasure with Cam Fraser

May 15, 2026

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, Cam shares a selection of clips from his social media where he has debunked alpha male talking points. This is a collection of shorter videos.

May 8, 2026

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, Cam chats with Freya, a sex coach and educator and host of The Labia Lounge. They discuss her “Find Freya a Fella” hybrid PR/social experiment aimed at finding a partner while documenting modern dating frustrations like app fatigue, micro-rejections, loneliness, and Australia’s “nonchalance” about showing interest. Boycotting apps, she attends Melbourne singles events and practices meeting people “in the wild” by initiating conversations, being more approachable, and building community to counter scarcity mindset. They explore ethical “practice” in approaching strangers, attunement to cues, reducing pressure by reframing dates, and her idea for a “Mates and Dates” mixer. Freya shares mixed results—some dates but no long-term match—plus stigma women face for openly wanting commitment, and where to follow the campaign online.

May 1, 2026

Is OnlyFans Social Media? Intimacy, Ethics, and

Apr 24, 2026

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, Cam chats with Rae Szereszewski, a sexual health educator and relationship coach, to discuss sexual choking/strangulation, noting there is no fully safe way but there are harm-reduction approaches and a need for teen education beyond pregnancy/STIs given porn influence. Rae reframes STI education as “not if, but when,” focuses on non-stigmatizing disclosure and communication, advocates “team disclosure." They also cover sex-positive space etiquette, consent as a spectrum, and aligning words and actions with better check-ins.

Apr 17, 2026

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, we take a trip down memory lane as Cam shares a presentation he gave at Camp Lovehoney back in 2020. He explains how toys and lube can support sexual health and pleasure, including using masturbators to help premature ejaculation and erectile difficulties by retraining stroke patterns and reducing friction, and using edging to prolong arousal. Cam highlights prostate play as a pathway to non-ejaculatory prostate orgasms, multi-orgasmic potential, and greater empathy as a penetrative partner, citing survey findings that partners of men who’ve explored anal penetration report higher satisfaction. He shares Lovehoney study stats on toy use and reviews products including a thrusting masturbator with dirty-talk audio, a vibrating couples ring, and a remote-controlled prostate massager, plus previews upcoming BlowMotion masturbators and answers audience questions.

See all episodes →