
158: Kindergarten Transition for Sensitive Kids: What the Bedtime Meltdowns Really Mean and How to Help Your Child Adjust
Raised Resilient: Help Your Highly Sensitive ChildShow Notes
<p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Does your sensitive child seem totally fine at school, calm at drop off and easygoing with their teacher, only to completely fall apart when bedtime comes, leaving you wondering what a meltdown showing up somewhere you weren't looking actually means?</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">In this episode, I walk you through how I'm watching for signs of stress in my own sensitive child during her kindergarten transition, even though she isn't showing any of the signs I expected.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">I talk about the water pitcher concept I use to explain how kids carry stress they don't show, and how a child can separate just fine, do great with her teacher, and still be overwhelmed by everything her body is managing all day. I share the one meltdown we did have, what set it off, and why bedtime tears finally showed up. </span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">You'll learn:</span></p><ul><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why a child can separate without tears and still be carrying a full day of stress</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What the water pitcher concept explains about meltdowns that seem to come from nowhere</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How stress hormones make it harder for overtired kids to fall asleep</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why bedtime tears show up even when the day looked easy</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What to say when your child tells you they hate school and never want to go back</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How play helps a child process a school transition that didn't make sense to them yet</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why pushing through playtime can trigger the meltdown you were trying to avoid</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What it means when your child says they save their tears for you</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How to tell the difference between a hard transition and separation anxiety</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why occasional meltdowns during a big transition don't mean something's wrong</span></li></ul><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">If you've been searching for what a calm kindergarten transition is hiding, or wondering how to build emotional safety for a sensitive kid, this episode is for you.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Here's to raising resilient kids,</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Dr. Hilary</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Find more from Dr. Hilary:</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Raised Resilient | </span><a href="https://www.raisedresilient.com/" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">Website</a><span style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);"> </spa
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<p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Does your child go from angry at breakfast to yelling "I hate you" by dinner? </span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;"><span class="ql-cursor"></span>In today's episode, I unpack why your child seems angry all the time and what's REALLY going on underneath. We get into where does people pleasing come from, which is an important starting point since so many of us grew up conflict avoidant, sitting on suppressed anger. </span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">You'll learn:</span></p><ul><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What causes people pleasing, and how it shapes the way you react to anger</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How a "good girl" childhood can lead to a conflict avoidant personality as an adult</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why a five-year-old's anger comes out in such messy ways (and yours did, too)</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How your own repressed anger can show up when your child starts yelling</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why anger is a secondary emotion, and what it might be protecting your sensitive kid from</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why mom rage can flare the second your child gets angry at you</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What is emotional safety, and what does it look like on a hard day?</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What softening really means when your child is kicking and calling you names</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How to create emotional safety when you're too angry to soften</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why it can feel like gentle parenting doesn't work, even with the right script</span></li></ul><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">If your child seems angry ALL the time and you've started to wonder if this is just who they are, this episode is for you. </span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Here's to raising resilient kids,</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Dr. Hilary</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Find more from Dr. Hilary:</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Raised Resilient | </span><a href="https://www.raisedresilient.com/" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">Website</a><span style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent;">| </span><a href="https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">Instagram</a><span style="background-color: transparent;"> | </span><a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/raisedresilient" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">
<p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Have you ever caught yourself Googling "am I raising a narcissist" at 2am after another rough day? Does your child hit their sister, call you names, and show zero remorse? Do they melt down every time you say no, or shut down the second you ask them to own what happened?</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;"><span class="ql-cursor"></span>In this episode, I share why sensitive, emotionally intense kids can look narcissistic.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">You'll learn:</span></p><ul><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why your sensitive kid can show a lack of empathy when someone else is hurting</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why your child's still-developing emotional regulation can get mistaken for narcissism</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What narcissistic personality disorder actually looks like, according to the DSM-5</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What your child's age has to do with the question of raising a narcissist</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How narcissism really develops, and what's hiding underneath all that grandiosity</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why your sensitive kid feels SO much shame, no matter what you do</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What is emotional safety, and how it changes the way your child handles shame</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What does emotional safety look like when your child has just hit their sibling</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How to create emotional safety after you've lost your cool with your kid</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What's really behind extreme defensiveness when you ask your child to take accountability</span></li></ul><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">If you’ve ever worried about what your child’s behavior means for who they will become, this episode will help you understand what may be going on underneath the surface.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Here's to raising resilient kids,</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Dr. Hilary</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Find more from Dr. Hilary:</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Raised Resilient | </span><a href="https://www.raisedresilient.com/" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">Website</a><span style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent;">| </span><a href="https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">Instagram</a><span style="background-color: transparent;"> | </span><a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/raised
<p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Is gentle parenting not working even after every script you've tried? </span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Gentle parenting was never meant to be a list of scripts you follow perfectly. Your child is unique, and what helps one child calm down can make another child feel even more overwhelmed.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">So, in today's episode, I share five popular gentle parenting techniques that can make meltdowns worse with your sensitive kid, and WHY each one backfires. </span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">You'll learn:</span></p><ul><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why gentle parenting doesn't work the way the reels make it look with your sensitive kid</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What your child actually hears when you circle back after the meltdown</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">Why your child can tell you hitting isn't kind and still do it again</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How the emotional water pitcher explains the meltdown that shows up after school</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How co-regulation strategies for parents shift when your child yells "go away"</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What co regulation parenting looks like when naming feelings makes it worse</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">What gentle parenting REALLY asks of you when your kid needs your calm</span></li><li><span style="background-color: transparent;">How to catch yourself as an overstimulated mom before your tone turns sharp</span></li></ul><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;"><span class="ql-cursor"></span>If you’re tired of wondering why the strategies you’ve been told to use aren’t helping, this episode will help you understand what may be happening underneath the meltdown and what your child might actually need from you in those moments.</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Here's to raising resilient kids,</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Dr. Hilary</span></p><p><br></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Find more from Dr. Hilary:</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">Raised Resilient | </span><a href="https://www.raisedresilient.com/" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">Website</a><span style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);"> </span><span style="background-color: transparent;">| </span><a href="https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">Instagram</a><span style="background-color: transparent;"> | </span><a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/raisedresilient" target="_blank" style="background-color: transparent; color: rgb(61, 133, 198);">Face