#17: ADHD and Autism in Marriage: Pet Peeves, Problems, and Understanding Each Other
South of NormalShow Notes
Tiny things can feel huge in a neurodivergent marriage. Jheri South, ADHD educator and mom of seven neurodivergent kids, sits down with her husband Brad South, who is on the autism spectrum, to play “Pet Peeve or Problem” and show what ADHD and autism actually look like in real life.
They get into the stuff that usually starts as a joke and then turns into a fight, like clutter, laundry, texting with no context, short replies, sudden plan changes, shutdowns, and impulse decisions. The goal is not to blame either brain. It is to name the pattern so you can stop taking it personally and start translating each other better.
If you have ever felt like you are speaking two different languages in the same house, this episode will help you see what is happening and what to do next.
(00:00) Introduction (03:11) Loud Noises and Kids Repeating Questions (06:11) Garbage, Laundry, and “Put It Away” Anxiety (07:39) Losing Keys and Phone in an ADHD Autism Home (10:35) Random Items and the Work Boots in the Walkway (14:08) Texting Tone, “Sure,” and No Context Messages (15:15) Change of Plans, Drive Through Stress, and Clutter Fights (24:46) Shutdowns, Silence, Planning, and Impulsivity in Marriage
What is one “small” thing in your relationship that turns into a big fight? Leave your answer in the comments.
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Tiny things should not feel this big. But in a neurodivergent marriage, they can . Jheri South, ADHD educator and mom of seven neurodivergent kids, sits down with her husband Brad South, who is on the autism spectrum, to play “Same Team, Different Brains.” What starts as a fun rapid fire game quickly reveals why ADHD and autism can clash over plan changes, shutdowns, overwhelm, reassurance, and communication.