The Dementia Collective

Harder Than Being Governor: Caring for My Wife with Alzheimer’s (with Governor Martin J. Schreiber)

The Dementia Collective

Show Notes

What does it mean when a former governor says caregiving was harder than public office?

In this episode, Andrew Karesa sits down with former Wisconsin Governor Martin J. Schreiber, author of My Two Elaines, for a deeply personal conversation about loving, caring for, and slowly losing his wife Elaine after her Alzheimer’s diagnosis.

Marty brings a perspective few people can offer. He has lived in the world of leadership, policy, and public responsibility, yet says the hardest role he ever held was caregiver. What unfolds in this conversation is not a political discussion, but a human one. It is about what dementia asks of a family, how caregiving changes your identity, and why so many people are unprepared for what the journey really becomes.

Together, Andrew and Marty explore the emotional reality of caring for someone whose mind is changing over time. Marty reflects on the idea behind My Two Elaines: that the woman he loved was still there, but Alzheimer’s required him to relate to her differently. In turn, he had to become a different version of himself too.

The conversation also explores the hidden toll caregiving takes on families, why caregivers must protect their own health, and what governments still fail to understand about supporting families living with dementia.

In this episode: • Why caregiving was harder than being governor • The meaning behind My Two Elaines • How dementia changes both the person diagnosed and the caregiver • Why arguing with dementia often makes things worse • The emotional toll caregiving takes on spouses and families • Why caregivers must protect their own health • What policymakers still misunderstand about dementia care

Whether you are caring for a spouse, supporting a parent, or trying to understand how dementia reshapes a family, this conversation offers honesty, perspective, and a reminder that even when memory changes, connection still matters.

Learn more at:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.bluebellvillage.ca ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://mytwoelaines.com/index.php/about-martin/ Disclaimer: The information shared in this podcast is for general informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. It should not be used to diagnose, treat, or prevent any medical condition. Always consult your physician or another qualified healthcare provider regarding any questions you may have about a medical condition or treatment. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Andrew Karesa, blueBell Village Ltd., or any of its employees, contractors, or team members.

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